General / Off-Topic How do I deal with my schoolyard bullies now being better off than me?

[Sir.Tj]

Firstly, don't worry about what others think or do, plan your own life out.

Consider contacting a charity like mind (or just google)who go a fantastic job and enquire about how to get into employment and what hey can do to help.

Forget the bullies they're not worth it.

Take control of your own life.

Long story short, I've ended up looking after a extra child who due to her family problems has left her physically and mentally unwell and although she struggles every day I give her sympathy,. support and a bloody good kick up the backside when required.

Start believing that you can be better than you think you are, it all starts with you.

Grab life by it's (Ahems) and get the help you need.

 

[Rob At Work]

Some of the cleverest and most influential people ever had/have Asperger's or a form of it.

Work out your genius, adapt and go for it.

 

[Robin of Spiritwood]

https://youarenotsosmart.com/2010/06/07/the-just-world-fallacy/

This might shed some light?

 

[StiTch]

But what happens when someone inevitably starts attacking me? Not necessarily punching me in the face, but whenever I try to do anything, someone *will* do everything in their power to stop me, or make me look bad. And they always succeed, because nobody takes me seriously, all because of these labels I've been given.

Sure, I can forget about them, but everyone else doesn't. So they see me as trash, and I'm tossed aside. There's nothing I can do if everyone says no.

Sure I can go outside. But then what? Any progression on that point is dependent on someone else. And because of my asperger's, everyone turns their nose up at me.

So yes, I am reliant on others, as I've got nothing to provide for myself. No skills, no cash, no friends... Nothing.

I actually consider the tough love so far to be quite restrained, so I'll be straight with you.

Get over yourself.

There are people that have their family taken away from them, are abused for holding someone's hand in public, have to watch their children die...and for the most part they somehow find the energy to keep breathing, living, and moving on.

The only real obstacle you have is a lack of motivation, and again...none of us can fix that for you. We can offer help or advice, but we cannot change your thought processes.

Stop relying on other people to do your thinking for you and stop blaming the rest of the world when things go wrong. It's you and you alone in that mind of yours: make what you want of it.

 

[GJ51]

But what happens when someone inevitably starts attacking me? Not necessarily punching me in the face, but whenever I try to do anything, someone *will* do everything in their power to stop me, or make me look bad. And they always succeed, because nobody takes me seriously, all because of these labels I've been given.

Sure, I can forget about them, but everyone else doesn't. So they see me as trash, and I'm tossed aside. There's nothing I can do if everyone says no.

Sure I can go outside. But then what? Any progression on that point is dependent on someone else. And because of my asperger's, everyone turns their nose up at me.

So yes, I am reliant on others, as I've got nothing to provide for myself. No skills, no cash, no friends... Nothing.

You are using "others" to excuse yourself from doing the things that you need to do to dig out. You have created elaborate defense mechanisms to justify not putting in the hard work you need to do to improve your sense of self-worth which is self-reinforcing and keeping you at the bottom of your personal rabbit hole.

How import are you to yourself? That's all that matters. You have to gain control and do the things we all have to do to be physically and mentally healthy, stable and productive. No one else can give that to you or take it away from you.

 

[Robin of Spiritwood]

https://www.wired.com/2010/07/happiness-and-money-2/

Richer people are more unhappy. The societal expectation we operate with is false. Although the world is not fair, the bad guys are not necessarily happier with their ill-gotten gains.

Edit: why do you think these guys were bullies? Because they were happy and well adjusted?
Nope. They have had problems from the start.

 

[Deleted member 110222]

You are using "others" to excuse yourself from doing the things that you need to do to dig out. You have created elaborate defense mechanisms to justify not putting in the hard work you need to do to improve your sense of self-worth which is self-reinforcing and keeping you at the bottom of your personal rabbit hole.

How import are you to yourself? That's all that matters. You have to gain control and do the things we all have to do to be physically and mentally healthy, stable and productive. No one else can give that to you or take it away from you.

How? How can I work and pay taxes if employers say "no, you have asperger's."?

I actually consider the tough love so far to be quite restrained, so I'll be straight with you.

Get over yourself.

There are people that have their family taken away from them, are abused for holding someone's hand in public, have to watch their children die...and for the most part they somehow find the energy to keep breathing, living, and moving on.

The only real obstacle you have is a lack of motivation, and again...none of us can fix that for you. We can offer help or advice, but we cannot change your thought processes.

Stop relying on other people to do your thinking for you and stop blaming the rest of the world when things go wrong. It's you and you alone in that mind of yours: make what you want of it.

This is true. But nothing I can do changes employers dismissing me because of asperger's.

How can I work and better myself, if I can't get a job, a job I can't get because I'm persecuted for a hereditary condition?

 

[Sir.Tj]

Ok I'm going to close this thread for one reason only.

Aloynya... Take the time to read through the replies and the links given and then contact charities who are setup to help people with Mental Health problems get into work.

It's all there in the thread, just read through it.