I remember the topic. Wasn't there mention of certain voluminous body parts pertaining to one Susan Boil?
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I remember the topic. Wasn't there mention of certain voluminous body parts pertaining to one Susan Boil?
Reflections on a bad day at Galileo Station
Docking was a pain, the toaster clogged with a type 9 and an Orca disputing right of way. The dockers had been particularly unhelpful, refusing to unload the cargo because they were on a break. The commodity market was on a downturn and the price had barely covered the cost of fuel and repairs. Finally the scan by system security had spotted the salvaged lifepod and imposed a fine that put the whole trip into the red.
No wonder that as the security vessel moved closer to take an ID photo through the canopy all they saw was the moon.
Docking was a pain, the toaster clogged with a type 9 and an Orca disputing right of way. The dockers had been particularly unhelpful, refusing to unload the cargo because they were on a break. The commodity market was on a downturn and the price had barely covered the cost of fuel and repairs. Finally the scan by system security had spotted the salvaged lifepod and imposed a fine that put the whole trip into the red.
No wonder that as the security vessel moved closer to take an ID photo through the canopy all they saw was the moon.
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Raise the White Flag
The lunar historian confirmed their fears as they approached the site "Those are new footprints."
Jim cursed as he leapt out of the SRV, this was the Tranquillity Preservation Society's worst fears, that someone would contaminate the site before they'd managed to fence it off. He'd known that some rich kids had private rockets to get to the newly-opened Space Hotel. He didn't think they could make it this far.
The footprints were strange; deep and pointed with a weird gait, more like scratches in the moondust. And they led to the indentation made by their spacecraft, an octagonal imprint.
The lunar historian confirmed their fears as they approached the site "Those are new footprints."
Jim cursed as he leapt out of the SRV, this was the Tranquillity Preservation Society's worst fears, that someone would contaminate the site before they'd managed to fence it off. He'd known that some rich kids had private rockets to get to the newly-opened Space Hotel. He didn't think they could make it this far.
The footprints were strange; deep and pointed with a weird gait, more like scratches in the moondust. And they led to the indentation made by their spacecraft, an octagonal imprint.
How Many Moons Does the Earth Have?
Psykokow: "How many Moons Does the Earth have?"
Simoof: "The Earth has one moon which is made of cheese."
(klaxons go off)
Psykokow: "Ohhhhh. I'm afraid you lose ten"
Simoof: "But it does have one moon"
Psykokow: "no"
Simoof: "It's called THE Moon"
Psykokow: "One of them"
Simoof: "I rest my case"
Psykokow: "I can understand Simoof, that you would feel hard done by, but the answer is there are two moons. One is the one we know, called The Moon. The other is called Cruithne. It's three miles across and orbits the world every seven hundred and seventy years."
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(Here is the rest of the sketch.)
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Simon Winnard: "You're just making this up. Cruithne?"
Psykokow: "Cruithne, yep."
Simone Winnard: "Who comes up with this stuff?" (pauses) "So you're telling me there's a second moon?"
Psykokow: "I am"
Alien: "Blue moon I saw you standing alone. Not with a small friend."
Simoof: "A long way away"
Simon Winnard: "Why is there not one romantic song with the word Cruithne in it? Why not Blue Cruithne Of Kentucky? or Cruithne River?"
Simoof: "No-one can see it"
Psykokow: "BECAUSE IT WAS DISCOVERED IN NINETEEN NINETY FLUFFING FOUR"
Simon Winnard: "So that was twenty one years to write a romantic song with the word Cruithne in it."
Psykokow: "For the last twenty one years so far as I know, no romantic songs have been written at all. Have they?"
Simoof: "Bryan Adams wrote one"
Psykokow: "Oh Please"
Eric Marcaigh: "Everything I do, I do it for Cruithne?"
Psykokow: "Well it's a challenge to all you song writers out there if you want to write songs rhyming the moon with June, find a rhyme for Cruithne"
Simon Winnard: "Come with me, fly me to Cruithne, Let me sing amongst the stars"
Simoof: "Will you miss me"
Psykokow: "Don't go to Dithney Land, go to Cruithne Land"
Simoof: (rapping) "Miss me, on Cruithne"
Psykokow: "Oh no no no not white middle class people doing rap" (Simoof cheers)
Psykokow: "No no not doing that please" (making rapping hand gestures) "No no so embarrassing"
Psykokow: (puts finger to ear) "We have late breaking news as a matter of fact, Cruithne is pronounced Crewinya and is actually Celtic and it's orbit was discovered in nineteen ninety seven. People have been busy on our behalf on the internet and elsewhere calling up important Astronomers Royal."
