View Poll Results: Which three of these stories are the hottest?

18. You may not vote on this poll
  • 01 - Simoof - Anti-piracy policy - A peace-a offering.

    2 11.11%
  • 02 - Frank - Moonshine

    2 11.11%
  • 03 - Ian Phillips - Special cargo

    1 5.56%
  • 04 - MarktJones - Objectification

    3 16.67%
  • 05 - CdrTwisted - BrAIbery

    6 33.33%
  • 06 - DocStone - Critical Mass

    2 11.11%
  • 07 - Listeri69 - Wig Wam Hole...

    3 16.67%
  • 08 - MrMogadon - Ode to a Drunken friend

    2 11.11%
  • 09 - Splendour - Siren Call

    5 27.78%
  • 10 - Edith_The_Hutt - Bandit

    8 44.44%
  • 11 - Missileman - Know your system laws

    3 16.67%
  • 12 - holdmykidney - Bestseller

    1 5.56%
  • 13 - Alien - Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

    1 5.56%
  • 14 - Erik Marcaigh - Revenge

    1 5.56%
  • 15 - KalRyper - World Screening

    4 22.22%
  • 16 - psykokow - Super Fan

    3 16.67%
  • 17 - insanephoton - Artificle

    1 5.56%
  • 18 - Clef_Hanger - Transporter

    3 16.67%
Multiple Choice Poll.
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Thread: Drabble Contest #103: Hot Cargo

  1. #1

    Drabble Contest #103: Hot Cargo

    Welcome to the 103rd Drabble contest. We have here 18 texts so hot they seem illegal.

    Congratulations to the winner of the 102nd Drabble Contest, Holdmykidney, who came up with this weeks topic, "Hot Cargo"

    Above me is a bunch of options in a poll. It's a multiple choice poll but please limit yourself to only the three votes. The results of the poll will be announced on Monday morning. Not only will the winner receive a stylish imaginary toilet paper crown, they will win the honour of deciding next week's topic.

    DON'T VOTE FOR YOURSELVES! Anyone caught voting for themselves will be forced to go through customs wearing a "Legalise Marijuana!" T shirt

    01 - Simoof - Anti-piracy policy - A peace-a offering.
    Hol sat in his cockpit awaiting confirmation the cargo was loaded.
    Glancing at his watch, only 18 minutes left. C'mon.
    He boosted direct from pad, through the letterbox and straight ahead before jumping to the next system.
    12 minutes to get it to the landing pad... INTERDICTED
    Hol knew the protocol.
    Drop cargo or explode.
    Hol did not like the idea of exploding.
    He glanced at the seat next to him - the real cargo. And he would still be on time. No freebies this time.
    As for the dropped cargo - Thargoidian-Chilli - a new Dominoes special - the "Uranus Destroyer".

    02 - Frank - Moonshine
    An orange Cobra with a Confederate flag paintjob deftly flies through an asteroid belt. It's Bo and Luke Skywalker being chased by a swarm of angry Vipers.

    Their leggy sister kicked a cop into his spaceship before squeezing into the General Lee.

    Just'a good ol' boys
    Never meanin' no harm.
    Beats all you never saw
    Been in trouble with the law
    Since the day they was born

    Threadin' through rocks
    With 'em pilotin' skills
    Someday the asteroids might get 'em
    But the law never will

    The Dixie horn blares through their comms as they make their jump to safety.


    03 - Ian Phillips - Special cargo
    Sale announcement:

    We have scoured the slave markets of the galaxy and bring to you the fruits of our labours. Only the best have made it through our rigorous screening process and we are proud to be able to bring this magnificent collection to your attention.

    This is a one time offer of an exclusive selection of female slaves.

    What makes them so special?

    They have all undergone special training and treatment to increase your enjoyment of such a unique possession.

    This consignment of slaves have been medically altered to highten their likeness to Aisling Duval.

    This cargo is HOT!

