Open Letter to the Thargoids
- Thread starter Bran Tse Mallory
- Start date
Anyone thought about changing to a female avatar? and pink liveries?
Maybe they leave you alone when they realize they are shooting fellow females
My avatar is already female. It's the cover art from the card game of the same name. Which happens to be the designer's daughter.
Hello Thargoids,
Can I mention that, at first, when I met your species, YOU kept pulling me out of Witch Space and attacking me. OK, that was somewhat upsetting, but I survived it and moved on. Later, when you were stranded after being infected with an engineered virus, I was able to get you the antidote (which does show that I do not bear a grudge). By way of thanks you gave me a lovely little Scout Ship, which had what appeared to be a tame Black Hole for a cargo hold (and I would LOVE to know how you managed that!). Immense jump range, agile, heavily armed, and (despite having an apparent weight of 186 tonnes) capable of holding thousands of tonnes of cargo and equipment (I normally had 8,400T of military hyper fuel, as well as a lot of equipment). I kept that ship, as she was a beautiful work of art, science, and engineering.
Recently I have been looking around for you and your ships. I have been to a crash site, and I did look for any signs of life (I though I had found some, but I was wrong). I did keep it company during a couple of nights, just in case something happened (nothing did, I am sorry to say). I did try to give it some 'Waters of Shinrarta', as they are (for our species, at least) a powerful healing agent, but it did not accept them. I also moved the artefacts away from the crash site to see if their emissions were masking any from the wreckage. I will admit to destroying a few of your artefacts, but I was looking to get an upgrade done on a couple of my ships, and the Engineer who could do this did want some fragments of your technology. I hope that you understand it was not personal. I have also been to one of the 'Barnacle' sites, but I did not take anything from them. I have purchased some Meta Alloys (again, for an Engineer). I have also been to the site where conflict occurred, but I understand our species well enough to know it could have been US that initiated the attack.
Fly safely, and I hope to meet you peacefully out amongst the stars.
Razor.
Can I mention that, at first, when I met your species, YOU kept pulling me out of Witch Space and attacking me. OK, that was somewhat upsetting, but I survived it and moved on. Later, when you were stranded after being infected with an engineered virus, I was able to get you the antidote (which does show that I do not bear a grudge). By way of thanks you gave me a lovely little Scout Ship, which had what appeared to be a tame Black Hole for a cargo hold (and I would LOVE to know how you managed that!). Immense jump range, agile, heavily armed, and (despite having an apparent weight of 186 tonnes) capable of holding thousands of tonnes of cargo and equipment (I normally had 8,400T of military hyper fuel, as well as a lot of equipment). I kept that ship, as she was a beautiful work of art, science, and engineering.
Recently I have been looking around for you and your ships. I have been to a crash site, and I did look for any signs of life (I though I had found some, but I was wrong). I did keep it company during a couple of nights, just in case something happened (nothing did, I am sorry to say). I did try to give it some 'Waters of Shinrarta', as they are (for our species, at least) a powerful healing agent, but it did not accept them. I also moved the artefacts away from the crash site to see if their emissions were masking any from the wreckage. I will admit to destroying a few of your artefacts, but I was looking to get an upgrade done on a couple of my ships, and the Engineer who could do this did want some fragments of your technology. I hope that you understand it was not personal. I have also been to one of the 'Barnacle' sites, but I did not take anything from them. I have purchased some Meta Alloys (again, for an Engineer). I have also been to the site where conflict occurred, but I understand our species well enough to know it could have been US that initiated the attack.
Fly safely, and I hope to meet you peacefully out amongst the stars.
Razor.
Last edited:
Oh yes, I forgot to put it in the inferior future cuesative tense - Doh!
Happy Birthday, Bran. Have some Centauri Mega Gin, Eranin Pearl Whisky, Gerasian Gueuze Beer and Lavian Brandy to celebrate. Tomorrow take some Waters of Shinrarta to recover, and some Tanmark Tranqil Tea to settle down with. I did order a Jaques Queintian Still, but the delivery charges are very high, with a 2 decade lead time! I also don't have time to get you a Hutton Mug.
Last edited:
Thargoids ... Tharjoids ... T.j ... it's all starting to make a creepy kind of sense!!
Dear Thargoids,
Let's talk business. There will surely be some hotheads wanting to shoot you, but pay no attention. Concentrate on this:
We've developed some very interesting chemicals that might do wonders to your physique: Onion Head, Centauri Mega Gin, Orrerian Vicious Brew, Tarach Spice,Toxandji Virocide, to name just a few. In addition, our best laboratories produce a thing called Performance Enhancer that can make you extremely popular with the female part of your population.
I am willing to arrange a trade deal: name the merchandise, quantity and place, and I can provide up to 720 tones in one go. In return, let's talk about that green corrosive weapons of yours, and that disabling thingy you use.
I'm open to negotiations.
all the best
Let's talk business. There will surely be some hotheads wanting to shoot you, but pay no attention. Concentrate on this:
We've developed some very interesting chemicals that might do wonders to your physique: Onion Head, Centauri Mega Gin, Orrerian Vicious Brew, Tarach Spice,Toxandji Virocide, to name just a few. In addition, our best laboratories produce a thing called Performance Enhancer that can make you extremely popular with the female part of your population.
I am willing to arrange a trade deal: name the merchandise, quantity and place, and I can provide up to 720 tones in one go. In return, let's talk about that green corrosive weapons of yours, and that disabling thingy you use.
I'm open to negotiations.
all the best
As a rule, they don't - I suspect the card you got was one of T.J's pranks. Thargoids are an insect race, and so have 100s or 1000s of kids. That would be enough to make you cranky at the best of times, but when it's your birthday and 1000 cards arrive!! Where do you display them? And when little Billy Thargoid Jr comes round and finds that you've forgotten to display his card!? Who needs that kind of grief!?
And finally, the complete loss of trees on Thargon Prime due to the ravages of the greetings card industry! No wonder they're heading our way ... they're after our cardboard and paper!!
Last edited:
Small point
Will they be willing to join the Economic and Custom union. Also are they going to agree to free movement.
Will they be willing to join the Economic and Custom union. Also are they going to agree to free movement.
Last edited:
I'd love Thargoid moderators here........ imagine what they'd do to the endless whiners...................
Bill
I for one, welcome our new insectoid overlords
Bill
I for one, welcome our new insectoid overlords
I think we need a poll about whether we agree with this approach or not. If we can't have a poll for that, please can we have a poll to determine what alcoholic beverages Bran has to drink tonight?
Last edited:
Happy 50th Bran! I walked through that door myself three weeks ago.
That just won't do.Edit: Ziggy the last time I went to a club was to see Paul Oakenfold at Cream, Liverpool... I was a fair bit younger but I can still 'bust a move' when required so where are we going?
Meet me at The Little Devil in Tilburg (the Netherlands). There's a band playing called Farstreet who have an excellent guitarist. Drinks are on me.
See you at 21:00. [big grin]
edit: In all the hilarity I forgot: Happy Birthday Oldtimer!!
Last edited:
Happy birthday Bran!
I'm being dragged kicking and screaming through it next year.
Oh yes... Happy Birthday!
[up]
[up]