EDIT: And before anyone outs my drabble ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1zuAQAhhMI
Psykokow: "How many Moons Does the Earth have?"
Simoof: "The Earth has one moon which is made of cheese."
(klaxons go off)
Psykokow: "Ohhhhh. I'm afraid you lose ten"
Simoof: "But it does have one moon"
Psykokow: "no"
Simoof: "It's called THE Moon"
Psykokow: "One of them"
Simoof: "I rest my case"
Psykokow: "I can understand Simoof, that you would feel hard done by, but the answer is there are two moons. One is the one we know, called The Moon. The other is called Cruithne. It's three miles across and orbits the world every seven hundred and seventy years."
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(Here is the rest of the sketch.)
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Simon Winnard: "You're just making this up. Cruithne?"
Psykokow: "Cruithne, yep."
Simone Winnard: "Who comes up with this stuff?" (pauses) "So you're telling me there's a second moon?"
Psykokow: "I am"
Alien: "Blue moon I saw you standing alone. Not with a small friend."
Simoof: "A long way away"
Simon Winnard: "Why is there not one romantic song with the word Cruithne in it? Why not Blue Cruithne Of Kentucky? or Cruithne River?"
Simoof: "No-one can see it"
Psykokow: "BECAUSE IT WAS DISCOVERED IN NINETEEN NINETY FLUFFING FOUR"
Simon Winnard: "So that was twenty one years to write a romantic song with the word Cruithne in it."
Psykokow: "For the last twenty one years so far as I know, no romantic songs have been written at all. Have they?"
Simoof: "Bryan Adams wrote one"
Psykokow: "Oh Please"
Eric Marcaigh: "Everything I do, I do it for Cruithne?"
Psykokow: "Well it's a challenge to all you song writers out there if you want to write songs rhyming the moon with June, find a rhyme for Cruithne"
Simon Winnard: "Come with me, fly me to Cruithne, Let me sing amongst the stars"
Simoof: "Will you miss me"
Psykokow: "Don't go to Dithney Land, go to Cruithne Land"
Simoof: (rapping) "Miss me, on Cruithne"
Psykokow: "Oh no no no not white middle class people doing rap" (Simoof cheers)
Psykokow: "No no not doing that please" (making rapping hand gestures) "No no so embarrassing"
Psykokow: (puts finger to ear) "We have late breaking news as a matter of fact, Cruithne is pronounced Crewinya and is actually Celtic and it's orbit was discovered in nineteen ninety seven. People have been busy on our behalf on the internet and elsewhere calling up important Astronomers Royal."
EDIT: And before anyone outs my drabble ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1zuAQAhhMI
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More recently Q.I. said that the Moon isn't a moon [video=youtube;2l1Y7zsdLJc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2l1Y7zsdLJc[/video]
New Moon - Immature Moon
Did he really say the Moon? How infantile.
"Shall I fetch the book of innuendos sir?" enquired Wayton.
"You already gave it to me." interrupted Commander Nayarz.
The book had a section dedicated to astral bodies, most of it dedicated to just one planet.
Nayarz fingered through uranus.
"Here it is... Moon - to bare ones buttocks at another"
Nayarz sat-up, thoughtful.
"Tradesmen!! Infamous for unwanten accidental buttock displays. Get me a plumber!"
After a few minutes Wayton opened comms to a local plumber.
"I have something I need you to do for me."
"You do?, Should I grab my caulk?"
Did he really say the Moon? How infantile.
"Shall I fetch the book of innuendos sir?" enquired Wayton.
"You already gave it to me." interrupted Commander Nayarz.
The book had a section dedicated to astral bodies, most of it dedicated to just one planet.
Nayarz fingered through uranus.
"Here it is... Moon - to bare ones buttocks at another"
Nayarz sat-up, thoughtful.
"Tradesmen!! Infamous for unwanten accidental buttock displays. Get me a plumber!"
After a few minutes Wayton opened comms to a local plumber.
