Let me tell you a miraculous tale of daring do. Drabble Contest #184: Big Damn Heroes, There's A Logo, The Miracle
Welcome to the Drabble show. Last week's competition was a three way tie, and they all gave us topics for this week.
Edith gave us Big Damn Heroes
Commander Gale suggests There's A Logo
And Simoof gave us The Miracle
Psykokow hosts the Abraka-Drabble live reading show and "comedy" hour at 7pm GMT, Fridays on...
HUTTON ORBITAL RADIO! http://streaming.radionomy.com/HuttonOrbitalRadio (audio only)
LAVE RADIO! http://laveradio.com/ (audio only)
TWITCH! http://www.twitch.tv/psykokow/ (audio & visual)
and will also be uploaded to his You-tube channel & anywhere else he can inflict the world with our drabblings!
Come back on Sunday night to see how well your Drabble has done. At least come back before Monday 15:00 to check if you're the one that has to provide us with a topic.
Please vote. And a warning to all of the contestants, placeholder. Something unfortunate involving Big Damn Heroes and Logos, or just pray that something else will appear here.
01 - Bingo Brewster - HYGIENE
Dear Sirs
Thank you for considering the following drabble.
This is my drabble wot I wrote:
HYGIENE
The Asp-Explorer with its two-man crew, didn't boast much in the way of luxuries.
So when the Grav-Shower-4000 came to market, it was a no-brainer.
To enjoy a hot shower on the way to Sag-A was too good to miss.
18K LY out, she decided to treat herself.
luxuriating in the warm jets of water, she felt rather than heard, the door slide open behind her.
Her skin tingled as she felt a sensual touch run-up her spine caressing her neck.
She let out a sigh
Then a soft moan of despair
as the tentacle tightened inexorably around her neck
02 - Frank - Thus it is Written
Braben Almighty hath worked His wonders. The Galaxy now had pressurised planets on whicheth to land. But this brought fluids to planets.
The people of Elite doth cry in despair. "Verily, our village shall flood!"
A lowly miner nameth Frank ate from a tin of chocolates. The tin bareth the logo of Cadbury. He tooketh from it a wrapt confection and placeth it within the dry valley in the path of the flood. With arms stretched he praised the name of Braben! The sweet doth grew and stretch 'til it block't both banks, and lo it held back the waters.
03 - Alien - The Galaxy's Hardest Crossword
"Four across, thirty-six letters, Big Damn Heroes"
"You what Harry?"
"Big Damn Heroes, that's the clue."
"Yes, but ... thirty-six letters?"
"It's the Galactic Times crossword."
"You can't even colour in without going over the lines."
"Five down, four hundred and sixty two letters, that's not where the banana goes."
"Put the crossword away before The Boss comes back."
"Ok Ozzy, here's an easier one ... seven down, eleven letters, non-Greek small people."
"Up your butt"
"What?"
"Five down."
"Oh ... no, it doesn't fit."
"Oh My God We've Got Another Pun To Shun Oh Yeah."
"Huh?"
"Four across"
"Oh yeah ... thank you."
04 - Simoof - Rebranding - The Winnard Way.
Up in the glass Directors booth, Winnard was showing off his new design for McThargoids.
"The M represents motherhood, the T masculinity."
"We don't get it!" the concensus of the board.
With his laser pointer Winnard drew the outline around the logo mounted onto the glass wall overlooking the factory floor. A curly M and a curly T.
"Sorry we just..."
"Ti-ts and co-ck you imbeciles" shouted Winnard dropping his pointer.
He bent to pick it up.
On the shop floor Jimmy, nudged the co worker beside him.
"You always wanted your name up in lights!"
Tom was not amused.
05 - Listeri69 - At McTharogids Your McStiffy will be Stiff And Your Trumble Balls Will be Hairy.....
We're big damn heroes' Simoof exclaimed. The Mayor pinned his medal through his left nipple.
'It's a Miracle' Psykokow agreed, waving to the crowd that had lined the streets
'All I suggested was, the McThargoids logo needed something new' Simoof explained.