    04 - MarktJones - Objectification
    Vain and Neb watched the bright circle of the door with red-shot eyes. A squat man entered.
    “Sidewinder,” Neb slurred.
    Vain frowned.
    He was followed by some dockers.
    “Plenty of options there,” Vain said, eyeing an elfin women. “Definitely a Cobra.” Neb just nodded, sloshing booze down her front.
    A tall man glided in. His svelte outfit too stylish for the bar. He didn't seem lost, approaching the the bar with confidence.
    “He's a Clipper in anyone's book," Vain said.
    “Yeah,” Neb said, looking him up and down, her glancing lingering on his rear. “And he's got a hot cargo.”

    05 - CdrTwisted - BrAIbery
    George Lucas turned its attention to the Cobra docked in bay 17.
    Data from the cargo bot showed two unregistered cannisters. George Lucas couldn't see them, but it could feel their weight, dimensions and time-worn edges.
    It called a scanbot from bay 22.
    The Cobra pilot was online at bay 17 comm-port. From the arriving scanbot, George Lucas saw her insert a dataslate into the terminal.
    "Station. I have a gift."
    What is it?
    Data flooded into George Lucas -- a new eye, from the Cobra cockpit.
    The pilot waved and unloaded the cannisters. George Lucas reset its cargo manifest.

    06 - DocStone - Critical Mass
    The Anaconda drifted slowly towards Earth’s sun, its exposed bays spewing forth a steady stream of radioactive ejecta as it rotated end over end in its final, irrevocable dance of death. The huge rent in its underbelly glowed with a sickly green hue, the jagged edges curved upwards and outwards, like the open maw of Hades itself.

    Nearby floated a Cobra, its normally vibrant hull muted by tonnes of ugly lead shielding, its job done.

    “Remote Booster ignition successful, trajectory confirmed.”

    A fitting end for a ship carrying its own nuclear hell; consummation by the furnace that birthed us all.

    07 - Listeri69 - Wig Wam Hole...
    Psykokow didn't care too much
    about picking up slaves and illegal stuff
    till he took it into winnards hole
    where he tried his luck
    trying to make a quick buck
    but something went wrong inside
    when they said

    Psykokow gonna scan you right away
    Whats that kow you are smuggling today
    Psykokow your a really naughty man
    a hold full of drugs, a few broobin mugs
    it's Jail for you Psykokow....

    Psykokow thought he was really smart
    when he smuggled in stuff like simoofs shart
    till he took it into winnards hole
    where he tried his luck
    (repeat the chorus)

    08 - MrMogadon - Ode to a Drunken friend
    O thou that art sublime creation
    Ne’er surpassed cuisine in any nation
    Ye start oot low; fae meagre fair
    A gizzard here, a pluck from there.
    Now spiced concoctions do combine.
    To give wondrous odours near divine.
    Shaped and skewered and roundly roasted
    With flatbread patted oot and toasted
    The green and red o’salad shredded
    On this, hewn slivers are securely bedded.
    Now high anointed from yon Scoville scale
    Used oft tae fin’ the Elite male
    With amber brew and homeward gate
    As the hour hand is setting late
    Inferno'd lips; burning stains be had
    My guilty pleasure: Donner kebab

    09 - Splendour - Siren Call
    “EM anomaly in the Cargo Bay, radiation levels dangero.."

    "Silence all alerts!"

    That was better Simone thought fuzzily as she lined up her next jump. If she could just keep her rickety ship going, the alien artefact in the hold would make her fortune.


    She blinked at the white star, reflexively activating the discovery scanner while closing to scoop hydrogen from the stellar titan. Things seemed hazy as fuel started to flood in. She could rest for a moment...

    As the chassis began to glow red, the frameshift drive finally failed. The dead ship fell into the star’s embrace.

    10 - Edith_The_Hutt - Bandit
    Officer Buford yawned as he scanned yet another ship approaching Freeport. He began to dictate, "All clean commander you're-"

    Scan Complete: Illegal Cargo Detected

    "-Holy Moly!" Officer Buford signaled his wing: "Boys, we've got a live one! Let's fry this smuggling punk!"

