Stupid Arthur Dent!

concentric · Jul 18, 2018

I'm pretty sure many of you cmdrs have made a similar experience at one point but for me it's a first.
Was out prospecting when I stumbled upon a parked Anaconda.
Turned out it's Arthur Dent and he's wanted:

I was curious what would happen if I opened fire. Apparently mr. Dent was present at his ship as he deployed hardpoints:

He didn't seem overly clever however as the latter was his only reaction so I went on firing. After a while even an Eagle joined for assistance:

The Eagle pilot also fired missiles at the Conda but those got easily taken out by mr. Dent's four point defense turrets. The Eagle pilot even managed to get blown up himself, eventually. Instead of staying stationary he obviously flew directly through the Conda's firing arc...
After two times of synthesising srv ammo finally:

138,195 CR + a nice bonus:

Thanks a lot, mr. Dent!

ALEX CAOS · Jul 18, 2018

Say no more you killed Arthur Dent

MottiKhan · Jul 18, 2018

Ah yes. Good old Arthur. He's not the sharpest pencil in the desk. But don't worry. He'll be back.

Nick Sticks · Jul 18, 2018

I bet that spilled his tea.

Sysmon · Jul 18, 2018

I've encountered a couple of those too, loitering about on Deciat 4. A T-10 and later a Vulture. The latter pulled out its guns, but just sat there still. They should be fined for littering.

S

Vedmo · Jul 18, 2018

I've heard of Mr. Dent. He left his sick daughter in a Starport to go scour a planet for materials needed for an experimental remedy to her ailment. On his way out, in a justifiable rush he clipped a pirated sidewinder limping in for repairs to a nearly destroyed hull. Since Mr. Dent was speeding, he got a bounty when the pirate's Sidewinder blew up.

I'll let his daughter know she can die in peace knowing you delivered her father due justice.

IndigoWyrd · Jul 18, 2018

Last time I shot down Arthur Dent his bounty was 42.

concentric · Jul 18, 2018

Vedmo said:
I've heard of Mr. Dent. He left his sick daughter in a Starport to go scour a planet for materials needed for an experimental remedy to her ailment. On his way out, in a justifiable rush he clipped a pirated sidewinder limping in for repairs to a nearly destroyed hull. Since Mr. Dent was speeding, he got a bounty when the pirate's Sidewinder blew up.

I'll let his daughter know she can die in peace knowing you delivered her father due justice.

Now I'm feeling horrible

Winterwalker · Jul 18, 2018

concentric said:
Now I'm feeling horrible

Don't worry, she's a wanted Cmdr too. A notorious Vogon.

Vedmo · Jul 18, 2018

Winterwalker said:
Don't worry, she's a wanted Cmdr too. A notorious Vogon.

Yes, don't feel bad. She got sick from a load of slaves. Every responsible slaver knows to stay up to date on vaccines.

rcmil · Jul 18, 2018

The Anaconda didn't turn into a Beluga before it blew up did it? 42

concentric · Jul 18, 2018

Winterwalker said:
Don't worry, she's a wanted Cmdr too. A notorious Vogon.

Vedmo said:
Yes, don't feel bad. She got sick from a load of slaves. Every responsible slaver knows to stay up to date on vaccines.

Thanks guys, hope you're not just trying to console me...

Vasco Sapien · Jul 18, 2018

He forgot to bring his towel with him...

His fault.

Wyaston Hypatia · Jul 18, 2018

Unfortunately he'd locked up the onboard systems trying to make the perfect cup of tea, so there was nothing he could do when attacked.

Spaceman Si · Jul 18, 2018

Now he really is "the late Dent Arthur Dent"

PiLhEaD · Jul 18, 2018

Winterwalker said:
Don't worry, she's a wanted Cmdr too. A notorious Vogon.

I know a poem about that.

Cmdr Esteban · Jul 19, 2018

henry1491 said:
I know a poem about that.

I haven't checked, but I would expect that reciting Vogon poetry is against forum rules.

Zoltah-Talion · Jul 19, 2018

rcmil said:
The Anaconda didn't turn into a Beluga before it blew up did it? 42

LOL, that gets some rep.
Anyway perhaps it was really a bowl of petunias?

Spaceman Si · Jul 19, 2018

Oh no, not again....

Nick Sticks · Jul 19, 2018

Cmdr Esteban said:
I haven't checked, but I would expect that reciting Vogon poetry is against forum rules.

I got away with it!

Oh Federal grunt Beluga,
Thy Microtransactions are to me
As plurdled Generation Ships
On a Cobra Mark Three.
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting Thargoid Drones
And hooptiously Engineer me
With crinkly Sidewinders,
Or I will rend thee in the Galaxy Map with my Fragment Cannon
See if I don’t!

Edit: As heard on Lave Radio!
http://laveradio.com/lave-radio-episode-175/
About 1:47.

https://forums.frontier.co.uk/showthread.php/388810-Elite-Poetry?p=6104129&viewfull=1#post6104129