'You changed the logo so much they now worship us as gods. First rebranding in a century they said, so honestly? what did you do?'
'Well I was doodling some hairs on the ole T&M balls logo, when it hit me'
'The Idea?'
'No the logo, the bloody stain coming out of the end of the...well that's my contribution'
06 - RoyalHankey - Mike Untis-arrsol big secret logo
Simoof's Viper appeared before Psykokow's Imperial Cutter.
Simoof opened communication channels with Psykokow.
Simoof said "How come you are here, your orders was to stay at Lave Station"..
Psykokow said "There are Cutter's, Anaconda's, Fer-de-Lance's, Python's and a corvette there so I thought you needed a hand".
"This was supposed to be a secret mission and now you blown it, how did you know anyway".
Psykokow replied "You told me last night when you were drunk".
Simoof said "It will be a miracle if we get in the Dambuster's squad now".
"All I had to do is get the Logo"
07 - MrMogadon - This story has it all, Peril, Partial Nudity, Puns and Someone gets a Happy Ending
Whilst out exploring, Simoof had ripped his simmit, exposing his left nipple.
Death being the well-known local penalty for baring any abdominal area.
Conveniently, Alien wandered past his hiding place carrying some sewing supplies.
Simoof begged Alien to help.
“Not a bad job” he said putting it on.
“Your repair looks just like the MacThargoid’s Auditors badge. I wonder…” he continued, his voice trailing off as he hurried off.
Later after they’d both dined on MacT’s best.
Alien remarked “Your plan for free food worked. You’re still alive. Both miracles!”
Simoof replied, “All thanks to you, my big darn hero”.
08 - rootsrat - To The Rescue
Commander Mathias Shallowgrave leaned his body against the door and pushed hard for the fifth time. The door didn’t budge.
“Why didn’t we bring laser pistols? Don’t answer. It was a rhetorical question”.
Commander Jeddah Malakai, Shallowgrave’s friend and partner, ignored the remark and said:
“Mathias, there’s a logo here, look. Right at the top of that door”.
“What does it say?”
“Pull…”
“That’s a miracle! How could we even miss it before?!”
“We?”
“Nevermind. Let’s get in and free those poor slaves. That’s what big damn heroes do!”
“Yeah, especially when paid so much…”
“What?”
“Nothing. Let’s do this!”
09 - Edith_The_Hutt - Undocumented Feature
“There's a logo! three people next to a crosshair!” yelled Sally as she jinked the Cobra around incoming plasma while Alun scanned buttons frantically; finally he activated the gunner station.
A hundred Thargon lasers screeched along the hull, the shields had failed.
“We need a M-”
CAPITAL SHIP SIGNATURE DETECTED
The Faragut's forward guns began to fire before the aft had passed into the Real, rail-guns blasting righteous fury at three hundred thousand metres per second. Moments later Condor wings disgorged from her belly, marking each Thargon with an angry human fighter.
Sally blinked in disbelief, “Which button was that?”
10 - phong - Pulp Friction
The colony was in trouble.It seemed like a benign planet when they first landed,and the settlement had expanded quickly, sprawling across the valley floor,making use of the fertile soil to grow an abundance of fruit and vegetables during that first long summer that would ensure that they were well provided with nourishment to sustain them in the bitter winter that followed.But alarm spread through the colonists when their climatologist pointed out the danger that lay ahead when the spring arrived and the snow melted.Their salvation lay in genetically enhanced beavers,those beautiful big dam heroes.
11 - Commander Sir Samuel Vimes - Hero in a shart suit
Simoof wanted to be known across the galaxy. He needed a logo to wear on his onesies so people would know he was a big damn hero he also needed to do something miraculous so people would think he was a proper hero.
He settled on a masculine looking tree as a logo. As for the miracle he'd heard rumours of a pirate near sag-a.
A few weeks later news filtered back through gal net of a titanic battle near sag-a. Sadly they found out Simoof had flown into a star on the way there after winging up with flossy
12 - FelixBast - All signs point to Hero.
The desert planet of Bowie has no naturally forming atmospheric precipitation.
A terraforming program was started two years ago to make this mining colony more habitable, but another twenty years will pass before this process can produce any rain.
