Calling all pirates, share your opening pirate spiel with us!

Strangepork

Strangepork
Many a good pirate engages their prey with a little opening line of light hearted piratey chit-chat.

If you're a good pirate, please share your chat with us here.

Please spare us the arrgh bit, most kindly...


EDIT: Now including further seemingly random pirate musings, horse-play and general roguish banter.
 
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Lane1572

Lane1572
"I don't want to shoot you. I simply want a small donation of cargo. Power down for scan and survive."

then pew pew if they start to run until their shields are down

"Stop and let's do this the easy way"

then with their hull around 5%

"last chance, don't die for cargo"
 

Lateralus

Lateralus
"Greetings commander, please cut your engines for scan. Attempting to escape is not advised..."

Purposely vague so they don't know why they've been interdicted. Once they're stopped I make my demands.
 

Therinfluffs

T
"Empty your Hold, turn your head and cough."

"Can I get a hit of that -insert rare drug commodity here' "

.. I hate myself sometimes
 

TheGrimCorsair

T
"Throttle zeroed and hardpoints deployed or your dead before your FSD cools off."

If I were, y'know, robbing them. I haven't really done that, though, so my normal opening is [weapons fire].
 

Ziggy Stardust

Ziggy Stardust
Kezha said:
"Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and saviour chtulu?"

If they laugh, do nothing, if they do not laugh, tell them you are dissapointed and leave
Click to expand...


zaNrmTx.jpg
 

Arry

Arry
'Yes; ok. One moment; I have to sort out the mess in my cargo hold and I'll be right with you'. Now where is that boost button.
 

El Dragoon!

Banned
El Dragoon!
"give me cargo, or death"

*they give me cargo*

"transaction incomplete, your sentence is death, good day"


its a pirate/grief scenario , some times i blow up the cargo in front of them for the lulz
 

geoffrey.hdt

geoffrey.hdt
I still have my pirate macros somewhere...but I gave up on PvP piracy long time ago...too much frustration due to combat logging, foolish preys running away in a straight line and crying griefer or, when the negotiation happens, feeling like your are being given charity (but not too much).
I am having more fun to simply interdict and kill worthy preys (for any reason that i find valid depending of my mood), at least it's straight.

All it would take for piracy to get interesting would be to change how hatch breakers work, with class 1 / 3 /5 / 7 dropping 5 / 10 / 20 / 40 canisters. And in a compact cluster, not in an endless line!

This way, it would be expected for your prey to (learn to) flee as soon as possible before you manage to attach too many hatch breakers.
Also, there would be less fear of the pirate going for a free kill since the longer you keep the prey alive, the more hatch breakers you can attach.
It would also give the choice for the trader to choose between shield boosters or point defense turrets (which would give a reason for the pirate to launch multiple hatch breakers).
...and, if you prefer negotiating via the Comm panel, you can still do it.

Arf...sorry, I just wanted to whine a bit. I don't even want to create this kind of suggestion threads anymore...it's hopeless. Elite : you deal with it or you hate it.
And I'm not even talking about PvP bounty hunting...
 
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Lane1572

Lane1572
geoffrey.hdt said:
I still have my pirate macros somewhere...but I gave up on PvP piracy long time ago...too much frustration due to combat logging, foolish preys running away in a straight line and crying griefer or, when the negotiation happens, feeling like your are being given charity (but not too much).
I am having more fun to simply interdict and kill worthy preys (for any reason that i find valid depending of my mood), at least it's straight.

All it would take for piracy to get interesting would be to change how hatch breakers work, with class 1 / 3 /5 / 7 dropping 5 / 10 / 20 / 40 canisters. And in a compact cluster, not in an endless line!

This way, it would be expected for your prey to (learn to) flee as soon as possible before you manage to attach too many hatch breakers.
Also, there would be less fear of the pirate going for a free kill since the longer you keep the prey alive, the more hatch breakers you can attach.
It would also give the choice for the trader to choose between shield boosters or point defense turrets (which would give a reason for the pirate to launch multiple hatch breakers).
...and, if you prefer negotiating via the Comm panel, you can still do it.

Arf...sorry, I just wanted to whine a bit. I don't even want to create this kind of suggestion threads anymore...it's hopeless. Elite : you deal with it or you hate it.
And I'm not even talking about PvP bounty hunting...
Click to expand...

Outside of the annoyance of their running away scared leaving a trail of cargo I haven't had any issues getting a couple of hatch breakers in before they escape the mass lock. Then I just park and let the collection limplets do their thing. Once I get the donation of cargo I seek I let them go.

I once had a guy try and cargo scoop them back up while he was still dropping them out the back. It was pretty adorable
 
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