Good post, OP. Think that the act of you writing this post is in it self, a very good step.
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General / Off-Topic I'll Keep It Brief
- Thread starter Avago Earo
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Minonian
Banned
Meh- a forum, 'specially a game forum, is a great place to let off steam. Making up with the peeps you've upset is a nice touch, but don't go beating yourself up about how they/we feel. It's the internets, we expect to take a few pelters!
Sorry to disappoint you, but this is not where you blow off steam where you blow off steam is the facebook and political blogs...
This is a civilized place, with strict rules and happy to say, civilized community. The places i mentioned above? Deep water with sea trolls. Eatin you alive if you are not a rough SOB able to deal with em.
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Minonian
Banned
Well this kind of resolution is a 2 sided coin. i use it too deal with pain and emotional misery, these things in given time will pass. But job loss, material problems? This is not the right answer. you don't resolve the situation by forgeting about it. You just stabilizing it, and make the resolution impossible. Because if you forget em? You dont deal with them.
This kind of problems are need to dealt with it.
[video=youtube;-9hzO97Rj0Y]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9hzO97Rj0Y[/video]
Yes, but that can be a problem. The need to deal with these issues creates anxiety. And when anxiety is constant it degrades your emotional and physical wellbeing to the point where you can no longer deal with anything.
Hence what I called my "little island of tranquility" each day.
When looking for another job, or when worrying about my situation, or when having an outright panic attack about the future, or when trying to deal with the side-effects of SSRI depression medication, or researching suicide methods, I had that island to look forward to. I knew I could spend some of each day away from it, a small holiday from the spiral of doom and desperation I was decending on. Later on, that day, it'd all be ok for just a brief period.
Also, material problems shouldn't be forgotten about but they should also be put in proper context. Ok, one is jobless. What does that mean? It means that you should look for a job to find a source of income, but that's all. You're not "an unemployed", or a "jobseeker", or any other similar term. Nobody who finds themselves in this sort of situation should allow themselves to be defined by it. You're a human being with as much right to life and enjoyment as anyone else, just one who simply doesn't have work at the moment.
+Rep... been through the same thing myself. No doubt you'll get through it.
RE the pills. If they're not working for you, go for a run. It doesn't matter how fit you are. All that matters is the endorphin release. If all you can manage is 100m, as long as you're sweaty and tired, it will have you fixed up faster than anything.
Good words and sound advice. I do find that all the motivation, pep talks can make things worse; if those giving the advice, really don't have a clue. At the same time, a friendly face and a knowing smile can be like a break in the dark clouds, that seem to engulf us sometimes. Having a sense of self-worth is, I believe is the key to happiness in most things and if not happiness, then contentment at least. For some 6 years now, I have been classed as a burden to the state, a scrounger etc. I worked hard, paid my taxes and refused to sign-on for over 18 months; through stubbornness and self respect. I was a big man in the post I held, worked hard for over 10 years to achieve my position and earn the respect of colleges etc. Then nothing as the company went bust, with the help of the bankers. I thought; foolishly at the time, I would be ok, walk into another job with ease. Trouble is, as a young man, I spent some time in the big house and will always have to declare this and so now I find myself at the bottom of the heap. Often wondering; what is the point of being honest, of treating others with respect and trying to earn an honest crust. When all around, others are lying, cheating and stealing; in one form or another. At the same time, I remind myself, that when working, the amount I paid in taxes, will take another 15 years plus, to get back, at the rate they pay me today. A couple of years ago, I found myself on medication, sleeping away the days and constantly worrying about tomorrow, feeling dark and darker, seeing less and less hope. So I got myself off of the meds and just try to find ways to kill the time and focus my attention away from such things. My last project, was to build my own still; for making perfumes you understand. Scraping the parts together and trying skills that I never thought I would have, such as soldering etc. Gave me a small quest in life, a motivation to get up etc and the rewards, are interesting, to say the least. My latest project, is to heat my home, with just a wood burner and this is keeping the grey matter occupied for the moment. I don't see any real prospects for the future, but at the same time, day to day living and meeting the challenge head on, keeps me, sort of sane.
