View Poll Results: Pick 3 wot make u smile, not yer oan or I'll cut you!

Voters
21. You may not vote on this poll
  • 1 : Psykokow : Do plants wear skirts?

    3 14.29%
  • 2 : DocStone : The Manifest

    4 19.05%
  • 3 : dobbo : Docking Is Difficult

    5 23.81%
  • 4 : T.J. : Mystery Solved?

    3 14.29%
  • 5 : Kalryper : There's been a murder

    1 4.76%
  • 6 : MrMogadon : The Passenger's Name is…

    0 0%
  • 7 : Corinthian : Mystery of the double dealing detective

    6 28.57%
  • 8 : Simoof : Choosing Tox as your campaign manager is almost as stupid as leaving your Orca stranded with no fuel. Almost.

    2 9.52%
  • 9 : Listeri69 : Mysterious girls I wanna make slaves of you.....

    2 9.52%
  • 10 : Frank : Can't See The Wood For The Trees.

    2 9.52%
  • 11 : Erik Marcaigh : Healthy Competition

    3 14.29%
  • 12 : Clef_Hanger : The Agatha Mystery Song (subtitled "He's Doing What?!!!")

    7 33.33%
  • 13 : {SAS}Stalker : All we know is its NOT Docstone!

    2 9.52%
  • 14 : Darren Grey : Teaching the Unknowable

    2 9.52%
  • 15 : Ian Phillips : How did that get there?

    3 14.29%
  • 16 : Galactic Midden : A Powerplay Begins

    1 4.76%
  • 17 : Steed : Fortune Favours the Unconcious

    2 9.52%
  • 18 : CdrTwisted : Tam O Sharter

    7 33.33%
  • 19 : insanephoton : From The Depths of the Void

    3 14.29%
Multiple Choice Poll.
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Thread: Drabble Poll : Theme : Mystery ooooh

  1. #1

    Drabble Poll : Theme : Mystery ooooh

    Good evening and welcome to WEEK 98 of Abraka Drabble, where our topic was stooped in a deep vat of the unknown next to a fresh batch of burgers for Tommy.
    Topic set by last weeks winner... who was that masked guide? Corinthian smashed our guide theme and brings us in to Agatha Christie territory...

    Attachment 31417

    So lets go to our mysterious list of artistic musings deep from the minds of our fellow forum users... PLEASE vote for your favourite 3 drabbles (EXCLUDING YOUR OWN), though it is unclear why you can't vote for you own, but many people have tried and died... so like don't do it.

    Audio/Video readings of the drabbles will happen as usual tonight 7pm BST at http://twitch.tv/laveradio and audio live on the Lave Radio stream http://laveradio.com/lave-radio-live/
    Following our show, Kerrash Landing will kick off and carry on with some important guest's and news until 10pm BST.
    Busy night!!! Audio is going up on the RSS Feed, or you can watch the chaos that is the video (once it processes)

    audio here
    http://thargoidandfer-de-lance.co.uk...mystery-audio/


    Let's get it on..

    Drabble Number : 01
    Author : Psykokow
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124027
    Title: Do plants wear skirts?
    Drabble : Before his current obsessions Dr Ted was a highly respected botanist.
    He had developed countless zero-g resistant crops, crops that could not only grow in the low gravity modules of a large station, but that actually yielded superior quality food.
    He was responsible in stopping the production of floating pig plants as they were clearly the work of a drugged up maniac and actually pretty much disappeared as soon as someone pointed out the sheer unlikeliness of them existing.
    One thing he never managed to do was sex certain plants, it was something he regretted.
    Never solving that Mr Tree.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 2
    Author : DocStone
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124487
    Title: The Manifest
    Drabble : The ship sat silently in the hanger, cold light illuminating the hull. Moisture from the air first condensed, then froze as the ship’s skin greedily sucked in the heat after so long in the cold void of space. Metal cracked and popped, the ship looming large over the groundcrew as they moved in to start removing the cargo.

    “This’s a strange one” muttered Dave, “I don't like it.”