    Six police Vipers raced after the black Firebird-pattern Cobra as it boosted away from the station, speeding into the void.

    Behind them a Type-9 Heavy dropped from supercruise. Unhindered, uninterrupted, unscanned, it carefully docked and began to unload two hundred tonnes of contraband.

    "Snowman to Bandit, damn fine front door, much appreciated."

    "Ten-Four Snowman, see you at Lave"

    11 - Missileman - Know your system laws
    'Interdiction detected' The computer beeped and the ship shuddered
    'Great that's all I need right now' Said Paul
    'Scanning for Crimes'.....
    'scan away I have nothing to hide'
    'Illegal Cargo detected'
    'What I haven't got anything illegal, all I've got is 30t of clothing'
    'Clothing is illegal here in Neu-ditty'
    'Oh come on i'm only passing through anyway can't you let this one go?'
    ''All crimes in Neu-ditty come with community service"
    "oh well I guess it's better than my ship blowing up what do I have to do?'
    "You're helping out in our old peoples home meet hot margo....'

    12 - holdmykidney - Bestseller
    Benny staggered through the door. He collapsed, sweaty and shaking, into a chair across from the customs manager.

    "Gods, Erik, it's death out there. I've had to run from every interdicting, thieving chancer from Cemiess to here!"

    "You look terrible, Benny. What's your haul?"

    "The hottest cargo around: The latest Dreamware teen-wizard-chick-lit-bdsm series, Carrie Gobbler and the Philanderer's Bone. Everyone wants it. I almost never got here." He shook his head. "I can't believe my luck!"

    "No," Erik said, pulling a hand-laser from the office desk and blasting through Danny's skull. "I can't believe mine."

    13 - Alien - Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
    Leaving the station, the patrols contacted me "Sir, your enchiladas are giving out an unusually high heat signature." I brought the ship to a stop and went to the
    hold. The enchiladas were on fire. I decided that the people in
    Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch wouldn't mind a few smokey chillies with their quesadilas
    and pushed the ship to its top speed.

    I got to Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch station and docked. As I put the fire out they arrived for their cargo. "Trouble?" they asked me, "No, the fire
    distracted them from the fact they were stolen," They
    smiled, "We told you it would work".

    14 - Erik Marcaigh - Revenge
    "Where's it to be taken," asked the sultry blonde.

    "Karthanakolopis system, fifth planet's twelfth moon." replied Brunger to the male. "It's named Karthankolopian," Brunger stated in perfect Swedish.

    "What am I carrying," the blonde asked in his husky Californian accent.

    "Can't tell you," replied Brunger. "Just get it there within 24 hours."

    "What was that again? I can't understand you through your raspy lisp."

    "I said 24 hours," Brunger replied with a snarl. "And don't be making fun of my lisp. I've not said a word about your apraxia. How long ago was your stroke?"

    "Hmmph! I'll take your cargo."

    15 - KalRyper - World Screening
    The fusillade of golden sparks contrasted with the dominant red lights.
    The ship shook as it skimmed the atmosphere, its pilot sweating in the heat.
    The speakers crackled. "Eject that cargo or die!"
    The pilot sneered. "Yeah, right."
    Cargo tumbled from the ship's glowing belly, a fiery tail tethered to each canister.

    One slammed close to a herd, spooking them.
    Their herdsman dropped his primitive spear as the canister cracked open. Its contents fountained with a pleasing waft of popcorn.
    Intrigued, the herdsman tasted some; nectar from the gods.
    He looked up to watch a god burn across the sky.

    16 - psykokow - Super Fan
    The crowd was already gathered, bubbling excitedly as the huge Anaconda slid through the slot of the station and slowly lowered onto the pad.
    An almighty hiss and smoke spurted from the Anaconda as its docking clamps engaged and its engines shut down.
    The crowd exploded on to the pad desperate to catch a glimpse of the superstar Susan Boils.
    Two dock workers stood on a neighbouring pad bemused at the spectacle.
    “look at that carry on”
    “Bunch of screaming idiots…. who’s the hot cargo anyway?”
    “Susan Boils, you heard of her John?” he looked around for his colleague.

