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Thread: Elite Dangerous Writing Contest - November 2017

  1. Click here to go to the next staff post in this thread. #121
    Already a load of entries!



    I've got a lot of reading ahead of me, looking forward to it.

  2. #122

    Libre office

    Originally Posted by Un1k0rn View Post (Source)
    Does Frontier want us to send in our submission as the full story in the E-mail itself, or will a file attachment be required? I'm asking as I use Libre Office for my word processing needs, and IIRC, Libre saves documents in a different format to Microsoft Word. (Been a while since I needed to use it)
    Hello, I use Libre at office too, you can save as and save as MSOffice doc or docx. I do that a lot, works fine

  3. #123
    I live in Denmark, so English is not my native language.

    For all those of you who - like me - have not been speaking English since early childhood, I would definitely recommend an extra step when proofreading your story: Take a closer look at all adjectives and descriptive verbs/nouns, even those that you feel pretty sure about.

    It's my experience that many of these words - although their meaning is almost the same - each have a specific "flavour" to them. For instance, one word can mean... I don't know... being loud (neutral) and another can mean being loud (frightened) or loud (abusive) etc.

    If English is not your native language, these flavours can remain undetected, making a story that seems very clear to yourself seem a bit confusing to those who speak English as their native language.

    Another thing: I really like the idea someone put forth in this thread about Frontier presenting more than just the winner and runner ups somewhere - perhaps in another thread. Writing is a whole lot more fun, when you know that others get to read what you have written :)

  4. #124
    Originally Posted by Dale Emasiri View Post (Source)
    Already a load of entries!

    I've got a lot of reading ahead of me, looking forward to it.
    Just as long as the spam filter didn't eat mine!

  5. #125
    Originally Posted by Phoenix_Dfire View Post (Source)
    Just as long as the spam filter didn't eat mine!
    Good point, would be nice to get acknowledgement of reciept.

  6. Click here to go to the next staff post in this thread. #126
    Originally Posted by Evoflash View Post (Source)
    Good point, would be nice to get acknowledgement of reciept.
    Will try to do that later this week with the ones we've received so far! I'll try to do this as I check off entries and compile the list of people who have entered so far (for internal use)

  7. #127
    Originally Posted by Dale Emasiri View Post (Source)
    Will try to do that later this week with the ones we've received so far! I'll try to do this as I check off entries and compile the list of people who have entered so far (for internal use)
    Superb thank you!

  8. #128
    I’m over 3k now, and can’t trim any further so I’m going to keep going until you want something longer, or I quit.
    Thanks for getting this out of me, it’s fun.

  9. #129
    Originally Posted by BusterSSNS91 View Post (Source)
    I’m over 3k now, and can’t trim any further so I’m going to keep going until you want something longer, or I quit.
    Thanks for getting this out of me, it’s fun.
    You've still got almost three weeks. What I'd recommend is that you take your story and re-write it from the ground up, you'll probably find away to get the story across but in a more lean way. My first draft was 2500 words, was pretty much in the same place. However, 2 re-writes later got it down (just).

  10. #130
    Originally Posted by Dale Emasiri View Post (Source)
    Will try to do that later this week with the ones we've received so far! I'll try to do this as I check off entries and compile the list of people who have entered so far (for internal use)
    Thanks, Dale. Always reassuring to know your submission didn't get lost in the ether. o7

  11. #131
    Originally Posted by Dale Emasiri View Post (Source)
    Will try to do that later this week with the ones we've received so far! I'll try to do this as I check off entries and compile the list of people who have entered so far (for internal use)
    that would be awesome Dale, I have no idea if mine has been received or not

  12. #132
    Originally Posted by BusterSSNS91 View Post (Source)
    I’m over 3k now, and can’t trim any further so I’m going to keep going until you want something longer, or I quit.
    Thanks for getting this out of me, it’s fun.
    Mine was 3,100, and I felt like "there's no way to cut it down that far". It really was a great exercise in editing and concise writing. My final submission was 1,997, and I feel like I retained the plot points I needed.

  13. #133
    Honestly, I never written anything before. At least nothing for someone else outside of just outing of immagination or frustration. Never with a purpose or a public.
    I know it's unlikely that i will get somewhere, but Elite is part of my gaming life so I did enter it. :P Will be fun to see where it gets me. Fun experience. I might do it again.

    Goodluck everyone :d

  14. #134
    Originally Posted by Phoenix_Dfire View Post (Source)
    Right,

    Mine's sent. 1997 words, talk about scraping it.

    It can be found here Intercept
    Well mine has scraped in at exactly 2000 words, couldn't have planned it if I'd tried!

  15. #135

    My submission: Cat’n’Mouse

    Just submitted my attempt at 1993 words. Story below, be nice with any feedback.