Currently, water is shipped from nearby systems in large convoys. These convoys consist of larger than life pilots who ship, not for profit, but for the love of “trucking”. The ships belonging to these miraculous heroes can be recognised by the livery proudly displayed on the hull.
A simple logo consisting of a sun with an arrow, pointing towards an outpost.
13 - Futuristic Kung Fu - Big Damm's miracle logo
In the Kamito system, there lived a man who flew a Keelback and knew every barman in the sector. He wore a badge on his chest. The logo on this badge resembled an upside down bottle. Legend said whatever hit that logo, the man wouldn't be hurt. The man's name was Oi-Dammagalmautasion-Pisayhkioskioaw-Wann-ka, but everyone called him Big Damm.
One day, the Feds tried to arrest him. They were armed with the new TJ-31 blaster. Their leader, a cruel brute missing eight thirds of his teeth, shot Big Damm right on that logo.
Big Damm, he fell.
Big Damm, he rose.
14 - CMDR FluffyBun - Little Cause for Celebrations
Fluffybun’s CQC simulator was taking shape. Though rather than modelling structures, Fluffy decided model various chocolate bars instead. The resulting arena was beyond the miraculous dreams of Willy Wonka.
On the first test flight, Fluffybun was being shot at by AI ships from all directions.
“I need to get away from this” squeaked our hero, and flew towards a power-up, one of the big damn Cadbury’s miniature heroes. Fluffy was certain of the power-up he was flying toward, he knew there was a logo but couldn’t quite see it. Irrespective, he hurtled into it.
KABOOM
“Fudge?! I wanted a Boost!”
15 - Cmder Gale - False Advertising
"Good Morning Dresler. Wakeup with Maxil Techtronics: Every day, on the dot."
I open my eyes. The screen flashes six-fifteen Centauri standard time. I smell stimulant. The gas will be extra on my account.
I roll out of the bunk, dress in today's overalls and activate a headset. The Rockforth Corporation logo appears on my chest. Make your vacation special. As if I could afford one!
Doesn’t matter, adverts aren’t for me.
“Dres, the toilets are blocked. Deck four.”
“Okay.”
Maybe there’ll be a rich trader desperate to 'have a pee' and book a holiday?
Earn myself a bonus?
Fat g chance.
16 - Hot Sporran - Despicable Mi
Mi rolled from the smoking cockpit onto the shore and peered across the lapping water at the enemy target. The urgent destruction mission now in tatters, Mi looked up at the inverted cockpit hatch thinking, "big dam... Mi rows in the hatch?".
Mi's comms alert triggered. "Mi, you on your way?" crackled Yu through the smoldering ship speaker.
Connecting via suit comms Mi replied, "Yu? What?"
"It's Pizza night Mi".
Mi swore. "I've crashed on mission... why didn't you remind me Yu"
"Not my job Mi", replied Yu "flying eh, you chose to go low there didn't you? Stupid Mi"
17 - CMDR Texas Stu - Untitled
It was just TOO big. Nothing will stop it.
It will completely annihilate everyone and there is nothing to be done about it.
It would take something like a huge wall but there is not enough time, even IF it were possible.
Everyone on the platform waited for the inevitable.
Then, from opposite directions they came, blocking all light but that they make
Thousands of Anacondas.
Locking together as if they were welded and creating a huge dam/wall to protect the platform!
Wing Leader Alpha, "You know what that makes us, don't ya?"
Wingman Four, "Big Dam Heroes, Sir!"
18 - insanephoton - Shopping
Alien and Kow had spent hours browsing the toy shop looking for a suitable Empire day gift for little Simoof. reaching the model spaceship aisle Kow stopped abruptly
"Do you notice anything about that red Python?"
"There's some kind of logo on it. What of it?" Alien answered in a bemused tone.
"Yeah, it's a 'Big Damn Heroes' decal on it, do you know what that means?"
"Enlighten me."
"They're incredibly rare, collectors pay an absolute fortune for them"
"How much?"
"Pristine examples can go for up to twelve thousand"
"No, how much to buy it?"