"I have something I need you to do for me."
"You do?, Should I grab my caulk?"
There may be some conspiracy theorists who would say that I'd shoved a provocative topic right up in their faces so that they couldn't resist, and then did my own very strait-laced Drabble. Everyone knows that innuendo-laden Drabbles never win the competition, thereby I increased my chances of winning.
Some might say that. I wouldn't grace such accusations with a reply.
Some might say that. I wouldn't grace such accusations with a reply.
Goose4291
Banned
Tactical Use of Terrain
“Jump complete. All stations report.”
“Command, Nav. GPS fix confirms position correct.”
“Command, Manuvering. FSD cooling down, reactor operating within normal parameters.”
Triearchus Marcellus looked at the Sensors team. “Any sign of counter detection?”
“No increased comms chatter. As expected, the moon appears to have masked our signature.”
“Excellent. Flight Deck, Fretensis Actual. Deploy the package”
Four Eagles in pirate paint jobs, a sharp contrast from the pristine white of the Fretensis’ hull, launched from her hanger. Whilst the Fretensis jumped away to the staging area, they set upon their mission: the Imperial undermining of Winters’ space with plausible deniability.
“Jump complete. All stations report.”
“Command, Nav. GPS fix confirms position correct.”
“Command, Manuvering. FSD cooling down, reactor operating within normal parameters.”
Triearchus Marcellus looked at the Sensors team. “Any sign of counter detection?”
“No increased comms chatter. As expected, the moon appears to have masked our signature.”
“Excellent. Flight Deck, Fretensis Actual. Deploy the package”
Four Eagles in pirate paint jobs, a sharp contrast from the pristine white of the Fretensis’ hull, launched from her hanger. Whilst the Fretensis jumped away to the staging area, they set upon their mission: the Imperial undermining of Winters’ space with plausible deniability.
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BADGE OF HONOR?
"He's going to ruin us"
"Sales have never been higher!"
"He's making us into a joke"
"Sales are up 9% last quarter!"
"He's too strange. It's unnerving."
"What celebrity personality doesn't have idiosyncrasies?"
"It's only a matter of time until he opens his mouth and says something WE can't take back"
"Any publicity is good publicity. Why don't you like him? Everyone else likes him."
"It's unsettling... worrisome. Last night I was taking a walk around the palisade and Buck Nekkid was out there, barking at the moon"
"That's really not that strange."
"REALLY? We do not have a moon!!!"
"He's going to ruin us"
"Sales have never been higher!"
"He's making us into a joke"
"Sales are up 9% last quarter!"
"He's too strange. It's unnerving."
"What celebrity personality doesn't have idiosyncrasies?"
"It's only a matter of time until he opens his mouth and says something WE can't take back"
"Any publicity is good publicity. Why don't you like him? Everyone else likes him."
"It's unsettling... worrisome. Last night I was taking a walk around the palisade and Buck Nekkid was out there, barking at the moon"
"That's really not that strange."
"REALLY? We do not have a moon!!!"
Fess up, Frank. You just wanted to try out being Simon or Moofster at least once in your life.
Flight A572 - Destination Moon
Good Moon-ing! I’d like to take this opportunity as we reach the main event of our Moon package tour to remind you not to miss out on the chance to cash in your complimentary 20% off voucher for all Moon tour merchandise, we have caps, mugs and of course our very special line of clothing allowing you to relive your moon tours experience all year round. Please move over to your assigned viewing port with specially warmed glass. Ladies and Gentlemen please unhook your custom quick release, double lined Moon tours mooning flaps… it is time…. TO MOON THE MOON!
Good Moon-ing! I’d like to take this opportunity as we reach the main event of our Moon package tour to remind you not to miss out on the chance to cash in your complimentary 20% off voucher for all Moon tour merchandise, we have caps, mugs and of course our very special line of clothing allowing you to relive your moon tours experience all year round. Please move over to your assigned viewing port with specially warmed glass. Ladies and Gentlemen please unhook your custom quick release, double lined Moon tours mooning flaps… it is time…. TO MOON THE MOON!
"A Bum Deal" or "Who am I to swim against the stream?"
It had to happen, sooner or later.
I was happy when the Science-Foundation put the permanent base on Ion, our moon, and even happier when I was offered a three year stint as solo science-officer and maintenance-crew.
