Did you know that...
- Federal degenerates have robot machines brew their coffee instead of hard-working slaves honorably working off their debt. One can't even begin to imagine how awful that must taste, but word on the spacelanes is the terrible local brews of Orrere are considered a delicacy in core Federal systems.
- The Federal government is so conflicted that it needs the President to have a Shadow President that opposes her every action and probably wants to murder her in cold blood for all he says.
- The Federation's answer to the stylish and functional Imperial Clipper is... the Federal Dropship. Did you know the Federal Dropship was initially designed as a robotic coffee brewing machine? It certainly flies and looks like one. So much for Federal efficiency.
- The current Eagle model being sold at shipyards is based off the Imperial Eagle Mk3. Did you know the Federation designed their own version of the Eagle, the Eagle Mk2? The designers, in their Federal wisdom, had apparently forgotten to include proper retro thrusters to the ship. The Eagle Mk3 was, of course, flawless. It also had better seats.
- One of the most profitable items of trade in the spacelanes, that is, progenitor cells, are banned in Federal space, because "the rich could abuse them", but in a secret survey run by an Imperial agency that shall remain unnamed, it was confirmed that 9 out of 10 government officials in the Federation have undergone extensive life-extending therapy including the use of progenitor cells? A certain diplomat, who staunchly opposes Imperial slavery, was found to have as much as 30 unregulated slaves working in an undeclared private retreat on a far-away frontier planet (stay tuned to Galnet for news on this).
Would you like to know more? Head to your closest Imperial Information Clerk. There are many ways you could help spread the light that is Imperial civilization. Blow away the darkness of Federal corruption, today!
- Federal degenerates have robot machines brew their coffee instead of hard-working slaves honorably working off their debt. One can't even begin to imagine how awful that must taste, but word on the spacelanes is the terrible local brews of Orrere are considered a delicacy in core Federal systems.
- The Federal government is so conflicted that it needs the President to have a Shadow President that opposes her every action and probably wants to murder her in cold blood for all he says.
- The Federation's answer to the stylish and functional Imperial Clipper is... the Federal Dropship. Did you know the Federal Dropship was initially designed as a robotic coffee brewing machine? It certainly flies and looks like one. So much for Federal efficiency.
- The current Eagle model being sold at shipyards is based off the Imperial Eagle Mk3. Did you know the Federation designed their own version of the Eagle, the Eagle Mk2? The designers, in their Federal wisdom, had apparently forgotten to include proper retro thrusters to the ship. The Eagle Mk3 was, of course, flawless. It also had better seats.
- One of the most profitable items of trade in the spacelanes, that is, progenitor cells, are banned in Federal space, because "the rich could abuse them", but in a secret survey run by an Imperial agency that shall remain unnamed, it was confirmed that 9 out of 10 government officials in the Federation have undergone extensive life-extending therapy including the use of progenitor cells? A certain diplomat, who staunchly opposes Imperial slavery, was found to have as much as 30 unregulated slaves working in an undeclared private retreat on a far-away frontier planet (stay tuned to Galnet for news on this).
Would you like to know more? Head to your closest Imperial Information Clerk. There are many ways you could help spread the light that is Imperial civilization. Blow away the darkness of Federal corruption, today!
