Thanks for the votes to Galactic Midden last week. His choice for this week was Betrayal. I wonder how many voters told Simoof they'd vote for him and then changed their allegiance at the last moment.
Psykokow hosts the Abraka-Drabble live reading show and comedy hour at 7pm GMT, Fridays on...
HUTTON ORBITAL RADIO! http://streaming.radionomy.com/HuttonOrbitalRadio (audio only)
LAVE RADIO! http://laveradio.com/ (audio only)
TWITCH! http://www.twitch.tv/psykokow/ (audio & visual)
and will also be uploaded to his You-tube channel & anywhere else he can inflict the world with our drabblings!
Make sure you come back on Sunday night to see how well your Drabble has done. At least come back before Monday 15:00 to check if you're the one that has to provide us with a topic.
Please vote. And a warning to all of the contestants, don't vote for yourselves.
Anyone caught voting for themselves shall find themselves in a race.. to the death.
01 - Frank - Leap Tall Buildings in a Single Bound
Astrohurdles is new to this decade's Olympics. Some people might not be aware of the sport.
It's been around almost as long as space travel. Miners would find a suitable asteroid field. It had to be densely packed with very small asteroids. And then they'd jump from asteroid to asteroid to be the first one to pick up the flag at the end of the course.
New equipment has done a lot to make this sport safer. Not only are their spacesuits designed to take high impacts, but thrusters are built-in which automatically activate if collision speeds are too high.
02 - RoyalHankey - Title the longest ever snail race
It was time for the snail race
A snail is a slow creature that lives on planet earth
They were often used in races to entertain humans and visiting aliens
It was a hard race but the truth of it is, they only had to go 10cm to win
Race is on
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Snail two was the winner.
03 - moose666 - With apologies to Dermot Morgan
Psykokow sat in his buggeh, precisely parked at the entrance to Napier Installation. Sixty clicks ahead was Sommerfield.
Before he could disengage the handbrake, a shart brown sidewinder floated down infront of him.
"So kow" said Simoof "I heard you're a racist now."
"Exqueeze me?"
"Well, you're taking part in this one, and you did the station one a while back"
"RaceER!"
"Same difference"
Kow sighed - "Make yourself useful and scout the path for stray skimmers."
The sidewinder turned, revealing a farting pig decal on the underside, and rocketed ahead.
Kow released the handbrake and likewise shot forward at speed.
04 - Futuristic Kung Fu - The race to plagiarism
They raced to the tip of the summit, SRVs bouncing and jetting along. Commander Erik Marcaigh was filming the race from above, nestled cozily in his Cobra Mk III.
Psykokow's SRV plowed into the side of Simoof's, sending him off the side of the cliff for yet another death. Seconds later, Futuristic Kung Fu bumped Kow's SRV just enough that he fell to the same doom.
The three remaining SRVs, guided by FKF's superior skills, formed a tower. FKF sent Galactic Midden flying in to the air, causing Erik Marcaigh to crash from the confusion. Descending shrapnel regrettably destroyed MrMogadon.
05 - phong - The race to space.
Kim jumps into the pilot seat of his new Gecko,pupils widening with excitement as his eyes caress the control panel in front of him.Gesturing for silence,he closes them and as his hands grasp the steering yoke,imagines himself in control of the most powerful wing on the planet.After some time a nervous uncle coughs and his reverie is broken.Leaning back and swivelling to face the assorted group of government officials and generals, he wishes he had brought his cat and almost giggles.
He whistles tonelessly.The leader is bored and wants a new lieder board.
06 - Simoof - The End. (no, not in a rude way)
You don't need to be fast.
You don't even need to be moving.
What you do need is perfect timing.
Too soon, and your rivals will have time to recover.
Too late and you might not survive the trials and tribulations.
Timing is where it is won or lost.
His ships console flickered again.
His time was running out.
Had he left it too late?
He sold the goddam artifact and made his way towards the letterbox.
The station lights flickered briefly. He could hardly contain his victorious smile.
As he adjusted his trajectory his ship flickered one final time.
07 - Galactic Midden - Going Down
Amongst panicked screams the communications officer yelled “TORPEDO!” as the portside engine was severed from its fuel supply. The battlecruiser’s safety harnesses fought to keep the crew in control as it listed towards Merope-5’s surface. “Where did they come from commander?” asked Captain Simiiff.
“Outer Yeras” replied the intelligence officer, “we thought Yeras was hiding pirates but it looks like a military convoy went through there”.