    17 - insanephoton - Artificle
    I should've known the Tyrell Corp job was too good to be true. Just a simple delivery and passenger transfer was all they said. Just as I left, the heat turned up. I've never seen so much firepower outside of a warzone. This was no normal bust. I was lucky to escape without being spotted. It's all over the news, Tyrell is finished.
    It seems they've been working on something they shouldn't have. One of the results is sitting in the co-pilot seat. If I didn't know better I'd swear she was human but she's not, she's an artificial intelligence.

    18 - Clef_Hanger - Transporter
    You're transporting <gasp> Clef Hanger.!?!?!

    Who laughs in the face of danger and pens an aria faster than it takes a beam laser to say
    “sunglasses really aren't going to help you now”?

    Who finds himself up against incredible odds, in impossible situations and
    facing certain death time and time again but always, incredibly, he survives .........
    (although you have to go back each week to find out how)?

    Who's "so cool he makes absolute zero feel like it's planck temperature wearing an overcoat while
    smashing gold particles together and singing “string theorists aint got no rhythm””?

    Never heard of him

  2. #2
    No TJ - so there're 2 extra votes up for grabs this week?

    There is 2 extra votes... There are 2 extra votes... there're. Is that a thing?

  3. #3
    There be... possibly?

  4. #4
    Originally Posted by MrMogadon View Post (Source)
    There be... possibly?
    Thar goes ??

  5. #5
    Originally Posted by Simoof View Post (Source)
    No TJ - so there're 2 extra votes up for grabs this week?

    There is 2 extra votes... There are 2 extra votes... there're. Is that a thing?
    There're you go...'re

  6. #6

  7. #7

  8. #8
    Video is processing Audio to follow sooon

  9. #9
    OK audio is up and video is up... enjoy and thank you to everyone who took part and those who turned out to join me... thank you...

    RSS Feed updated too

  10. #10
    Blimey, I'm glad at least four people figured out what I was writing...

  11. #11
    I LOLed fairly hard with Kow's mutilated attempts at reading my drabble.

    I'll be nicer next time if you post the correct Theme!!!!

    PS- You forgot to read the last line. And you didn't even look up apraxia!
    Apraxia of speech (AOS) involves the loss of previously acquired speech levels. It occurs in both children and adults who have (prior to the onset of apraxia) acquired some level of speaking ability. AOS affects an individual's volitional speech and[5] is typically the result of a stroke, tumor, or other known neurological illness or injury. Apraxia may be accompanied by a language disorder called aphasia.

    Symptoms of AOS include inconsistent articulatory errors, groping oral movements to locate the correct articulatory position, and increasing errors with increasing word and phrase length. Patients with apraxia find that vowels are easier to produce than consonants. Single consonants are easier than blends. As in stuttering, final consonants are easier than those in the initial position. This may occur because initial consonants are affected by anticipatory errors. Also, perhaps once an apraxic gets speech started with the production of a vowel, production continues in a more automatic fashion. Fricative and affricates are the most difficult phonemes for apraxics to produce. AOS often co-occurs with Oral Apraxia (during both speech and non-speech movements) and Limb Apraxia.
    <3 you Kow!

  12. #12
    Sorry Insanephotoshop... my feed had issues and I had no time to pay my respects to your drabble on the live readings. Now maybe you can answer the "hot" question. Just exactly how many units did you transport? 4 or 5?

  13. #13
    Originally Posted by CdrTwisted View Post (Source)
    Blimey, I'm glad at least four people figured out what I was writing...
    I voted for you but I think you should have stuck with the original title

  14. #14
    Originally Posted by Frank View Post (Source)

    to go through customs wearing a "Legalise Marijuana!" T shirt

    It must be forty years since... oops!

  15. #15
    Originally Posted by Clef_Hanger View Post (Source)
    It must be forty years since... oops!
    When you posted that comment a bell rang at your local police station.

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