Community Event / Creation Drabble Poll: A New Species
- Thread starter Frank
- Start date
which foot?
01 more common than you'd think. -- Yaffle
“Adaptation. That’s the key thing.”
“Huh?”
“You all bang on about new species, they are everywhere. You want a bug-eyed monster, a little green man, but you forget about basics. On this very station, right now, is a new species of rat. It’s adapted to low-g with new blood, lymph, bone and muscular systems. It’s not Rattus Rattus gentlemen, it’s Rattus caelus. In every sense it’s a new species. It’s been isolated and subjected to selection pressures. This is what you get. It can no longer mate and produce viable offspring with its earthbound equivalents.”
“Sounds just like McCready, sir.”
02 Friendship -- The Lone Gunman
The exploration ship amitié had landed several hours ago
The crew had done an extensive planet wide scan from orbit
They found the new species, Trillions of them roaming slowly,
A cross between a large cat and a docile rabbit
"Cute arnt they?" said Curtis
"Yep sure are" replied Ramsay holding one
Beautiful brown eyes looked up at him as he examined it all over
"Well better do the test" and Ramsay threw it on the fire!
Later agreeing it was very tasty, Gordon Ramsey called in the industrial harvesters
Well there were billions of starving Imperial citizens to feed!
03 How a New Species Joined the Confederation of Worlds and Prospered -- Darkoba
I'd been exploring, way beyond the frontier.
I awoke in a spot-lit cage in a large hall, surrounded by tiers of occupied seats. The occupants were, well, different - all very different.
Memory seeped back; unknown vessel, tractor-beam, unconsciousness. Now this!
A sound in my head "What is your species?"
"Human" I spoke. An audible murmur circled the hall.
"Sentience test: There is only one way out of the cage. Find it or die there."
They waited. I pondered. Was humanity at stake?
Ah!
I opened the unlocked gate and walked out.
"Welcome, Human" I heard.
The trade profits were immense.
04 Om Nom Nom -- Musashi
My most lucrative customer appears at the door. With the right amount of obsequiousness, I usher him to his chair. My establishment is a favourite of those rich enough to afford the fine delicacies and exotic dishes we serve, and he is a connoisseur of new species. He's in for a treat today!
With a flourish, I reveal a steaming platter piled with strips of succulent meat, grilled to perfection, and brushed with my secret marinade.
His mandibles quiver as he clicks at me.
"The indigenous name?" I repeat, flicking through my notes with a claw. "They call themselves . . . humans."
05 Can I name it? -- Psykokow
Dear Commander Psykokow,
Thank you for your recent letter to register the new ‘creature’ you had found under the name “Kows flappycat”.
We sadly cannot accept your registration. Here are the findings of our specialist investigation team who examined your ‘creature’.
1. Creature is of feline origin
2. Hair is matted with faeces
3. Creature is too big to fly.
4. The Creature is a dead cat, with wings glued to its back.
In conclusion, the next time you flush your pet down the loo, don’t glue wings on it and then send it to us.
Yours sincerely
Dr Peestov
06 Exploring the fringe -- W4rSkuLL
Mapping new unknown worlds, wasnt Xavias funniest work.
In this strange world, on the fringe of known space.
They had only come along some crazy, jumping, round looking things.
Which were "Mjauing". It werent cats.
Cutting through the dense jungle she could feel something stinging her ass cheek.
One of the mapping crew stopped and gasped.
"Xavia, there is something hanging from your, well, tush".
She gently removed it. What was this? It was cute.
"Njam, njam" it said. It kind of smiled.
A new species need its name. And it became the Xassis.
Cute, fluffy and liked to suck.
07 The Simulacrum -- Gibbonici
Under the microscanner the ancient statue's surface appeared as a landscape of ls and ripples which belied a technological craftsmanship that Horbin had never seen before.
"Absolutely fascinating," he said. "Where was it found?"
"The Corselein Asteroids, 35.4AUs from Spica," DeSoto replied.
"This... This may be evidence of an ancient spacefaring race."
The mysterious sculpture stared at them through its manifold stone eyes, its triple-jaws agape as if frozen in the act of calling to them.