Ensign Enis piped up “Captain, I’ve got tubes o and p online”
Simiif strained against the restraints, “ready p Enis, let's see if they like some p”.
And they called this an arms race.
08 - Listeri69 - Ready Meal For One...
'I'd like to complain about this popty-ping' psykokow motioned at his small piece of equipment that he'd got out on the desk.
'Well what appears to be the matter with it?' Willie B Hardagan examined Pykokows equipment....
'Well everytime I go to put something in it, the door won't open and it turns itself off'
'And where did you get this Popty-ping from?'
'Well my brother picked it up from a used popty-ping seller on Slough, It was fine until we put in the haggis ready meal'
'Ahh there's your problem you put the wrong race of food in it'
09 - FelixBast - Run to the stars
On planet Earth, in the early part of the twenty first century, the second space race began in earnest.
Earth’s historical records report that an American President helped motivate the Earth’s nations to fund spaceship programs that would allow humanity to populate other planets.
Historical records, from outside the Sol system, report that whole nations were motivated to leave the Earth because the American President had just been elected and everyone knew the planet was doomed.
A ship was named after this President, and if you go to the Vesper-M4 system you can find a garbage hauler called “The Trump”.
10 - Alien - It Wasn't Me
"I'm not a racer."
"But all the evidence I have here says you are."
"I've never raced anyone in my life."
"But I have statements from several witnesses that all say you did."
"But it wasn't me, I was finishing off a bottle of Janx."
"So you were drinking at the time? That's a very serious crime."
"But I wasn't racing anyone. I am not guilty I tell you."
"But it was on all the Federation channels, even the Imperials mentioned you. You won several trophies while racing."
"What? Oh, wait, I think Simoof swacced two letters on my keyboard."
11 - insanephoton - Race for life
Teagan swore. It was supposed to be a simple job, just kill some skimmers, easy as that. No one had said anything about the base defences. The Scarab's shields quickly failed. If only she could get back to her ship behind the ridge she might be ok
The missile hit just as she crested the ridge.. The Scarab was immobilised, it's wheels splayed at awkward angles. Teagan raced to the ship on foot with only seconds of air left. The gauge read empty just as she sealed the airlock door. She had made it, now someone was going to pay.
Psykokow hosts the Abraka-Drabble live reading show and comedy hour at 7pm GMT, Fridays on...
HUTTON ORBITAL RADIO! http://streaming.radionomy.com/HuttonOrbitalRadio (audio only)
LAVE RADIO! http://laveradio.com/ (audio only)
TWITCH! http://www.twitch.tv/psykokow/ (audio & visual)
and will also be uploaded to his You-tube channel & anywhere else he can inflict the world with our drabblings!
Make sure you come back on Sunday night to see how well your Drabble has done. At least come back before Monday 15:00 to check if you're the one that has to provide us with a topic.
Please vote. And a warning to all of the contestants, don't vote for yourselves.
Anyone caught voting for themselves shall find themselves in a race.. to the death.
01 - Frank - Leap Tall Buildings in a Single Bound
Astrohurdles is new to this decade's Olympics. Some people might not be aware of the sport.
It's been around almost as long as space travel. Miners would find a suitable asteroid field. It had to be densely packed with very small asteroids. And then they'd jump from asteroid to asteroid to be the first one to pick up the flag at the end of the course.
New equipment has done a lot to make this sport safer. Not only are their spacesuits designed to take high impacts, but thrusters are built-in which automatically activate if collision speeds are too high.
02 - RoyalHankey - Title the longest ever snail race
It was time for the snail race
A snail is a slow creature that lives on planet earth
They were often used in races to entertain humans and visiting aliens
It was a hard race but the truth of it is, they only had to go 10cm to win
Race is on
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Sweating sweating sweating sweating move a couple of centimetres and stop
Snail two was the winner.
03 - moose666 - With apologies to Dermot Morgan
Psykokow sat in his buggeh, precisely parked at the entrance to Napier Installation. Sixty clicks ahead was Sommerfield.
Before he could disengage the handbrake, a shart brown sidewinder floated down infront of him.
"So kow" said Simoof "I heard you're a racist now."
"Exqueeze me?"
"Well, you're taking part in this one, and you did the station one a while back"
"RaceER!"
"Same difference"
Kow sighed - "Make yourself useful and scout the path for stray skimmers."