"twenty creds"
"A miracle"
Welcome to the Drabble show. Last week's competition was a three way tie, and they all gave us topics for this week.
Edith gave us Big Damn Heroes
Commander Gale suggests There's A Logo
And Simoof gave us The Miracle
Psykokow hosts the Abraka-Drabble live reading show and "comedy" hour at 7pm GMT, Fridays on...
HUTTON ORBITAL RADIO! http://streaming.radionomy.com/HuttonOrbitalRadio (audio only)
LAVE RADIO! http://laveradio.com/ (audio only)
TWITCH! http://www.twitch.tv/psykokow/ (audio & visual)
and will also be uploaded to his You-tube channel & anywhere else he can inflict the world with our drabblings!
Come back on Sunday night to see how well your Drabble has done. At least come back before Monday 15:00 to check if you're the one that has to provide us with a topic.
Please vote. And a warning to all of the contestants, placeholder. Something unfortunate involving Big Damn Heroes and Logos, or just pray that something else will appear here.
01 - Bingo Brewster - HYGIENE
Dear Sirs
Thank you for considering the following drabble.
This is my drabble wot I wrote:
HYGIENE
The Asp-Explorer with its two-man crew, didn't boast much in the way of luxuries.
So when the Grav-Shower-4000 came to market, it was a no-brainer.
To enjoy a hot shower on the way to Sag-A was too good to miss.
18K LY out, she decided to treat herself.
luxuriating in the warm jets of water, she felt rather than heard, the door slide open behind her.
Her skin tingled as she felt a sensual touch run-up her spine caressing her neck.
She let out a sigh
Then a soft moan of despair
as the tentacle tightened inexorably around her neck
02 - Frank - Thus it is Written
Braben Almighty hath worked His wonders. The Galaxy now had pressurised planets on whicheth to land. But this brought fluids to planets.
The people of Elite doth cry in despair. "Verily, our village shall flood!"
A lowly miner nameth Frank ate from a tin of chocolates. The tin bareth the logo of Cadbury. He tooketh from it a wrapt confection and placeth it within the dry valley in the path of the flood. With arms stretched he praised the name of Braben! The sweet doth grew and stretch 'til it block't both banks, and lo it held back the waters.
03 - Alien - The Galaxy's Hardest Crossword
"Four across, thirty-six letters, Big Damn Heroes"
"You what Harry?"
"Big Damn Heroes, that's the clue."
"Yes, but ... thirty-six letters?"
"It's the Galactic Times crossword."
"You can't even colour in without going over the lines."
"Five down, four hundred and sixty two letters, that's not where the banana goes."
"Put the crossword away before The Boss comes back."
"Ok Ozzy, here's an easier one ... seven down, eleven letters, non-Greek small people."
"Up your butt"
"What?"
"Five down."
"Oh ... no, it doesn't fit."
"Oh My God We've Got Another Pun To Shun Oh Yeah."
"Huh?"
"Four across"
"Oh yeah ... thank you."
04 - Simoof - Rebranding - The Winnard Way.
Up in the glass Directors booth, Winnard was showing off his new design for McThargoids.
"The M represents motherhood, the T masculinity."
"We don't get it!" the concensus of the board.
With his laser pointer Winnard drew the outline around the logo mounted onto the glass wall overlooking the factory floor. A curly M and a curly T.
"Sorry we just..."
"Ti-ts and co-ck you imbeciles" shouted Winnard dropping his pointer.
He bent to pick it up.
On the shop floor Jimmy, nudged the co worker beside him.
"You always wanted your name up in lights!"
Tom was not amused.
05 - Listeri69 - At McTharogids Your McStiffy will be Stiff And Your Trumble Balls Will be Hairy.....
We're big damn heroes' Simoof exclaimed. The Mayor pinned his medal through his left nipple.
'It's a Miracle' Psykokow agreed, waving to the crowd that had lined the streets
'All I suggested was, the McThargoids logo needed something new' Simoof explained.
'You changed the logo so much they now worship us as gods. First rebranding in a century they said, so honestly? what did you do?'