    Gravity got heavier on Federal Dropship FNS Warspite and both pilot Saqr and copilot Brigham knew instantly what that meant.
    Brigham pulled up his navigational console scanning for who was trying to interdict them, while in front of him Saqr fought hard at the helm to prevent them from plummeting out of supercruise.
    “Target confirmed, Imperial Clipper” he announced. His mind raced, they were in Federation space, this system was isolated and uninhabited. Clippers were large ships with overkill shields, but most importantly they were very fast.
    “I won’t be able to shake this interdiction then” Saqr announced.
    “We’ll lose if we try and fight on their terms” Brigham replied.
    “Correct, but we don’t have many options, this is Federation Space and we need to repair that relay.”
    “Do you think it was a trap?” Brigham asked.
    “Unsure, what are our options?”
    Brigham pulled up the system map.
    “Nothing close this side of the primary, on the other side we have a gas giant about three thousand Ls out”
    “Does it have rings?” he inquired.
    “Yup, got an idea?” Brigham responded.
    “Let's play some cat and mouse” Saqr yelled back.
    “Sounds like a plan” confirmed Brigham.
    “Strap in tight, I’m dropping out of this interdiction then commencing a turn and burn” Saqr announced.
    Brigham swore under his breath.
    Brigham had been Saqr’s copilot for three years now, however, no amount of time could get him, and more importantly, his stomach used to such maneuvers.
    Brigham’s train of thought was cut off by the crushing pressure as they deliberately crashed out of supercruise.
    Saqr wasted no time once out of supercruise and started the maneuver.
    Both ships would leave supercruise facing the same direction and would be moving with the momentum they built up in supercruise. It would not take long for the Clipper to catch up with them.
    However, if Warspite was heading in the opposite direction when the Clipper came out of supercruise they would gain far more distance and be able to jump back into supercruise with a headstart.
    The strategy has a few downsides. Firstly crashing out of supercruise and doing a turn and burn would stress the integrity of the ship, if it doesn't break anything immediately it will certainly shave a few years of the ships life. Secondly, unless they get really lucky, they will be heading towards the Clipper when it emerges from supercruise.
    With all power directed into the engines, Saqr flipped the ship and went full throttle. The Dropship hurtled forward on its new course at over 300 meters per second. Brigham, pinned into his seat, watching Saqr in disbelief as his arms danced around the helm like none of the g-forces effected him whatsoever.
    Warning messages flooded into Brigham’s console, however none critical.
    A proximity alarm flashed as the Clipper emerged from supercruise six hundred meters in front of them.
    Noticing the threat Saqr spun the ship so that he presented the underside of his ship to their hunter as passed.
    He hoped they wouldn’t be able to respond fast enough but he was wrong. Warspite was in the range of their port armament for approximately 9 seconds.
    “Ship under attack” the computer announced.
    “Shields down to 84%” Brigham read out, his adrenaline now going into overdrive but relieved that the Clipper was in the rearview mirror.
    “Can you plot the least time course that will take us as close to the primary and towards the Gas giant, I want to slow them down in the gravity wells” Saqr asked.
    “Course laid in” Brigham replied already predicting the request.
    “Out of mass lock, Frame Shift Drive powering up will be back in supercruise in eight seconds,” Saqr announced.
    Nine seconds later they were back traveling faster than light away from their mission, but more importantly away from the enemy.
    “ Saqr, they had a six-megawatt beam laser on us for less than ten seconds and they took nearly twenty percent of our shields,” Brigham said aloud after reviewing the logs.
    “So the goal is to last longer than a minute?” Saqr quipped back. Brigham glared at the back of his head.
    “Shields were at 91% by the time we got back into supercruise,” Brigham said aloud.
    “When we come out of super I’ll briefly redirect our excess in order to speed up regeneration, we can afford to lose some speed in the asteroid field.
    “Clipper has returned to supercruise and is following us now” Brigham announced
    Saqr and Brigham worked in silence as FNS Warspite barely kept a lead over its pursuer across the system.
    Saqr broke the silence. “Asteroid Belt, under one million miles, prepare for tactical”
    Brigham turned his attention to weapon control and reviewed his fire groups one final time.
    Immediately after dropping out of supercruise Brigham deployed an SOS beacon and powered up weapons. Saqr tried to gain as much ground as possible.
    Four minutes later the Clipper dropped out of Supercruise.
    Warspite headed further into the asteroid field with the Clipper slowly catching up to them.
    “Are those mining beams?” Brigham asked, pointing at some neon beams off in the distance.
    “Certainly looks like it” replied Saqr.
    “Hail them and ask for assistance, they wouldn’t be out here without an armed escort.”
    “Calling Mining vessels, this is Federation Dropship FNS Warspite. We are being pursued by an Imperial Clipper and require assistance.”
    The message was repeated several times with no response. Brigham's heart sank as he watched their icons on his navigation console change course.
    “They’re heading out of the asteroid field” He announced bitterly.
    “What did you expect, there's no profit in assisting us, but a boatload of risk” Saqr replied.
    “Clipper will be in range in under two minutes’ Brigham announced.
    “Point defense and armament slaved to my console, chaff redirected to yours”
    “Confirmed” replied Saqr.
    The Clipper wasted no time firing on its target the second it got into range. Its larger size meant it carried more ammo to waste.
