I must respectfully disagree.
I didn't discover the forums and other internet tools until I was well into my first AspX.
I did the tutorials (well up to the impossible ones anyway) so I learned to fly and how to at least deploy for combat in game (considerably easier than the tutorials I might add)
I knew the concept from playing the original Elite so immediately started spreadsheets with market data which I kept updated myself and used to plan 20 hop routes ultimately.
I made some money, upgraded to Hauler (very briefly), Cobra and then AspX. Used trading missions to A rate Asp eventually.
I mostly ran away from combat at that point - the Cobra does that very well.
Only once I started rares running did I begin to search for advice on the internet and that was the Thrudds tool IIRC.
Internet tools have made me better at certain elements as I have progressed....but "Impossible"?? No Sir. "Not playable"?? Hogwash.
Oh, PS I did all that playing in Solo and therefore disagree with you that it is even harder for people that do not like to play with others.
AMEN to that! And your history is almost identical to mine. Only I never flew a hauler, and didn't run away from combat anymore after I upgraded to the Cobra.
Elite is a tough game, and occasionally it is unfair. But I have not encountered a single situation so far that I have not been able to resolve. Sometimes I had to adjust my strategy, and often enough I was struggling. As you said - difficult? Yes. Impossible? Nonsense.
And as for "resorting to forums and internet videos" - that does help, but it's not absolutely necessary. I came here because after some 100 hours in the game, I was looking for inspiration, and for some feedback on how to improve my game.
If you hit a wall in ED, there is 2 ways to deal with it. You can come here and ask for tips on how to improve your game, and will easily find it, as ED has a very helpful and supportive community (something I cannot say about nearly every game I play). Or you can come here and about how crappy the game is. I never quite understood why people do that, as all they achieve with it is that others now know about their dislike. But okay, to each his own.