Welcome to your weekly dose of interesting reads. I must admit, after reading what this week's topic was, "Unexpected Results", I was surprised at how well the stories turned out.
Last week's winner was MrMogadon, not unexpectantly seeing how good his story was.
Psykokow hosts the Abraka-Drabble live reading show and comedy hour at 7pm GMT, Fridays on...
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and will also be uploaded to his You-tube channel & anywhere else he can inflict the world with our drabblings!
Please vote. And a warning to all of the contestants don't vote for yourselves. Anyone caught voting for themselves will be shocked by the results of their actions.
01 - T.j - UNEXPECTED RESULTS
Bbbut…bbbbut they stuttered, how is that possible?
Frank looked aghast, Splendour fainted and Edith had demanded a recount.
Simoof and Erik went to get a cloth to clean the puddle Simoof had accidental made when he'd hear the news.
The extreme levels of smugness were palpable.
It sat in the corner, grinning like the Cheshire Cat on happy pills sniffing a pound of cat nip for good measure...
‘Well,’ said Kow. ‘That’s the the drabbles finished then.' He stomped off to play with his kittens.
'Three votes eh? Put them in your pipes and smoke em.' Tj exclaimed with glee.
02 - Erik Marcaigh - First Contact
"Jump drive engaged."
Commander T.j looked over his Drabble once more then submitted it. The transmission, which the computer should have halted until he had exited hyperspace, was transmitted instead. Comprehensible English words and sentences stretched and twisted into sine waves, chirps, whistles, and an occasional fart noise.
The clueless Commander stared out the window at the streaks of light, imagining each one as a vote, raining down upon his elegantly worded story.
Suddenly, the starfield stopped and his ship was thrown out of the tunnel sideways, spinning.
A Thargoid ship, looming over his, sent a transmission.
"You Declare War?"
03 - Simoof - The Neck of Crop A list
The botanists sat nervously eying the envelope.
"Open it before I go insane. It's coming up for Friday teatime" shouted the ships commander.
The specimen was balanced in a chair in-front of a webcam, mishapen and lumpy and gross.
It had been widely studied and aggressively disputed.
Solanum tuberosum was the classification most had given it.
But these botanists had noticed some mutations, some peculiarities.
"This could be the new crop suitable for growth in some of the harshest environments!"
The captain ripped open the envelope and fell backwards, stunned.
"Human????"
7pm chimed - It spoke - "Welcome to abrakadrabble"
04 - Splendour - Madness
Was I mad? I suppose I was. A sane man would have given up quickly, would have rationed his supplies against a slim chance of rescue, or stepped out into the black to spare himself a terrible end starving out between the stars. Instead, I worked.
I striped down the hyperdrive to its base components, cleaned and inspected them, reassembled the drive, then went back to the cabin and try once again to jump. Two hundred and thirty seven times.
The definition of insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting a different result.
Insane? Perhaps. But alive.
05 - Futuristic Kung Fu - Excessive Results
"So what did he do next, Grandpa Frank?"
"Well, when he saw that bribery wasn't working, he invented a new plan. It was a clever plan, even if the results were rather unexpected. He decided to write so many Drabbles that people would be so confused that they would just HAVE to vote for him! He put in some bad puns, one of which he even stole from someone else, and he put other Drabblers names in his Drabble, all because he wanted to win so much!"
"What happened? Did it work?"
"That's a story for another time." He winked.
06 - Frank - Before you ask, yes I am proud of myself.
"No Janx!?"
The lab-coated scientists explained to the sullen miner "The drinks test was yesterday. Today's testing is for an arboreal planet. They think their condiments made from tree bark could become one of those commodities that attracts traders from throughout the galaxy."
Frank was led to the first of many plates on a trellis table. He took a forkful of food and winced, started choking, then coughed up the food. It was the same story with all the other plates until the last.
The scientists were shocked that they'd found an edible one, exclaiming "What? An unexpectorated tree salt?"
07 - MrMogadon - Ending with a Crowbar not a Wimple (Provisional Title)
“Sensationally, here at the 8th Mixed Martial Arts competition, the reigning champion, Ivan Tripyeredoff, has been beaten in the opening round.
Oozing confidence his smaller opponent, swathed in black robes, easily dodged his attacks.
So incensing the champion that, in an attempt to crush his nemesis, he ran himself into a post, knocking himself unconscious and exiting the competition.
Adding to the uproar, we’ve just heard, his opponent is from a warrior religious order, the Sisters of No Mercy.
A study of calm amidst the furore.
Confusion still reigns elsewhere but the victory was at least a nun expected result.”
08 - Edith_The_Hutt - Meet the new boss...
"I don't understand what went wrong!" cried the Senator as his clipper jinked and dodged planetary defence fire
"Perhaps a cultural misunderstanding Milord?" answered Butler, "they disagreed with being called Freshly Annexed Peasants"
"But that's factual!"
"The term 'Ballot-sucking inbred clowns'..."
"Other democracies hate their leaders!"
"I rather think they're considered martyrs sir"
"And their response to my economic policy, unbelievable!"
"Taxes so high half the population will be forced into slavery sir?"
"Exactly! That reaction was totally uncalled for!"
"Quite Milord. Shall I inform the Emperor one of her worlds has rebelled or will you make the call personally?"
09 - Alien - Unexpected Resulks
Alien was not happy. Everything was smashed against the wall.
Everyone wondered what had caused Alien's anger. Was it because Mr Mogadon had won? Or maybe Futuristic Kung Fu had not voted for Alien's drabble? Or maybe no-one had killed Simoof for a while.
In the Ayreshire Gentleman's Club, two brothers sat enjoying a glass of Jameson's.
"That was easy. I believe the agreement was our usual amount."
"It was."
A Scottish pound note changed hands.
"I've a new idea. Let's see who can get Mr Winnard to be out of whack first."
"Agreed. Shall we say, the usual amount?"
10 - moose666 - Help? From the helpdesk? surely you jest!
John braced himself, the Faulcon DeLacy customer service line was deserving of the title 'helldesk'
"Hi, I'm looking to replace the head on my anaconda.
The disposal tank has a crack... uhuh... yes... the warranty ran out 2 months ago, is that... ok.
So I just need to bring it to Reorte and you'll... Ah, magic, I'll take it round tomorrow.
Thanks alot!"
Eve raised an eyebrow - "You sure it was Faulcon DeLacy? they want 4 left testicles to fix things *in* warranty!"
"Positive."
"Well good thing too, it smells worse than a 24 hour non-stop sharting for charity event!"
11 - FelixBast - It's all in the name
Floating above the controls the kitten playfully batted at the bobblehead in the centre of the console.
Felix had purchased the kitten to keep him company. “Space Madness” was a real problem for long haulers. He had hoped the kitten would provide much needed company and help fend off the insanity.
What he hadn’t expected was that buying a rubber mouse for the kitten would, through a convoluted chain of events, end up with him locked out of his own ship floating in space. Felix looked at the kitten through the canopy and thought, “I think I’ll call you Trouble”.
12 - Listeri69 - Weird Science....
Death? Oh there are plenty of things worse than death, here at the Centaurai University for Neuro Technologies we've seen it all. This is where MODS was first discovered, as was Hangs syndrome and Trumbelitus. Of course sometimes the results we get are, shall we say 'unexpected' but that's what we do here at..
Oh you have the chart good..good Well if you follow me now this was one of our most unexpected results, as you can see from the large head this is the result of our shart and potato breeding program..
And thats how Simoof was born...
And how do you organize the honourable mentions?