Neither man knew that as they studied it, the statue was beginning its aeons-awaited metamorphosis from its mineral state into its primordial organic form.
08 Tra la la -- Frank
Tikatika hates the Giant. He asks the Builders for help. They free him from his chains and Build him legs with which to run and hide. They finish just in time. The Giant clomps in and searches for his runaway slave.
Tikatika is lonely. He asks the Builders to make him a companion, one cleverer than himself. He also wants his friend to have the ability to Build so he could make more friends.
Frank clomps back into the surgery and has another look around. He's having a senior moment. He was sure he'd left his watch beside Minerva's nanostitcher.
09 We never learn..... -- Philip Coutts
The luxurious pelts of the creatures would make them all extremely rich. The colours were dazzling gold and silver and the pelts felt silky and smooth like touching warm air. They had slaughtered hundreds of thousands of the stupidly accommodating beasts. The ground ran with their blood and was littered with carcasses, shame that they meat tasted so horribly acidic. Never mind, what was a little waste compared to the profit that would be made. The call finally came that there were no more creatures to be found, time to move on there were new species to be discovered elsewhere……
10 Seeing is believing -- DaddyHoggy
Darvus woke the rest of the day shift crew up with his screaming.
"I can't see!" he wailed into the semi-darkness.
Marken switched on the main lights and could see Darvus clawing at his face. Marken along with Phelps pulled the hands away to get a better look and to stop Darvus doing any more damage to his flesh.
They reeled back from the scores of little legs sticking out of Darvus' otherwise empty eye sockets.
The station's doctors said later it was a new species of arachnid, equipped with a powerful anaesthetic and a liking for the human eyeball.
11 Drop the Dead Tree Grub -- Darren Grey
It was another slow day for the Lave Gazette, and George was leafing through the submissions file to find something headline-worthy.
‘All we get is trash here,’ he moaned to Larry, his assistant. ‘Look at this… “Thargoids got me pregnant” or hey, how about this, “Technician mutilated by vending machine” – boring, samey trash. I mean sure, they’ll do for a sub-story, but I need something mega for the front page!’
‘What about this, boss?’ asked Larry, peeking over George’s shoulder. ‘Novel breed of Lavian tree grub discovered…’
‘What? You nuts, boy? Everyone loves tree grubs, but they ain’t news pieces!’
12 The gift of life. --Scorpio
Commanders, ever wanted a ships cat to provide some stimulating conversation on those long journeys, or a parrot that is fluent in 2 million languages?. Look no further than Zenotec, the Federations premier genetic engineers.
What can you buy for that special person who has everything?
Our Technicians at Zenotec's state of the art Laboratories can provide that unique gift that will ensure the clouds of disappointment will never dull the sunshine of your life.
A giant kitten that can faithfully reproduce all her favorite Carpenter classics ?, a rideable unicorn ?. Yes, we can make their dreams a reality.
All these things and a thousand new species are currently available in our spring catalogue
13 Metamorphosis -- insanephoton
It's been days since I was stung by that thing.
We were following a jungle trail down on the planet, when out of nowhere, something hit me and I was on the ground, screaming in agony. The others got me back to the ship and I've been in the medical bay ever since.
The doc seems worried, some kind of parasite he thinks.
Something strange is happening, I can feel my body changing. I see my latest test results. No! It can't be true. A glance at my reflection confirms the worst.
Result: Species Unknown.
I am no longer human.
14 New species. -- Ian Phillips
Hunting for new species.
I've made a career out of it.
I'm looking for partners to join me on my 'BIG Game' finding expedition. This is my advert for the jobs page.
"Wanted. Resourceful men (or women) for extremely hazardous venture.
Journey far outside the core to 'Dangerous' space.
Long months of solitude and deprivation on unexplored planets. Planetary survival skills essential.
Success means becoming a shareholder in expedition profits.
Contact 'Big Game Finders' on this board."
Always works. It's easy knowing when I've found a new big game species, My 'partners' have been eaten by them!
Shareholders? No way!
15 A Crap One -- Bikky
Along it came, the much awaited release of wandblows eight. A new age of computing microtechnology, an entire new breed of young geek out there.
Swishing nano-technology, virtual interfaces. It went down a storm. Well actually it went down like a viper in a nova. People stayed away from it in droves. Many who bought the new era of technology for their offspring found that the offspring had soon upgraded to the previous version.
Now, mere months on, is word of a new generation. Minisoft are ditching their latest child, and are set to release a new species, Next Year!
16 Spikey Situation -- Luniticisi
The sound was muffled through the quarantine bulkhead, the comms unit hadn't been serviced since the ships Science officer LT-James lost control of his previous 'new find' and almost got sucked out into space.
"You don't understand commander, this is different, it isn't hostile" LT-James held up his find to the view screen "look!"
"I don't care what it looks like... It's not coming on my ship!"
"But sir, after extensive testing I can honestly say, this creature is harmless!"
"What's that?" the commander asked, pointing toward the now erect spikes on the creatures back.
"Oh dear!...
...not again...
.............MEDIC!"
“Adaptation. That’s the key thing.”
“Huh?”
“You all bang on about new species, they are everywhere. You want a bug-eyed monster, a little green man, but you forget about basics. On this very station, right now, is a new species of rat. It’s adapted to low-g with new blood, lymph, bone and muscular systems. It’s not Rattus Rattus gentlemen, it’s Rattus caelus. In every sense it’s a new species. It’s been isolated and subjected to selection pressures. This is what you get. It can no longer mate and produce viable offspring with its earthbound equivalents.”
“Sounds just like McCready, sir.”
02 Friendship -- The Lone Gunman
The exploration ship amitié had landed several hours ago
The crew had done an extensive planet wide scan from orbit
They found the new species, Trillions of them roaming slowly,
A cross between a large cat and a docile rabbit
"Cute arnt they?" said Curtis
"Yep sure are" replied Ramsay holding one
Beautiful brown eyes looked up at him as he examined it all over
"Well better do the test" and Ramsay threw it on the fire!
Later agreeing it was very tasty, Gordon Ramsey called in the industrial harvesters
Well there were billions of starving Imperial citizens to feed!
03 How a New Species Joined the Confederation of Worlds and Prospered -- Darkoba
I'd been exploring, way beyond the frontier.
I awoke in a spot-lit cage in a large hall, surrounded by tiers of occupied seats. The occupants were, well, different - all very different.
Memory seeped back; unknown vessel, tractor-beam, unconsciousness. Now this!
A sound in my head "What is your species?"
"Human" I spoke. An audible murmur circled the hall.
"Sentience test: There is only one way out of the cage. Find it or die there."
They waited. I pondered. Was humanity at stake?
Ah!
I opened the unlocked gate and walked out.
"Welcome, Human" I heard.
The trade profits were immense.
04 Om Nom Nom -- Musashi
My most lucrative customer appears at the door. With the right amount of obsequiousness, I usher him to his chair. My establishment is a favourite of those rich enough to afford the fine delicacies and exotic dishes we serve, and he is a connoisseur of new species. He's in for a treat today!
With a flourish, I reveal a steaming platter piled with strips of succulent meat, grilled to perfection, and brushed with my secret marinade.
His mandibles quiver as he clicks at me.
"The indigenous name?" I repeat, flicking through my notes with a claw. "They call themselves . . . humans."
05 Can I name it? -- Psykokow
Dear Commander Psykokow,
Thank you for your recent letter to register the new ‘creature’ you had found under the name “Kows flappycat”.
We sadly cannot accept your registration. Here are the findings of our specialist investigation team who examined your ‘creature’.
1. Creature is of feline origin
2. Hair is matted with faeces
3. Creature is too big to fly.
4. The Creature is a dead cat, with wings glued to its back.
In conclusion, the next time you flush your pet down the loo, don’t glue wings on it and then send it to us.
Yours sincerely
Dr Peestov
06 Exploring the fringe -- W4rSkuLL
Mapping new unknown worlds, wasnt Xavias funniest work.
In this strange world, on the fringe of known space.
They had only come along some crazy, jumping, round looking things.
Which were "Mjauing". It werent cats.
Cutting through the dense jungle she could feel something stinging her ass cheek.
One of the mapping crew stopped and gasped.
"Xavia, there is something hanging from your, well, tush".
She gently removed it. What was this? It was cute.
"Njam, njam" it said. It kind of smiled.
A new species need its name. And it became the Xassis.
Cute, fluffy and liked to suck.
07 The Simulacrum -- Gibbonici
Under the microscanner the ancient statue's surface appeared as a landscape of ls and ripples which belied a technological craftsmanship that Horbin had never seen before.
"Absolutely fascinating," he said. "Where was it found?"
"The Corselein Asteroids, 35.4AUs from Spica," DeSoto replied.
"This... This may be evidence of an ancient spacefaring race."
The mysterious sculpture stared at them through its manifold stone eyes, its triple-jaws agape as if frozen in the act of calling to them.
Neither man knew that as they studied it, the statue was beginning its aeons-awaited metamorphosis from its mineral state into its primordial organic form.
08 Tra la la -- Frank
Tikatika hates the Giant. He asks the Builders for help. They free him from his chains and Build him legs with which to run and hide. They finish just in time. The Giant clomps in and searches for his runaway slave.
Tikatika is lonely. He asks the Builders to make him a companion, one cleverer than himself. He also wants his friend to have the ability to Build so he could make more friends.
Frank clomps back into the surgery and has another look around. He's having a senior moment. He was sure he'd left his watch beside Minerva's nanostitcher.
09 We never learn..... -- Philip Coutts
The luxurious pelts of the creatures would make them all extremely rich. The colours were dazzling gold and silver and the pelts felt silky and smooth like touching warm air. They had slaughtered hundreds of thousands of the stupidly accommodating beasts. The ground ran with their blood and was littered with carcasses, shame that they meat tasted so horribly acidic. Never mind, what was a little waste compared to the profit that would be made. The call finally came that there were no more creatures to be found, time to move on there were new species to be discovered elsewhere……
10 Seeing is believing -- DaddyHoggy
Darvus woke the rest of the day shift crew up with his screaming.
"I can't see!" he wailed into the semi-darkness.
Marken switched on the main lights and could see Darvus clawing at his face. Marken along with Phelps pulled the hands away to get a better look and to stop Darvus doing any more damage to his flesh.
They reeled back from the scores of little legs sticking out of Darvus' otherwise empty eye sockets.
The station's doctors said later it was a new species of arachnid, equipped with a powerful anaesthetic and a liking for the human eyeball.
11 Drop the Dead Tree Grub -- Darren Grey
It was another slow day for the Lave Gazette, and George was leafing through the submissions file to find something headline-worthy.
‘All we get is trash here,’ he moaned to Larry, his assistant. ‘Look at this… “Thargoids got me pregnant” or hey, how about this, “Technician mutilated by vending machine” – boring, samey trash. I mean sure, they’ll do for a sub-story, but I need something mega for the front page!’
‘What about this, boss?’ asked Larry, peeking over George’s shoulder. ‘Novel breed of Lavian tree grub discovered…’
‘What? You nuts, boy? Everyone loves tree grubs, but they ain’t news pieces!’
12 The gift of life. --Scorpio
Commanders, ever wanted a ships cat to provide some stimulating conversation on those long journeys, or a parrot that is fluent in 2 million languages?. Look no further than Zenotec, the Federations premier genetic engineers.
What can you buy for that special person who has everything?
Our Technicians at Zenotec's state of the art Laboratories can provide that unique gift that will ensure the clouds of disappointment will never dull the sunshine of your life.
A giant kitten that can faithfully reproduce all her favorite Carpenter classics ?, a rideable unicorn ?. Yes, we can make their dreams a reality.
All these things and a thousand new species are currently available in our spring catalogue
13 Metamorphosis -- insanephoton
It's been days since I was stung by that thing.
We were following a jungle trail down on the planet, when out of nowhere, something hit me and I was on the ground, screaming in agony. The others got me back to the ship and I've been in the medical bay ever since.
The doc seems worried, some kind of parasite he thinks.
Something strange is happening, I can feel my body changing. I see my latest test results. No! It can't be true. A glance at my reflection confirms the worst.
Result: Species Unknown.
I am no longer human.
14 New species. -- Ian Phillips
Hunting for new species.
I've made a career out of it.
I'm looking for partners to join me on my 'BIG Game' finding expedition. This is my advert for the jobs page.