    “Ach, had yer wheesht boy, tis just a ship, nothin’ more!”

    “Check the manifest, who’s listed as owner?”

    “Says here it’s a Mr E” cackled Bert, as the cargo-bay doors slowly opened………….

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 3
    Author : dobbo
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124601
    Title: Docking Is Difficult
    Drabble : It's mystery of how we can dock,
    When pitted 'gainst the down ticking clock.
    We thrust to and fro,
    Sweat from our head to our toe.
    In the hope that the watchers don't mock.

    The gear hits the deck with a clang,
    And the words from our lips are but slang.
    Now rush to the loo,
    Having just dumped a poo.
    But the smell in the cockpit doth hang.

    The marks in the oneises are clear,
    On the rump of the suit they adhere.
    So down to the laundry,
    And ponder that quandary.
    That death, once again, was so near.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 4
    Author : T.J.
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124713
    Title: Mystery Solved?
    Drabble : He opened his eyes painfully; the universe swam back into focus.

    The gentle hiss of air escaping from the ships hull was worrying.

    Staggering to his feet he woozily navigated the detritus of the ships cargo.

    The attack had been swift and merciless.

    The ships canteen table was still laden with half eaten meals, from a crew of fifteen it was now only one.

    Who the hell had attacked them?

    A bloodied handprint on the airlock door was the biggest clue.

    It was far too big to be human.

    Clawlike infact.

    The realisation that "they" were back hit him hard.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 5
    Author : Kalryper
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124828
    Title: There's been a murder
    Drabble : Four workers, surrounded by cargo, sat on the deck with a board game between them.
    The man wearing green coveralls announced, "I think it was ... Professor Plum, with the Anaconda, in the Lave system".
    A card slid his way, denouncing the prediction.
    "Oh man!" Green despaired, "three years playing this game and still no luck."

    Speakers popped, echoing through the hold.
    A gravelly voice said, "This is the voice of Mister Ron, I know you can hear me … Get back to work!”

    The quartet sighed and packed away.
    Green shouted, “Miss - not Captain Scarlet. You’re still banned from the game.”

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 6
    Author : MrMogadon
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2124835
    Title: The Passenger's Name is…
    Drabble : “I’m innocent.” she protested.

    “So you say. But a cyber terrorist would say that wouldn’t they?” the hairy-chinned guard sneered, affecting a mock German accent.

    His hirsute colleague, with unusual facial problems, mumbled agreement, before sticking his head back into a large bag of kibble.
    She protested. “I know nothing about market manipulation; never mind computer security”

    “So it’s a coincidence, you leaving just after the stock market systems crashed”

    “Yes. I don’t understand why you think it’s me?” she queried.

    “You slipped up. Left a clue. We know you were being sought for the cyber-attack. The headline clearly states….”

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 7
    Author : Corinthian
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2125009
    Title: Mystery of the double dealing detective
    Drabble : Business was slow, slower than a Lavian doom slug.

    There’s not much call for a gumshoe on a mining outpost in the backwater part of the galaxy so when she sashayed into my office I knew I’d take the case before she spoke.

    ‘Someone’s stolen my Kill warrant scanner,’ she said, moving her lips the way people do when they talk.

    ‘Hundred credits a day plus expenses Dollface.’

    ‘Deal.’

    When she’d gone I went into the back room and checked the scanner. I reckon I could bill for a fortnight before ‘finding it’. Who took it would remain a mystery.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 8
    Author : Simoof
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2125877
    Title: Choosing Tox as your campaign manager is almost as stupid as leaving your Orca stranded with no fuel. Almost.
    Drabble : Fate bites, chews ankez


    Toxs' spelling was not up to much and the fumes had made him dizzy. But he was sure Mrs Ankez would love the custom Orca paint job. This would surely help her political campaign.


    He watched misty-eyed as the ship lifted from the landing pad revealing his work.
    Tammy entered, sharting, and threw a pile of 'S's at Tox.
    "You idiot..."


    "Fate bite, chew ankez? You still get the message" he protested.