Alone. Finally away from the "madding-crowd", the increasingly sheep-like and antisocial society we've developed.
It wasn't too bad when they started the tourist fly-by's; they maintained a reasonable, undisturbing altitude...
But now they have the tourist-laden land-cruisers! They land, and drive right past the base, tourists' buttocks pressed up against the view-ports!
I think I'll buy a ship and head into deep space.
It had to happen, sooner or later.
I was happy when the Science-Foundation put the permanent base on Ion, our moon, and even happier when I was offered a three year stint as solo science-officer and maintenance-crew.
Alone. Finally away from the "madding-crowd", the increasingly sheep-like and antisocial society we've developed.
It wasn't too bad when they started the tourist fly-by's; they maintained a reasonable, undisturbing altitude...
But now they have the tourist-laden land-cruisers! They land, and drive right past the base, tourists' buttocks pressed up against the view-ports!
I think I'll buy a ship and head into deep space.
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Ah, yes; the eternal conundrum.
Ah, yes, the eternal conundrum.
Ah, yes! The eternal conundrum.
'though with this week's topic, I would expect quite a few colons being used.
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Return to Sender
Pat watched the mission clock tick down to 5 minutes.This would be close but his confidence was high. The reward was worth the cryptic penalty of "bound in servitude" for a simple delivery of fan mail to Lady Boils at her secret orbital home.
Dropping into the destination system Pat triggered his discovery scanner as he once again read the address, Ms Boils, Moon. With a resounding honk the orbit lines of a hundred moons appeared around the majestic lady's gaseous home.
Pat cried in frustration as the head of his beloved wobbly bobble squeezed off between his hands.
Pat watched the mission clock tick down to 5 minutes.This would be close but his confidence was high. The reward was worth the cryptic penalty of "bound in servitude" for a simple delivery of fan mail to Lady Boils at her secret orbital home.
Dropping into the destination system Pat triggered his discovery scanner as he once again read the address, Ms Boils, Moon. With a resounding honk the orbit lines of a hundred moons appeared around the majestic lady's gaseous home.
Pat cried in frustration as the head of his beloved wobbly bobble squeezed off between his hands.
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01 - moose666 - CSI Barnards Star
02 - Rascon - A Sad Day
03 - cleonymus - Reflections on a bad day at Galileo Station
04 - Frank - Raise the White Flag
05 - Alien - How Many Moons Does the Earth Have?
06 - Simoof - New Moon - Immature Moon
07 - Goose4291 - Tactical Use of Terrain
08 - CMDR Texas Stu - BADGE OF HONOR?
09 - Thirstybadger - Flight A572 - Destination Moon
10 - Darkoba - "A Bum Deal" or "Who am I to swim against the stream?"
11 - Galactic Midden - Return to Sender
Well here we are near the end of the Drabble contest for the week. There's just the one day left and only eleven entries. It would be undignified for an old miner like myself to get on my knees and beg..
Puh-leez! could we have more entries? <sob> Eleven entries is not nearly enough <wail> If you enter a Drabble I'll dance fer you..
The auld grey mare she aint wot whe used to be..
aint wot whe used to be..
aint wot whe used to be..
<clompity clomp clompity clompity>
02 - Rascon - A Sad Day
03 - cleonymus - Reflections on a bad day at Galileo Station
04 - Frank - Raise the White Flag
05 - Alien - How Many Moons Does the Earth Have?
06 - Simoof - New Moon - Immature Moon
07 - Goose4291 - Tactical Use of Terrain
08 - CMDR Texas Stu - BADGE OF HONOR?
09 - Thirstybadger - Flight A572 - Destination Moon
10 - Darkoba - "A Bum Deal" or "Who am I to swim against the stream?"
11 - Galactic Midden - Return to Sender
Well here we are near the end of the Drabble contest for the week. There's just the one day left and only eleven entries. It would be undignified for an old miner like myself to get on my knees and beg..
Puh-leez! could we have more entries? <sob> Eleven entries is not nearly enough <wail> If you enter a Drabble I'll dance fer you..
The auld grey mare she aint wot whe used to be..
aint wot whe used to be..
aint wot whe used to be..
<clompity clomp clompity clompity>
Frank you've surpassed yourself. Let me get the nurse...
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