Sorry, couldn't resist
I'll try to be more helpful:
First, that security ships lose target on a criminal with a much higher bounty and go after you is not intended. However it takes much work to change this behaviour, so no ETA.
Your point is reasonable, however I see no way to make this work. You get a small bounty for attacking a ship and a much higher when you destroy it. If the small bounty would not lead to a wanted status, you could get no help from security ships when getting interdicted by a pirate. Your wingmates would not be allowed to help you either, because the criminal would get the wanted status only after he destroyed you. That would be much worse than the current mechanic.
So I think we should focus on two things:
1. Don't attack clear/unscanned ships.
2. Further tweaks to FF mechanic.
I personally think we don't need a FF mechanic at all - everyone handling a weapon with multiple MW power of destruction should do this with caution. However I understand that the more casual player does not like this and I can live with it as long as it is done in a reasonable manner.