    Saqr weaved through the asteroid field bringing the ship as close to each rock as he could. Point defense and Brigham's multi-cannons picked off any missiles still posing a threat while Saqr fired off bursts of chaff disrupting the Clippers target lock.
    Unfortunately, they couldn't dodge everything and after five minutes Warspite’s shields were in their low sixties and Brigham had hardly scratched the Clipper in return.
    “I’m going to need to redirect excess power to shields” Saqr announced.
    Brigham understood why, however, that excess had been keeping Warspite’s single top mounted three megawatt Pulse Laser from overheating.
    The drop in the excess meant he would have to switch to a burst firing solution despite the fact that the laser was the only thing that would bleed the Clippers shields dry. A Clipper without shields became a far more manageable opponent.
    Federation ships were built with reinforced hulls, while Imperial ships relied on higher capacity shields. The Clipper had over thirty percent more shields than them. But once it was gone they could go on the offensive. Trouble was they lacked the firepower to saturate those defenses.
    “I have an idea” Brigham announced. His hands danced across his console plotting a new course for Saqr and loading in over fifty new targets for his missiles.
    “Try and stick to that new course as close as you can,” Brigham said.
    “You can no longer call me the reckless one!” said Saqr.
    “Why?”
    “Blowing up asteroids in an asteroid belt is item number two on the list of things only dumb pilots do”
    “Whats number one?” Brigham inquired.
    “Number one is accidentally jettisoning your cargo when opening your cargo hatch”
    Brigham’s laughter was cut short by another missile getting past his point defense.
    “Adjusting for new course”
    Brigham had pre-programmed in all of his targets so he could turn his attention back to the Clipper.
    “Missile separation” announced the computer.
    He smiled to himself as he saw the first asteroid shower the Clipper in debris, its shields glowing bright blue with each impact.
    The Dropship continued to weave in and out of rocks, missiles spewing from its launchers while multi-cannons and point defense lasers picked off incoming missiles.
    Brigham took his shots at the Clipper when he could but without the excess power available it was overheating quickly.
    He grinned to himself, after ten minutes of this, the Clipper was showing signs of damage. It was now spending more time dodging their attacks than firing.
    “Opportunity up ahead” Saqr announced.
    Brigham switch to his navigational console. About 65 miles ahead was a dense sphere of rocks. A perfect kill zone.
    “Do it, Clipper’s shields are around thirty percent,” he replied.
    Saqr redirected power to engines and the Dropship lurched ahead, this fight was about to come to a close.
    “Fifty miles” Saqr announced. Brigham worked frantically to fight off incoming missiles and load up the upcoming targets.
    “Shields recovered to seventy-four percent” Brigham announced.
    “Twenty-five”
    “Shields now at seventy-eight”
    “Ten”
    “All power redirected to Shields and weapons” announced Saqr.
    Much to their opponents surprise, its target reached its an arbitrary point in space and flipped around nose facing them and started to strafe left.
    Two missile racks, two multi-cannons, and one large pulse laser illuminated the space between the two ships.
    Before the Clipper could bring both wings of its weapons to bear on the Dropship it moved behind an asteroid. Missiles continued to stream out from the Dropship’s direction but they were not heading towards the Clipper.
    Two medium sized Asteroids exploded showering the Clipper with shrapnel. The sudden change of direction had slowed the Clipper down and was now unable to dodge the onslaught of debris.
    Saqr brought Warspite out of hiding and continued to fire. The Clipper whose giant lasers were situated on each wing was able to return fire with only one. It attempted to angle itself but Warspite had disappeared again.
    “Shields down to sixty-eight,“Clipper down to forty”” Brigham called out. He smiled, they were winning.
    Warspite continued its run keeping out of range of as much of the Clippers armament as it could.
    By the time they had traveled in a full circle both ships were showing serious signs of damage.
    “Clipper shields are failing” Brigham announced.
    “So are ours through”
    “Perfect!” Saqr sang out.
    “Attack run laid in” announced Brigham
    They shot out from their hiding spot approaching the Clipper from its lasers blind spot. However, they were still in the range of its missiles which reacted automatically.
    Point defense and multi-cannons did their best to fight them off but could only do so much as the Dropship charged ahead.
    The Clipper tried to yaw to bring its main turrets to bear but Saqr was the better pilot, effortlessly keeping them in its blind spot, still the Clippers missiles bore in.
    Warspite rocked violently and, smoke filled the cockpit the shield failed and the ship started to creak under the onslaught. Brigham looked up at a loud sound and saw that the canopy had cracked, but had not breached.
    Mere seconds later the Clippers shields also failed and Saqr put all directional energy into his vertical thrusters. Warspite’s nose was mere meters from the bottom of the clipper, weapons pouring damaged into the hull as they traveled down the length of the ship.
    They passed out of the firing arc of the missiles and Brigham breathed a sigh of relief as Warspite was granted a temporary reprieve.
    The Clipper’s hull buckled under the constant fire from Warspite.
    Then as they reached the end of the ship Saqr swung the ship upward putting them back in the firing arc of the Clippers two beam lasers but also in the direct firing line of the Clippers four engines.
    The Imperial Clippers four engines where one by one destroyed by the Dropship. Leaving it now floating uncontrollably behind enemy lines.
    FNS Warspite, now the victor, was now able to carry on with its mission.

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