So how many blue do I need to mine ... pffft this grind does get tiresome
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I'd honestly just check inara for the logistics, mate. It's way too convoluted to break down here. That or try to make a start and use this thread to ask specific questions.
"how many blue prints... " is a tough question to answer. There are tons. Some less useful than others. If you're looking for build ideas, I suggest reading posts on the engineers forum here.
But you're probably too early to start that right now. Just check inara out to see what engineers exist and what you need to do to unlock them (it's bugged right now so you don't even need to do some of the unlocks). Pick something each one you want to level up can make, gather the stuff for those blue prints and get started making stuff for a ship. They'll soon level up to 3+ so you can unlock the next.
It is overwhelming, I know. It's not new player friendly whatsoever. I've been saying this for years but no one really cares. So you just need to take it one step at a time.
I'm hitting the same roadblock with my girlfriend. She's taken one look at me prospecting for my alt commander's first raw materials and she's just gone (literally tonight), "nah, just don't fancy that at all" and we left it to go do EDO stuff again.
I'm convinced most players get seriously turned off by it. But if you do want to upgrade your ships then you'll need to eat the big frog and get on with it. Several big frogs. Repeatedly.
Aim to get your FSD upgraded first (so Elvira or Farseer). I recommend Elvira because she leads to Palin (best engine upgrades). You'll want to make the fsd jump range blue print with mass manager. Inara will tell you what you'll need (or visit the engineer and check it out there).