"Cmdr the pirates appear to be targeting our canopy, can I recommend a new strategy?"
"What strategy would that be Astra?"
"RUN sir!"
"Run? But we have them right where we want them!"
"Fair enough sir, but I didn't realise staring down both barrels was right where we wanted them sir, especially when our canopy integrity is below 10%. I stand corrected sir, the canopy is now at zero and we have a canopy breach sir. That gives us 5 minutes sir, shall I plot a course to the nearest station"
"Err, no Astra, the dirty pirate is on 12% hull, this shouldn't take too long!
"I have to correct you sir, it's Dirty Truckers Sir, not pirates, the pirates have a completely different prefix, one which I am programmed not to say and which I must punish you if you utter it sir."
"Yes fair enough Astra, not a good time to point that out, I'm having a bit of trouble getting the fu... pirate to stay in my sights".
"Yes sir, I can see that sir. 4 minutes left sir, you might want to start using your boost sir"
"Thank you for the piloting lessons Astra, most helpful! Now would you mind putting us in full reverse please?"
"Absolutely sir, although you do realise that running away is quicker using forward engines and IF you do manage to kill the pirate sir, you'll still need to clear the mass lock of the asteroid field before we can jump to super-cruise. 3 minutes sir"
"Thank you once again for the reminder Astra. RIGHT TAKE THAT YOU DIRTY, I mean FU, I mean PIRATE!!!!"
"Well done Cmdr, you managed to kill him and with 2 minutes 30 seconds of air remaining, I do hope you enjoy the remaining 150 seconds you have left as a pilot."
"Astra, full power to forward engines please, we can still make it to that station, it's only 150ls away."
"Yes sir, but knowing your docking skills it may as well be Hutton Orbital sir... Well done sir, 55 seconds left and the station is only 9km away, you might actually do this."
"Thank you Astra, now would you please request docking permission?"
"Will do sir! Hoard Orbital, this is Faulcon deLacy Charlie Uniform Lima requesting permission to dock"
"Faulcon deLacy Charlie Uniform Lima, permission denied, all pads are currently occupied"
"Occupied, occupied, you *&%$ %$£&*."
"Sir you do realise that if the ship wasn't about to blow up in 5 seconds I would have to initiate the self destruct button? Such language cannot be tolerated."
I do hope you all enjoyed this short story, it's actually based on a true event which happened last night. Upon arrival at Hoard Orbital (which is in fact a platform station) with 55 seconds of air remaining I was kindly denied docking permission. Thank Dogs for mode switching. I managed to touch down with 5 seconds air and one hell of a story to tell. Cmdr Cula-ta signing out.
"What strategy would that be Astra?"
"RUN sir!"
"Run? But we have them right where we want them!"
"Fair enough sir, but I didn't realise staring down both barrels was right where we wanted them sir, especially when our canopy integrity is below 10%. I stand corrected sir, the canopy is now at zero and we have a canopy breach sir. That gives us 5 minutes sir, shall I plot a course to the nearest station"
"Err, no Astra, the dirty pirate is on 12% hull, this shouldn't take too long!
"I have to correct you sir, it's Dirty Truckers Sir, not pirates, the pirates have a completely different prefix, one which I am programmed not to say and which I must punish you if you utter it sir."
"Yes fair enough Astra, not a good time to point that out, I'm having a bit of trouble getting the fu... pirate to stay in my sights".
"Yes sir, I can see that sir. 4 minutes left sir, you might want to start using your boost sir"
"Thank you for the piloting lessons Astra, most helpful! Now would you mind putting us in full reverse please?"
"Absolutely sir, although you do realise that running away is quicker using forward engines and IF you do manage to kill the pirate sir, you'll still need to clear the mass lock of the asteroid field before we can jump to super-cruise. 3 minutes sir"
"Thank you once again for the reminder Astra. RIGHT TAKE THAT YOU DIRTY, I mean FU, I mean PIRATE!!!!"
"Well done Cmdr, you managed to kill him and with 2 minutes 30 seconds of air remaining, I do hope you enjoy the remaining 150 seconds you have left as a pilot."
"Astra, full power to forward engines please, we can still make it to that station, it's only 150ls away."
"Yes sir, but knowing your docking skills it may as well be Hutton Orbital sir... Well done sir, 55 seconds left and the station is only 9km away, you might actually do this."
"Thank you Astra, now would you please request docking permission?"
"Will do sir! Hoard Orbital, this is Faulcon deLacy Charlie Uniform Lima requesting permission to dock"
"Faulcon deLacy Charlie Uniform Lima, permission denied, all pads are currently occupied"
"Occupied, occupied, you *&%$ %$£&*."
"Sir you do realise that if the ship wasn't about to blow up in 5 seconds I would have to initiate the self destruct button? Such language cannot be tolerated."
I do hope you all enjoyed this short story, it's actually based on a true event which happened last night. Upon arrival at Hoard Orbital (which is in fact a platform station) with 55 seconds of air remaining I was kindly denied docking permission. Thank Dogs for mode switching. I managed to touch down with 5 seconds air and one hell of a story to tell. Cmdr Cula-ta signing out.
