Calling all pirates, share your opening pirate spiel with us!

[body count]

I say let earth die. I will be safe in my fortress. And shame on you!

see that's what happens when you're away from mother gaia for too long

 

[Futuristic Kung Fu]

see that's what happens when you're away from mother gaia for too long

Perhapsss. The fact remainsss that I fill be sssafe in my fortresss.

 

[GluttonyFang]

*Sneezes*

I need a top hat to keep my warm @_@

 

[Jukelo]

I could give you my opening line, but then I'd have to rob you.