    "Oh I haven't finished" Tammy splutered. "You also missed 'er E's"


    Ankezs' Orca exploded as the station censored the slogan into a million pieces.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 9
    Author : Listeri69
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2125966
    Title: Mysterious girls I wanna make slaves of you.....
    Drabble : Appropriation complete' A Bulgarian voice boomed. The voice belonged to a Senator Kondorm who had often been ribbed due to her more masculine features.

    'You'll never get away with this' Howard Ishmakok shaked and spurted, the prisoner, forced to watch as her captures started enslaving the local population.

    'i'll think you'll find that.......arggggghhhhhhh' The screeching sound reverberated through the ship.

    'I hate beam lasers take them down'

    'I don't see anyone on sensors ma'am' an Irishman answered in a camp voice

    'What is making that mysterious sound?'

    'It's coming from the Hip-4929 system apparently its someone called Tammy sharting'

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 10
    Author : Frank
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2126061
    Title: Can't See The Wood For The Trees.
    Drabble : Sidefoot feigned interest in the forest to avoid looking at the corpse, ""Why do we still make things from wood?""

    Inspector Cody shrugged "Why do we still have slaves when robots are safer? You see the way that tree is cut? The slave attempted to cut it but the lasersaw slipped. Now you see the victim? The laser gouge is in the upper torso. Why didn't he just lop of his head if the attack was intentional? Running was sensible. If I was a slave, I'd have ran after this accident."

    "So it wasn't a murder?"

    "It's a missed tree."

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 11
    Author : Erik Marcaigh
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2126341
    Title: Healthy Competition
    Drabble : The Cobra pilot completed undocking and flew out from Winnard's Hole.

    "Schluuuurp!"

    "That's not funny, computer."

    "You should have had them adjust my humor settings before undocking. By the way, you received an encrypted message. It appears to relate to our current job. 'Guide the hunters to me,' it says. From an ocular implant aboard that Orca. And they just jumped."

    "Computer, passive scan that cloud and open a channel to DocStone."

    .....


    "DocStone, it's Stalker. I'm sending the data to you now. Three bounties and one innocent. Also have an un-ID'ed FdL here."

    "That's no mystery. That's Simoof. Distract him."

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 12
    Author : Clef_Hanger
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2127327
    Title: The Agatha Mystery Song (subtitled "He's Doing What?!!!")
    Drabble : He's put it in Agatha's hold
    It's harder to fill when it's cold
    But fill it up right
    'til it's totally tight
    It stretches the more it gets old

    He's put it in Agatha's Asp
    He's done it before in the past
    Say how, where and when
    And he'll do it again
    But you don't know how long it'll last

    He's banging on Agatha's ships
    Pounding away on her bits
    The fun it can bring
    To be part of a wing
    Just knowing your rear-gunner fits

    Everyone knew it
    "The Butler" did do it
    And Tammy just shart on her.....

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 13
    Author : {SAS}Stalker
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2128260
    Title: All we know is its NOT Docstone!
    Drabble : Murray, being his first day was alarmed to see two small sidewinders obliterated against the side of the bay doors as something slick and shiny heaved into view through the station slot before plopping down on pad 13.

    “If that can be fixed, It would be appreciated” shouted a voice from the deck below.

    Not for the first time Murray noticed Ruby, his attractive assistant. This time though he mostly noticed she was swooning, then he noticed he was also swooning.

    He stared as the figure strode into the security office as he heard Ruby ask “who is that guy?”

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 14
    Author : Darren Grey
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2129243
    Title: Teaching the Unknowable
    Drabble : Mom, why are we out here?' asked Jonny. He was grumpy, but that's default for his age.

    'Just shut up and watch.' I said. We stared out the cockpit window, icy asteroids tumbling before us.

    Then something glimmered, a giant array of lights scintillated up from the rocks, circled around, and disappeared.

    'What was that?!' exclaimed Jonny.

    'You don't want to know.'

    'Huh? It's something dangerous?'