Minonian
Banned
There is the things you can't help it at all. The best you can do to leave them where is.
There is the things where time and peace is the best healer.
There is the things where you must take action.
There is the things where you can partially help, but you can't possibly resolve everything.
Know the difference.
And yes, there is your mental and pyhsical burden bearing capacity. It can be increased, but even this have it's ultimate limits. We are not "gods" after all!
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Very true
My greatest respect --- I think for my part that the state, the employers and the salaried employees (especially those who are working overtime) should be considered as profiteers and parasites. All are guilty of refusing to share the work and the wealth (It is so easy to stigmatize the "unemployed" that this can also be done in the other direction
)
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Avago Earo
Banned
This has been a biggie for me. Your words ring true. Thank You.
Good to know that you are now on the road to recovery.
I think this is an excellent attitude. Anxiety can be a sod, and if you're in a pickle like unemployment you can easily end up not doing much but feeling like you aught to be doing something all the time, leading to constant anxiety ultimately depression. When it happened to me I found the best thing to do was to compartmentalize my time into little sections. 1 hour of job hunting, 1 hour of chores, 1 hour of activities with the little one, lunch and then treat my self to some guilt free play time (which I felt I'd earned). By committing to a little routine, with rewards built in, you can feel much better about your situation and give yourself much more stamina. It wasn't too long before I got another job and fortunately I still had a nice positive attitude when I started work again.
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A change of scenery, a bit of fresh air, slowing things down to be able to ponder over things, are often the best remedy for depression. Online may be where many vent, but it may not be the place for getting anything constructive out of it. I'm glad you met others facing similar issues, and I hope you feel better (and find work!) soon.
Best of luck!
S
Best of luck!
SIt takes a brave person to admit they have a problem. It takes a braver one to admit they have a problem to others, especially strangers (even if they have similar interests). Repped, and I hope that everything starts looking up for you.
Fly safely, see you out amongst the stars, and have fun, whatever you do.
Fly safely, see you out amongst the stars, and have fun, whatever you do.
Avago Earo
Banned
A change of scenery, a bit of fresh air, slowing things down to be able to ponder over things, are often the best remedy for depression. Online may be where many vent, but it may not be the place for getting anything constructive out of it. I'm glad you met others facing similar issues, and I hope you feel better (and find work!) soon.
Best of luck!
Very true. I'm looking after a friend's dog. More or less a little rug on legs with attitude. I breathed and Gizmo chased a stick. I felt happy but there's always that 'scrounger' finger pointing down from on high just to put you in your place. I tried making an Elite video with my music on. I know music is down to taste so I chose a tune that had no Anarcho Punk words so it would be more accesible and maybe more inclusive. It (music) cuts out but some people may like it.
[video=youtube;7_azCwTzZCw]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_azCwTzZCw[/video]
Avago Earo
Banned
[video=youtube;aObZJN9zDtA]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aObZJN9zDtA[/video]
Sorry to disappoint you, but this is not where you blow off steam where you blow off steam is the facebook and political blogs...
The places i mentioned above? Deep water with sea trolls. Eatin you alive if you are not a rough SOB able to deal with em.
So true! OP, stick with us, you're amongst friends!
Are you in the UK? Government service has joined the campaign to de-stigmatise spent convictions, even HMRC won't ask you for details on your application. Hopefully industry will follow their lead- rehabilitation is a core aim of the Prison Service: i.e. "We keep those sentenced to prison in custody, helping them lead law-abiding and useful lives, both while they are in prison and after they are released. " If you want to try for a job where your talent and experience can be used to serve our country, your past indiscretions aren't the barrier they may once have been. Failing that, it's great to hear you're not just knuckling under, but actually taking positive action to improve your life. Keep at it mate, better times will come around again.