'Well I was doodling some hairs on the ole T&M balls logo, when it hit me'
'The Idea?'
'No the logo, the bloody stain coming out of the end of the...well that's my contribution'
06 - RoyalHankey - Mike Untis-arrsol big secret logo
Simoof's Viper appeared before Psykokow's Imperial Cutter.
Simoof opened communication channels with Psykokow.
Simoof said "How come you are here, your orders was to stay at Lave Station"..
Psykokow said "There are Cutter's, Anaconda's, Fer-de-Lance's, Python's and a corvette there so I thought you needed a hand".
"This was supposed to be a secret mission and now you blown it, how did you know anyway".
Psykokow replied "You told me last night when you were drunk".
Simoof said "It will be a miracle if we get in the Dambuster's squad now".
"All I had to do is get the Logo"
07 - MrMogadon - This story has it all, Peril, Partial Nudity, Puns and Someone gets a Happy Ending
Whilst out exploring, Simoof had ripped his simmit, exposing his left nipple.
Death being the well-known local penalty for baring any abdominal area.
Conveniently, Alien wandered past his hiding place carrying some sewing supplies.
Simoof begged Alien to help.
“Not a bad job” he said putting it on.
“Your repair looks just like the MacThargoid’s Auditors badge. I wonder…” he continued, his voice trailing off as he hurried off.
Later after they’d both dined on MacT’s best.
Alien remarked “Your plan for free food worked. You’re still alive. Both miracles!”
Simoof replied, “All thanks to you, my big darn hero”.
08 - rootsrat - To The Rescue
Commander Mathias Shallowgrave leaned his body against the door and pushed hard for the fifth time. The door didn’t budge.
“Why didn’t we bring laser pistols? Don’t answer. It was a rhetorical question”.
Commander Jeddah Malakai, Shallowgrave’s friend and partner, ignored the remark and said:
“Mathias, there’s a logo here, look. Right at the top of that door”.
“What does it say?”
“Pull…”
“That’s a miracle! How could we even miss it before?!”
“We?”
“Nevermind. Let’s get in and free those poor slaves. That’s what big damn heroes do!”
“Yeah, especially when paid so much…”
“What?”
“Nothing. Let’s do this!”
09 - Edith_The_Hutt - Undocumented Feature
“There's a logo! three people next to a crosshair!” yelled Sally as she jinked the Cobra around incoming plasma while Alun scanned buttons frantically; finally he activated the gunner station.
A hundred Thargon lasers screeched along the hull, the shields had failed.
“We need a M-”
CAPITAL SHIP SIGNATURE DETECTED
The Faragut's forward guns began to fire before the aft had passed into the Real, rail-guns blasting righteous fury at three hundred thousand metres per second. Moments later Condor wings disgorged from her belly, marking each Thargon with an angry human fighter.
Sally blinked in disbelief, “Which button was that?”
10 - phong - Pulp Friction
The colony was in trouble.It seemed like a benign planet when they first landed,and the settlement had expanded quickly, sprawling across the valley floor,making use of the fertile soil to grow an abundance of fruit and vegetables during that first long summer that would ensure that they were well provided with nourishment to sustain them in the bitter winter that followed.But alarm spread through the colonists when their climatologist pointed out the danger that lay ahead when the spring arrived and the snow melted.Their salvation lay in genetically enhanced beavers,those beautiful big dam heroes.
11 - Commander Sir Samuel Vimes - Hero in a shart suit
Simoof wanted to be known across the galaxy. He needed a logo to wear on his onesies so people would know he was a big damn hero he also needed to do something miraculous so people would think he was a proper hero.
He settled on a masculine looking tree as a logo. As for the miracle he'd heard rumours of a pirate near sag-a.
A few weeks later news filtered back through gal net of a titanic battle near sag-a. Sadly they found out Simoof had flown into a star on the way there after winging up with flossy
12 - FelixBast - All signs point to Hero.
The desert planet of Bowie has no naturally forming atmospheric precipitation.
A terraforming program was started two years ago to make this mining colony more habitable, but another twenty years will pass before this process can produce any rain.