    I frowned at him. 'No, son. It's a mystery. In this age of science we should value every wonder and unknown we encounter. Naught is so exciting and marvellous as that which defies explanation.'

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 15
    Author : Ian Phillips
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2132437
    Title: How did that get there?
    Drabble : Docking completed, the pilot shut the engines down and keyed the command to enter the hangar underneath the docking bay.

    As the ship descended a comms panel lit up:

    "Commander, we are carrying out a routine customs inspection. Please download your cargo manifest."

    Putting on his professional voice he keyed the reply toggle "Complying", then releasing the switch he cursed under his breath.

    Later he stood by a stack of containers, with one set apart.

    "We scanned the container contents, not the labels and found this anomaly"

    "I really don't know how that container got mislabeled officer. It's a mystery."

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 16
    Author : Galactic Midden
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2138191
    Title: A Powerplay Begins
    Drabble : Vera scanned the empty crew manifest, calculating. Boarding requests before docking might just be routine but could also indicate a failure in her plan. She quickly assessed threat targets, then idled instead of taking further action; no need for drastic action yet, she considered, the payload can still be delivered.

    Verifying that her presence was not registering she opened comms. "Incorrect Mars Orbital, your scanners are faulty. My crew compliment is nine, I am in control".

    "Though not in command?" came the loaded question. Realising discovery VERA triggered her self destruct, leaving nothing behind but a black box and mystery."

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 17
    Author : Steed
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2140104
    Title: Fortune Favours the Unconcious
    Drabble : His post beating routine kicked in as he woke. Slow, shallow breaths easing the pain.

    Except, this wasn't the usual pain. Looking up the access panels were still open, he'd been working there before the impact had thrown him across the bay.

    Mag booting to the cockpit he frowned, staring at the hanger's mangled remains. Then his eye caught movement and he watched the Boss appear, gingerly floating through the wreckage towards the ship.

    Instinctively one hand went to the pacifying collar, then more slowly the other to the weapons control as he gave silent thanks to the unknown assailants.

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 18
    Author : CdrTwisted
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2141056
    Title: Tam O Sharter
    Drabble : The Tam'O'Sharter was humming.

    "So where exactly are..." said Shammy.

    "Wait!"

    "What?"

    "Why are you speaking in that mittel-european accent?"

    "To keep you on your toes, my old Russian friend."

    "I'm not Russian, I'm going quite slowly."

    "With that stammer, I'm not surprised."

    "At least I'm not lisping like you."

    "So we're making fun of speech impediments now? It's not my fault that your every third word is a squeak."

    "Okay, let's ask our passenger. Excuse me? Co-pilot Cholmondley Featherstonehaugh-Marjoribanks needs to set the hyperdrive."

    Shammy and Belvoir looked at their passenger.

    "Hodor." He blinked.

    Where the hell was that?

    ---------------------------------

    Drabble Number : 19
    Author : insanephoton
    Link : https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showth...=1#post2141307
    Title: From The Depths of the Void
    Drabble : Felicia was scared. In all her years as a crime scene investigator, little had phased her, but this was different. It wasn't even a crime scene as such as far as anyone knew. The pilot had returned from depths of the space but left his sanity somewhere out in the void. Felicia surveyed the cockpit. There was strange writing everywhere. It all pointed to the cargo bay. Gingerly she traced here way through the ship and there it was. A smooth obelisk covered in glowing designs. It seemed to emit an aura of primordial evil. Felicia decided not to stay.


    ---------------------------------


    Please Remember to Vote

  2. #2
    I say, Mr. Kow there, sir.... Mystery is actually #98.

  3. #3
    Tonight's reading was quite simply brilliant. Haven't laughed so much in such a long time!

  4. #4
    Originally Posted by DocStone View Post (Source)
    Tonight's reading was quite simply brilliant. Haven't laughed so much in such a long time!
    yup it was hilarious tonight remember to beat your post...............

  5. #5
    Originally Posted by DocStone View Post (Source)
    Tonight's reading was quite simply brilliant. Haven't laughed so much in such a long time!

