A lot of people seem to play this issue down, and feel it isn't that much of a big deal.
But just wait until Standard Beta and Gamma - this is going to be a HUGE issue. The docking isn't made for multiplayer.
That said - I saw in the DDF thread that there will be docking queues of some type eventually. If we get them, we will avoid most of this problem.
This was how i lost my original type 9 (20 minutes after I bought it). I was reset again back to a side winder. The fault was ultimately mine for not knowing about shields, and having them up for docking to stop this sort of thing. Now ( a week later ) I am back in a type 9 and better informed, but when you come up against something of equal mass, I would have been so annoyed if I was reset again to a sidewinder for a second time due to someone else's lack of patience.
But my issues aside, I can see what happened to me, happening again to a lesser informed commander. Buying a new ship and getting barged out the way on it;s maiden voyage. Perhaps a extra warning should be given at the point docking is granted to say "Recommend full shielding", like it does with the warning about landing gear not being down when over the assigned pad.
At least pilots (new and existing) are then given an extra chance of survival .