This is probably a network issue with NAT.
Elite as many games today relies on P2P networking, in this case, it means that you have direct contact with everyone in the same instance, and so does all the players... so that is how it is supposed to work.
Now, lets introduce stuff that throws a wrench in the gears to get this working...
First of all, you most likely have a home network router, either you bought yourself, or your ISP gave you one. And here there is usually a strngely named settings called UPnP, enable that... that will let games like Elite, poke a hole in your firewall,and yet, so can anything else on your network... UPnP was not built for security, it was built to make things easier for the normal person with limited tech skills. The more advanced course is to do port forwarding... If you have a friend that told you disable UPnP, then get them to help you port forward.
But the easiest way to go about, enable UPnP and see if things improve, then you can decide if you go the easy route (keep UPnP), or get that friend to help you with port forwarding...
So if everyone is having UPnP/Port forwarding enabled, there can still be things to mess things up. And here is when you ISP can royally screw you or your friends over... this is more likely for users in Asia... That is because we are mostly using IPv4, but there is a new version, IPv6, that is slowly being adopted.... Now the issue here, is that western countries have allocated lots of the IPv4 addresses and as time progressed and more and more of the world wanted to get on the internet, the fewer IPv4 addresses there was to give out. So ISPs needed to get creative with how they use their available pool of IPv4 addresses. And one of these things is that ISP can do NAT in a whole bigger level, that usually put a big wrench in the cogs for P2P networking, and if two are having this issues, then all their traffic has to be relayed between the other players... So the most common way to actually fix this sort of things is use one of those VPN's services, that many people use for accessing streaming services in another country etc, like US Netflix. As it is unlikely that your ISP will do anything for you if they are they cause of this. Some ISPs will, often for an extra fee, will put you outside their Carrier grade NAT... For most users that only watches Netflix/Youtube/Hulu/<name you streaming service>, surf the web, etc this works fine.... it only messes with P2P traffic...
So there is no simple answer to what is wrong or what is causing this, but my experience with this kind of problem, it is network related and it involves 1 or more of the players in the same instance. And to make matters worse, players can deliberately cause these kind of issues.
I have tried to keep is as non technical as possible
Glosary
- P2P = Per to Per network, my computer talking to your computer, that is a P2P connection, when you visit this forum, this not P2P, that is server connection.
- NAT = Network Address Translation, a way to hide many computers behind 1 or more IP addresses
- Port forwarding = Only used with NAT, you have 5 computers (includes phones, tablets, etc) on your home network, you decide to play Elite, so another player wants to send you some packets, thye arrive at the router, and theroute goes, who should have this packet? looks in port forwardnig settings and UPnP for a match, if no match found, I have noone to deliver this too... and simply drops the packet...So Portforwarding will tell the router, packets to port 5000 is for my my computer playing Elite, and UPnP does this configuration automatically.