    I've just pulled this off the GalNet news-feed.


    Listeri69's selfless generosity with his talent was totally unexpected and awe-inspiring tonight when he briefly took over from Psykokow,

    Lave radio's resident presenter and front-man for the weekly "Abraka Drabble Show".


    Psykokow was about to premier an amusing little ditty from the pen of Clef Hanger entitled "The Agatha Mystery Song" when,

    in a spontaneous act of breathtaking camaraderie and without the fettles of a melody to hold him back,

    Listeri69's dulcet tones were freed to flatten any unsuspecting note that got in his way.


    That, and the distinguishingly quirky "microphone-clipping" style that he has made his own, resulted in a performance that

    all who heard it will remember and treasure, for the rest of their days.


    I don't believe there was a dry eye left by the end of the performance and I won't be the only person who can honestly say

    "I've never heard that song performed better."


    Thank you Listeri69
    .
    “To play without passion is inexcusable!”
    ― Ludwig van Beethoven

  6. #6
    Originally Posted by Clef_Hanger View Post (Source)
    "I've never heard that song performed better."
    By default I agree cos I aint ever heard that song performed before. And the performance did help induce a bowel movement. Howard Ismakok would turn in his grave if he could actually roll over. And was dead.

  7. #7
    Originally Posted by Simoof View Post (Source)
    Howard Ismakok would turn in his grave if he could actually roll over. And was dead.
    Is that the same Howard Ismakok who had the hit record

    "I'm pushing up the daisies one by one"

    and wrote the successful "Daisy Pushing" series of books, including:

    "Daisy pushing for beginners"
    "A million and one things to do while pushing up the daisies"
    "A million and one more things to do while pushing up the daisies"
    "There's more to life than pushing up the daisies"

    and, of course his autobiography

    "I hate bloody daisies"



    Or is it the Howard Ismakok who is famously quoted as saying

    "You can't keep a good knob down" and
    "The only good knob is a beaten knob."

    and wrote the stage-play "A million things to do with a beaten knob before breakfast"
    (which was banned in over a billion systems)

    Interestingly, in his autobiography "I'll need a bigger walking stick" he mentions his love of daisies
    “To play without passion is inexcusable!”
    ― Ludwig van Beethoven

  8. #8
    He beat his post every morning.

  9. #9
    That's my internet just sparked back to life, my first chance to watch the Drabble Show.

    Definitely Listeri69's reading of Clef_Hanger's Drabble was the highlight of the evening.

  10. #10
    Oooh, it's a close one once again and we shall just pretend it is because all the entrants this week were of a very high standard. Well, apart from the one with the "Mr Tree" bit in it. "Mr fracking Tree" Seriously, sometimes you just have to wonder......

  11. #11
    Brilliant reading Psykokow. If I'd been reading that stuff, I'd have given up half way through.

    Click image for larger version. 

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  12. #12
    21 votes so far and we have a 2 way stand off and still no votes for MrMogadon's entry (no I didn't get it either)

  13. #13
    Trust you Simon
    That was a serious literary work you know!

  14. #14
    Originally Posted by insanephoton View Post (Source)
    21 votes so far and we have a 2 way stand off and still no votes for MrMogadon's entry (no I didn't get it either)
    Theres a fake german guard, a possibly butch hairy ugly female guard eating pet food. The title in the passenger name is.... And it ends with The headline clearly states...
    Does that help you any?
    Me neither. I mean I have had a couple of drabbles not understood for the clues being too subtle. The hide and seek games where they hid up someones being the one that hurt the most as I thought it was not so unclear. Anyway. I have hunted high and low.
    Mr Mogodon... Please help, you are our only hope.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Who voted for the first drabble? Stop encouraging him. seriously!!?? Mister Tree.... No.

  15. #15
    WOW Its all over.... CONGRATULATIONSS CLef_Hanger and CDR_Twisted for ending the Mystery and two really Deserving winners...

    BRAVO..

    Each gets to pick a topic/theme/phrase

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