The sidewinder turned, revealing a farting pig decal on the underside, and rocketed ahead.
Kow released the handbrake and likewise shot forward at speed.
04 - Futuristic Kung Fu - The race to plagiarism
They raced to the tip of the summit, SRVs bouncing and jetting along. Commander Erik Marcaigh was filming the race from above, nestled cozily in his Cobra Mk III.
Psykokow's SRV plowed into the side of Simoof's, sending him off the side of the cliff for yet another death. Seconds later, Futuristic Kung Fu bumped Kow's SRV just enough that he fell to the same doom.
The three remaining SRVs, guided by FKF's superior skills, formed a tower. FKF sent Galactic Midden flying in to the air, causing Erik Marcaigh to crash from the confusion. Descending shrapnel regrettably destroyed MrMogadon.
05 - phong - The race to space.
Kim jumps into the pilot seat of his new Gecko,pupils widening with excitement as his eyes caress the control panel in front of him.Gesturing for silence,he closes them and as his hands grasp the steering yoke,imagines himself in control of the most powerful wing on the planet.After some time a nervous uncle coughs and his reverie is broken.Leaning back and swivelling to face the assorted group of government officials and generals, he wishes he had brought his cat and almost giggles.
He whistles tonelessly.The leader is bored and wants a new lieder board.
06 - Simoof - The End. (no, not in a rude way)
You don't need to be fast.
You don't even need to be moving.
What you do need is perfect timing.
Too soon, and your rivals will have time to recover.
Too late and you might not survive the trials and tribulations.
Timing is where it is won or lost.
His ships console flickered again.
His time was running out.
Had he left it too late?
He sold the goddam artifact and made his way towards the letterbox.
The station lights flickered briefly. He could hardly contain his victorious smile.
As he adjusted his trajectory his ship flickered one final time.
07 - Galactic Midden - Going Down
Amongst panicked screams the communications officer yelled “TORPEDO!” as the portside engine was severed from its fuel supply. The battlecruiser’s safety harnesses fought to keep the crew in control as it listed towards Merope-5’s surface. “Where did they come from commander?” asked Captain Simiiff.
“Outer Yeras” replied the intelligence officer, “we thought Yeras was hiding pirates but it looks like a military convoy went through there”.
Ensign Enis piped up “Captain, I’ve got tubes o and p online”
Simiif strained against the restraints, “ready p Enis, let's see if they like some p”.
And they called this an arms race.
08 - Listeri69 - Ready Meal For One...
'I'd like to complain about this popty-ping' psykokow motioned at his small piece of equipment that he'd got out on the desk.
'Well what appears to be the matter with it?' Willie B Hardagan examined Pykokows equipment....
'Well everytime I go to put something in it, the door won't open and it turns itself off'
'And where did you get this Popty-ping from?'
'Well my brother picked it up from a used popty-ping seller on Slough, It was fine until we put in the haggis ready meal'
'Ahh there's your problem you put the wrong race of food in it'
09 - FelixBast - Run to the stars
On planet Earth, in the early part of the twenty first century, the second space race began in earnest.
Earth’s historical records report that an American President helped motivate the Earth’s nations to fund spaceship programs that would allow humanity to populate other planets.
Historical records, from outside the Sol system, report that whole nations were motivated to leave the Earth because the American President had just been elected and everyone knew the planet was doomed.
A ship was named after this President, and if you go to the Vesper-M4 system you can find a garbage hauler called “The Trump”.
10 - Alien - It Wasn't Me
"I'm not a racer."
"But all the evidence I have here says you are."
"I've never raced anyone in my life."
"But I have statements from several witnesses that all say you did."
"But it wasn't me, I was finishing off a bottle of Janx."
"So you were drinking at the time? That's a very serious crime."
"But I wasn't racing anyone. I am not guilty I tell you."
"But it was on all the Federation channels, even the Imperials mentioned you. You won several trophies while racing."
"What? Oh, wait, I think Simoof swacced two letters on my keyboard."
11 - insanephoton - Race for life
Teagan swore. It was supposed to be a simple job, just kill some skimmers, easy as that. No one had said anything about the base defences. The Scarab's shields quickly failed. If only she could get back to her ship behind the ridge she might be ok
The missile hit just as she crested the ridge.. The Scarab was immobilised, it's wheels splayed at awkward angles. Teagan raced to the ship on foot with only seconds of air left. The gauge read empty just as she sealed the airlock door. She had made it, now someone was going to pay.