Currently, water is shipped from nearby systems in large convoys. These convoys consist of larger than life pilots who ship, not for profit, but for the love of “trucking”. The ships belonging to these miraculous heroes can be recognised by the livery proudly displayed on the hull.
A simple logo consisting of a sun with an arrow, pointing towards an outpost.
13 - Futuristic Kung Fu - Big Damm's miracle logo
In the Kamito system, there lived a man who flew a Keelback and knew every barman in the sector. He wore a badge on his chest. The logo on this badge resembled an upside down bottle. Legend said whatever hit that logo, the man wouldn't be hurt. The man's name was Oi-Dammagalmautasion-Pisayhkioskioaw-Wann-ka, but everyone called him Big Damm.
One day, the Feds tried to arrest him. They were armed with the new TJ-31 blaster. Their leader, a cruel brute missing eight thirds of his teeth, shot Big Damm right on that logo.
Big Damm, he fell.
Big Damm, he rose.
14 - CMDR FluffyBun - Little Cause for Celebrations
Fluffybun’s CQC simulator was taking shape. Though rather than modelling structures, Fluffy decided model various chocolate bars instead. The resulting arena was beyond the miraculous dreams of Willy Wonka.
On the first test flight, Fluffybun was being shot at by AI ships from all directions.
“I need to get away from this” squeaked our hero, and flew towards a power-up, one of the big damn Cadbury’s miniature heroes. Fluffy was certain of the power-up he was flying toward, he knew there was a logo but couldn’t quite see it. Irrespective, he hurtled into it.
KABOOM
“Fudge?! I wanted a Boost!”
15 - Cmder Gale - False Advertising
"Good Morning Dresler. Wakeup with Maxil Techtronics: Every day, on the dot."
I open my eyes. The screen flashes six-fifteen Centauri standard time. I smell stimulant. The gas will be extra on my account.
I roll out of the bunk, dress in today's overalls and activate a headset. The Rockforth Corporation logo appears on my chest. Make your vacation special. As if I could afford one!
Doesn’t matter, adverts aren’t for me.
“Dres, the toilets are blocked. Deck four.”
“Okay.”
Maybe there’ll be a rich trader desperate to 'have a pee' and book a holiday?
Earn myself a bonus?
Fat g chance.
16 - Hot Sporran - Despicable Mi
Mi rolled from the smoking cockpit onto the shore and peered across the lapping water at the enemy target. The urgent destruction mission now in tatters, Mi looked up at the inverted cockpit hatch thinking, "big dam... Mi rows in the hatch?".
Mi's comms alert triggered. "Mi, you on your way?" crackled Yu through the smoldering ship speaker.
Connecting via suit comms Mi replied, "Yu? What?"
"It's Pizza night Mi".
Mi swore. "I've crashed on mission... why didn't you remind me Yu"
"Not my job Mi", replied Yu "flying eh, you chose to go low there didn't you? Stupid Mi"
17 - CMDR Texas Stu - Untitled
It was just TOO big. Nothing will stop it.
It will completely annihilate everyone and there is nothing to be done about it.
It would take something like a huge wall but there is not enough time, even IF it were possible.
Everyone on the platform waited for the inevitable.
Then, from opposite directions they came, blocking all light but that they make
Thousands of Anacondas.
Locking together as if they were welded and creating a huge dam/wall to protect the platform!
Wing Leader Alpha, "You know what that makes us, don't ya?"
Wingman Four, "Big Dam Heroes, Sir!"
18 - insanephoton - Shopping
Alien and Kow had spent hours browsing the toy shop looking for a suitable Empire day gift for little Simoof. reaching the model spaceship aisle Kow stopped abruptly
"Do you notice anything about that red Python?"
"There's some kind of logo on it. What of it?" Alien answered in a bemused tone.
"Yeah, it's a 'Big Damn Heroes' decal on it, do you know what that means?"
"Enlighten me."
"They're incredibly rare, collectors pay an absolute fortune for them"
"How much?"
"Pristine examples can go for up to twelve thousand"
"No, how much to buy it?"
"twenty creds"
"A miracle"
Last edited by a moderator:
