Elite: Training Wheels

This would be fairly easy to code in javascript. I'm imagining a game, let's call it "Elite: Training Wheels" -- a simulation based on what a lot of the commenters in the forums seem to want.

When you log in it gives you a deathstar. No, two death stars. And whenever you lose one it respawns. You can sell your deathstar for 1 zillion credits and it'll still respawn.

Trade is complicated. There are 4 zones that sell rares, in deathstar-hold sized loads, so you can make a squajillion credits each trip. Occasionally you will be interdicted by pirates but you can click the "KILL IT" button and the pirate is vaporized. Or you can become a pirate and interdict entire civilizations and click the "KILL IT" button to wipe them out. Either way, you collect a huge bounty or a mound of treasures. Since you can't lose a deathstar, you'll just accumulate more of those and since you can't lose any credits, you'll just accumulate more of those, too.

You can asteroid mine in your deathstar. By clicking "KILL IT" on a planet with rings, your deathstar will automatically suck up the ring and refine it into pure platinum or pizza, which you can sell in deathstar-loads at a squajillion credits a pop.

There will be a progression system starting with the title "zero" and working all the way up to "most spectacular amazing dude." Beyond that is an end-game where you can spend a jillion credits to add "totally" anywhere you want in your title.

There is a color overlay on the deathstars you can buy, and it's 32-bit, so there are billions of possible color combinations you can buy for your deathstar, at a measly million credits a pop.

Since deathstars are basically round balls with a texture-map, the game stores the size of your deathstar in a 32-bit code. Each power of two costs a bazillion credits. So for a mega whappa bazillion credits you can have a deathstar the size of the galaxy. So there are a billion possible ships you can have.

The game would have a checkbox that says "offline play" and when you check it it's indistinguishable from "online play" except that you need 4 petabytes of storage space on your hard drive to play it.

Oh, I forgot to mention how the game handles "griefers" -- if someone annoys you with their deathstar and you're in your deathstar you click "KILL IT" and you see a huge explosion. Meanwhile, they see you appear to disconnect from the game. That way neither of you actually gets hurt and both of you wind up really self-satisfied or angry depending on what kind of person you are. Of course if you're a "griefer" then you can target someone else's deathstar and click "KILL IT" and they'll appear to explode violently, and you'll appear (to them) to disconnect from the game. That way everyone winds up feeling like they "won"

And, last but far from least, the game would have a forum! In the forums, every time you post something complaining about a feature you get a "cookie" and when you get a jillion cookies you get to become the forum administrator. When you are the forum administrator, you can select other people's postings and click "KILL IT" and it will tell you that the offending posting has been deleted, but it won't actually be. That way everyone is happy and there's tons and tons of complaining.

I realize, as I write this, that the trading system I have outlined would be unbalanced and would probably need to be "nerfed" and the 32-bit universe-size deathstars might, too. But gameplay balance isn't my thing. The beauty of this game is that everyone wins!

elite-dangerous-banner.jpg
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Omg, the idea is actually terryfying and awesome at the same time!

I think you are foreseeing the future of the gaming industry...
 
I have one question. Is a sqajillion credits more or less than a jillion credits? Either way, I definitely want to play a game where I can earn a squajillion credits!! :D
 
I have one question. Is a sqajillion credits more or less than a jillion credits? Either way, I definitely want to play a game where I can earn a squajillion credits!! :D


We haven't defined what a "squajillion" credits is, but we'll do that in 1.1 release. There is a lot of delicious complaining on the forums about the numbering system. Everyone wants to know if they have more money than other players. that's really all they care about.

In 1.1 we'll probably introduce 32-bit square ships, too. But not colors for them. Because otherwise the players won't have anything to whinge about.
 
Last edited:
Your forum needs a couple of other games to compare E: TW to, a well established one (like EVE) and a vapourware one (like Star Citizen).

Somebody else will have to come up with vapour, but for the well established game I dare to suggest Progress Quest.
 
Back
Top Bottom