"Wanted. Resourceful men (or women) for extremely hazardous venture.
Journey far outside the core to 'Dangerous' space.
Long months of solitude and deprivation on unexplored planets. Planetary survival skills essential.
Success means becoming a shareholder in expedition profits.
Contact 'Big Game Finders' on this board."
Always works. It's easy knowing when I've found a new big game species, My 'partners' have been eaten by them!
Shareholders? No way!
15 A Crap One -- Bikky
Along it came, the much awaited release of wandblows eight. A new age of computing microtechnology, an entire new breed of young geek out there.
Swishing nano-technology, virtual interfaces. It went down a storm. Well actually it went down like a viper in a nova. People stayed away from it in droves. Many who bought the new era of technology for their offspring found that the offspring had soon upgraded to the previous version.
Now, mere months on, is word of a new generation. Minisoft are ditching their latest child, and are set to release a new species, Next Year!
16 Spikey Situation -- Luniticisi
The sound was muffled through the quarantine bulkhead, the comms unit hadn't been serviced since the ships Science officer LT-James lost control of his previous 'new find' and almost got sucked out into space.
"You don't understand commander, this is different, it isn't hostile" LT-James held up his find to the view screen "look!"
"I don't care what it looks like... It's not coming on my ship!"
"But sir, after extensive testing I can honestly say, this creature is harmless!"
"What's that?" the commander asked, pointing toward the now erect spikes on the creatures back.
"Oh dear!...
...not again...
.............MEDIC!"
A foot is an old Imperial measurement. I might be wrong here but I believe it's an old hunting term. The landed gentry wanted to wait until their gamebirds were big. So they would wait until the Grouse was the same length as the Laird's foot before they'd go out with their blunderbusses to blow them off the trees. "The game is afoot" meant "grab your gun and start blasting"
nice ... 
This is hard. Such a broad spectrum of excellent drabbles - the deep, the philosophical, the genuinely funny...
I think I may have to take one of each...
I think I may have to take one of each...
Ian Phillips
Volunteer Moderator
I think I need to make mine more explicit!
Ian Phillips
Volunteer Moderator
No. That's the whole point of the thing!
Ian Phillips
Volunteer Moderator
Maybe having the whole thing in CAPITOLS would help?
Sometimes dissecting a Drabble is as bad as explaining a joke, so I'll stick up spoiler shields...
I thought the intention was that the hunter was hiring partners to use as bait for the new species. If that's the case, then I don't think you could've made it clearer.
Is your intention that the hunter just kills off his partners to save splitting the finder's fees? Then I don't think there's any need for inverted commas around 'partners'.
Is there another meaning behind the Drabble I've missed?
Of course there's nothing wrong with a leaving things a little unclear. I've deliberately left a few of my Drabbles a little ambiguous, but none of those Drabbles got many votes.
Is your intention that the hunter just kills off his partners to save splitting the finder's fees? Then I don't think there's any need for inverted commas around 'partners'.
Is there another meaning behind the Drabble I've missed?
Of course there's nothing wrong with a leaving things a little unclear. I've deliberately left a few of my Drabbles a little ambiguous, but none of those Drabbles got many votes.
The inverted commas around 'partners' is essential to the drabble. It depicts, quite cleverly, the ironic difference between what the 'partners' really are, and what they think they are.
Yes it is a very good Drabble. It was on my shortlist of Drabbles to vote for. I'm quite surprised it's still sitting on zero.
I am getting bad at picking the winners. I did vote for DaddyHoggy, but my other two votes are not doing so well.
Surely it's good that you're spreading the votes around to the underappreciated?
I'm the opposite though - I've voted for the winner almost every time since we started the 3 vote system. Guess I just think along with the crowd
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Surely it's good that you're spreading the votes around to the underappreciated?
I'm the opposite though - I've voted for the winner almost every time since we started the 3 vote system. Guess I just think along with the crowd
I think the only time I haven't voted for the winner was when I won.
Yaffle
Volunteer Moderator
It's "amazing" what a difference a bit of punctuation can make
upon coming home from work I discovered I had no food for dinner so I had to eat the dogs
It's a close race, there is a chance that Psykokow could win