General / Off-Topic I'm a Carer

[psykokow]

Hi everyone, thanks for reading this.

I am a primary carer for my wife and to a lesser extent now my high functioning autistic son (ie he's got a good handle on it now).

So I wanted to ask you to help with raising awareness on how being a child or young adult in a family with complex care issues affects the children.

I have tried to shelter my kids as best I can from the effects of care, but even I sometimes forget that it only goes so far, so I am very proud of my daughter no matter how tough teens are to live with, she makes me proud when I see her working to help people understand her predicament and to try to help others in similar situations to hers.

Please do visit this link, please do give it a read and please do watch the video and like it and even share it.

I really appreciate your help in this matter and I hope it might go someway to encouraging other young carers to seek the support and challenge the systems that fail to support them.

http://www.fixers.org.uk/news/9582-11208/managing-multiple-lives.php

 

[JeffRyan]

Thanks,

My brother was also a young carer for my much loved nephew when he was born 13 years ago with various mental and physical handicaps.

We were told he would never walk, he runs.

We were told he would never talk, he's a cheeky wee bastit who emulates my wife's italian with uncanny accuracy.

And all of that is because my brother dedicated his life to his son at such a young age himself.

So I appreciated the video and the message a lot.

 

[MikeSnos]

I have some small inkling of what it must be like for you as I spent a couple of years dressing, feeding (cooking etc.) and fetching and carrying for my partner after her back problems immobilised her for a year and a half on two separate occasions in the past few years and also during the post-operative period (both on different discs and both successful!

Running will NOT feature in her fitness regime again, swimming is the way to go.

So, with all that in mind I take my hat off to you and give you all good wishes. It's hard work and I was lucky in that my spell as a carer was only temporary.

Glad your daughter is one of the good ones out there. There are many of them and it's a shame that its the minority that get all the attention that means 'kids of today' are labelled as 'no-hopers', '****less', 'un-caring' and 'entitled'... There are loads more who are just genuinely good, balanced human beings. Good for her

PS If you ever have a prolapsed Disc, it's not fun at all, especially when it presses heavily on the nerves etc and gives so much pain it drives you to attempt suicide twice! Get a Micro-discectomy pronto... If your Dr wavers be forceful, it's your back, your pain, your health and your sanity!

PPS : Have visited the site and looks great.

 

[natte hond]

such a unexpected heavy subject.
there's always more then meets the eye.
just have seen the site , its quite a wakeup call .

don't know what to say , so I just say hi.
and thank you for sharing.

 

[Minti2]

Amazing, as a carer for the deaf/blind i know how hard it can be at times, but these guys are so young, so mature and determined in helping their family's needs when most should be studying or enjoying their youth, much credit to them and great film

 

[deMangler]

Hi psykokow,
I was a young carer for my mother for many years before she died. We did not have a support network then the problem was brushed under the carpet in those days.
It is great to see this link and have the opportunity to help.
Thanks.
You, all you guys, rock!

 

[PIXEL]

http://www.fixers.org.uk/news/9582-11208/managing-multiple-lives.php

Thank you Mr 'psykokow'
My uncle cares 24/7 for my aunt who has MS (Multiple sclerosis) 20 plus years..
It's not often that I'm inspired by posts on this interweb thingy but yours has reminded me how people cope and are missed by their friends and family while caring for those they love.. while we just plod along with our lives. Time moves so quickly in our own little world. I am ashamed yet happy to be reminded of important things.
I'm going to get in touch with my uncle tomorrow, it's been a while.
Best wishes to you (commander) and your family.
Cheers.

 

[psykokow]

Fantastic responses it is the un noticed minority that spend their days caring and making sure people can 'live' what ever life they can with dignity and fun...

I would have been lost and have given up years ago IF it hadn't been for chance meetings with people who knew things and services..

Social work is overworked and innefficient where it isn't wholy inept.
I say that with full understanding that good social workers exist, and some places it works well.. Not here... 2 years to get one, then 3 of them left in the space of one year, oh its so much better if you can do without them.. but you can't..

So if you are alone and care for someone on your own.. find a carers centre.. or Local Area Coordinator team... Carers trust is a great place to start to get the information on what is ACTUALLY available to you..

I intend to promote and support these organisations as they are the lifeline and its imperative that people who need them find them.

They will help you navigate the nightmare of social work to get what you need...

I applaud these people, I applaud these organisations.. the things I have had their help to fight through is shocking but no surprise to fellow carers.
And to anyone out there.. if you are a carer and you have young children.. look for local young carers centres.. they can offer the support to your children you don't even know they need.

I have spent a lot of time at carers meetings and the people you meet and their daily grinds is only surpassed at their determination to improve the systems for people following in their stead..

It is an honour to call yourself a carer. It is an honour to know a carer..

 

[Sir.Tj]

HI guys,

Just donated to the link for Fixers given by Psykokow.

I have total respect to anyone who is a carer. The incredible hard work, dedication and love they give to another just goes to prove that there are still great people in the world.

Being a full time single Dad can be tough at times, but compared to the fantastic work you guys do its a breeze (even if one of them is a grumpy teenager atm .)

You should all be very, very proud of yourselves.

 

[Cody]

Being a carer can be harsh, warming, tragic - even comedic, but it is an eye-opener in many ways. At the other end of the timeline - for ten years, I was prime carer for my aged mother, watching helpless as dementia slowly took her away.

Kudos for spotlighting the carers, 'kow!

 

[Oss133]

Humble mode has been activated.

Donation has been made.

 

[psykokow]

Thanks for all the efforts everyone.

Amazing

 

[Affront7]

Hope you don't mind me posting this here

https://secure.38degrees.org.uk/page/speakout/child-protection-consultation?js=false

The UK government is looking to sell off Child Protection services to groups like G4S and others and you can see by how well G4S has done with Prisons and fraudulent claims over tagging in the past that this is really bad idea.

38 Degrees are asking people to add their opinion on the matter to the consultation before Friday via the link above.

Thank you and hope will help to block this.

 

[deusx_ophc]

thank you for sharing and posting psykokow. it is comforting to read the stories & thoughts added by others.

knowing the difficulties and harsh realities young carers and their families can face i am always torn between, on one side, love & admiration for all the good folks involved in caring and on the other side hate & disbelief that our societies en large treat people that are reliant on care like...

the thought of families & specially children having to pull through all the "health system" and administrative crap on top of their own impossible private situation makes me... just mad with anger. i see so many families & kids suffering so much more then needed because they lack basic information/understanding and a helping hand.

and i am at a loss as what to do, to do to really make a difference.

we are lucky ourselves (one of the few positives of living in germany), we get significant financial support in both health care and social care.

i took a 2 year sabbatical to care at home and between the two of us we decided that one of us would stay permanently "at home" to organise our family life. we are both (specially my wife) engaged in local charitable & government work for disabled/handicapped children.

but coming back to you & skye, as oss said, humble mode on and donated.

and a heartfelt Thank You! again mr. walcott


ps: our younger daughter has already developed social & care skills that defy her 5 years. it makes us proud (not a word i have much use for) and at the same time we have already taken steps to ensure she will not have to carry that burden once we are gone.