Ban People Older Than 20 From The Game

Elite Dangerous is a new game, and as such needs new, imaginative players. The ancient, decaying wrecks of our failed history (Frontier First Encounters, anyone?) are as irrelevant to us today as the Galactic Cooperative is to the people of 3306. It is these mouldering dreadnoughts, fused to decrepit armchairs by decades of rot, who hold back the development of the games. Older people have single-handedly destroyed the entire game, just by existing. In fact, I think the game would be infinitely better if Elite (1984) had never existed, because it is simply too old to be of any use.

Thus, I propose that all players over the age of 20 should be banned for their own good. This will include me sometime in the future. To go into semantics, it already includes me. I accept my fate. The young must be shielded from the folly of the old.

In addition, all ships that were introduced to the series after the 2000s should be removed from the game as well. They will then be made into marketable wooden carvings for all the old people to buy. Coats of Frontier-approved paint can be bought with leftover pre-ban ARX or real money. This allows Frontier to keep their monetization models rolling, leading to a 1600% increase in revenue.
 
Elite Dangerous is a new game, and as such needs new, imaginative players. The ancient, decaying wrecks of our failed history (Frontier First Encounters, anyone?) are as irrelevant to us today as the Galactic Cooperative is to the people of 3306. It is these mouldering dreadnoughts, fused to decrepit armchairs by decades of rot, who hold back the development of the games. Older people have single-handedly destroyed the entire game, just by existing. In fact, I think the game would be infinitely better if Elite (1984) had never existed, because it is simply too old to be of any use.

Thus, I propose that all players over the age of 20 should be banned for their own good. This will include me sometime in the future. To go into semantics, it already includes me. I accept my fate. The young must be shielded from the folly of the old.

In addition, all ships that were introduced to the series after the 2000s should be removed from the game as well. They will then be made into marketable wooden carvings for all the old people to buy. Coats of Frontier-approved paint can be bought with leftover pre-ban ARX or real money. This allows Frontier to keep their monetization models rolling, leading to a 1600% increase in revenue.
That is a fantastic idea. My old bones don't need to be playing games anyway, games are for children!
 
COULD SOMEONE REPEAT WHAT HE SAID ? MY HEARING AID BATTERIES ARE DOWN AND THOSE DAMN KIDS ARE ALWAYS WHISPERING 😣
ELITE DANGEROUS IS A NEW GAME, AND AS SUCH NEEDS NEW, IMAGINATIVE PLAYERS. THE ANCIENT, DECAYING WRECKS OF OUR FAILED HISTORY (FRONTIER FIRST ENCOUNTERS, ANYONE?) ARE AS IRRELEVANT TO US TODAY AS THE GALACTIC COOPERATIVE IS TO THE PEOPLE OF 3306. IT IS THESE MOULDERING DREADNOUGHTS, FUSED TO DECREPIT ARMCHAIRS BY DECADES OF ROT, WHO HOLD BACK THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE GAMES. OLDER PEOPLE HAVE SINGLE-HANDEDLY DESTROYED THE ENTIRE GAME, JUST BY EXISTING. IN FACT, I THINK THE GAME WOULD BE INFINITELY BETTER IF ELITE (1984) HAD NEVER EXISTED, BECAUSE IT IS SIMPLY TOO OLD TO BE OF ANY USE.

THUS, I PROPOSE THAT ALL PLAYERS OVER THE AGE OF 20 SHOULD BE BANNED FOR THEIR OWN GOOD. THIS WILL INCLUDE ME SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE. TO GO INTO SEMANTICS, IT ALREADY INCLUDES ME. I ACCEPT MY FATE. THE YOUNG MUST BE SHIELDED FROM THE FOLLY OF THE OLD.

IN ADDITION, ALL SHIPS THAT WERE INTRODUCED TO THE SERIES AFTER THE 2000S SHOULD BE REMOVED FROM THE GAME AS WELL. THEY WILL THEN BE MADE INTO MARKETABLE WOODEN CARVINGS FOR ALL THE OLD PEOPLE TO BUY. COATS OF FRONTIER-APPROVED PAINT CAN BE BOUGHT WITH LEFTOVER PRE-BAN ARX OR REAL MONEY. THIS ALLOWS FRONTIER TO KEEP THEIR MONETIZATION MODELS ROLLING, LEADING TO A 1600% INCREASE IN REVENUE.
 
I'm 72 and triple elite so you can go screw yourself! Also have more than 3500 hrs in game.
I am 116 years old and quintuple elite, along with all the medals from the wars and I am also a third degree mega-mason. Also have more than 6500 hours in tetris and candy crush.

Therefore please ban anyone younger that 41 years of age from this game as their newfangled language confuses me and kills my immersion
 
Don't feed the trolls.. or was it just bad sarcasm... so hard to tell . meanwhile Painite today is less than 400k/ton and to date nothing has been buffed by Fdev.

OP you sound like an extra special snowflake, who deeply misses your painite mining. Go ask your Mom for a glass of juice and try again tomorrow :)
 
In a few years I'll be double banned!

But wait...

Double negatives make a positive?

So will my double ban be a double negative means I get to come back to the game when I'm Forty?
Unfortunately, your childish attempts at logic will not dissuade the ATR sandmen.
Instead, for every 20-year increment beyond 20 one ages, they will be sent to another layer of Hell - which is to say, they get an alt account on the forums.
 
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