I've never understood how one can mix the private life and the professional life. Certainly the passion of his work or the fear of managers ...
General / Off-Topic Do you suffer from depression?
- Thread starter glynie
- Start date
I've never understood how one can mix the private life and the professional life. Certainly the passion of his work or the fear of managers ...
Agreed. So many modern work and managerial practices are essentially abusive to people.
They may make a profit, but at what cost?
Back in the early 90s I worked for a time, with a couple who were very dynamic. They had the energy and motivation to keep going and were contemptuous of those that didn't.
But much like the Zero Hours contract which is discussed in another thread, it's difficult to imagine what can be done about it. Being paid an adequate wage would be a start, but not nearly enough. I worked for a time in S Netherlands in the late 70s. There they worked for an hour then took 5 mins off. It sounded fine, but stuffing food down your throat in less than 5 mins (given that you had to walk to and from the canteen) was not exactly relaxing.
Yeah, work related stress has been linked to a number of ailments (including depression).
https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/work-related-stress
I wonder what the collective socialised cost of those privatised profits is:
http://www.medibank.com.au/client/documents/pdfs/the-cost-of-workplace-stress.pdf
The sources I've linked here are to Australian statistics only and the first one is a little dated, but they're quite interesting.
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I remember a few months ago of the death of student. The banking lobby had explained that the long hours are necessary to respond the needs of customers. Demanding, very fussy about the quality of service, they are calling for availability round the clock, seven days a week and impose short delivery times. ----- http://www.independent.co.uk/news/u...merrill-lynch-sparks-furore-over-8775917.html ---- Apparently these people who live in the opulence and the pockets full of money, do not know what it is that the work sharing.
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Which is why i needed to get it out of my head last night and watch some comedy lol. But in all seriousness, i'm glad i was honest and it seems plenty of other people understand these issues. I have nothing against those who tell me to take control, i try.This thread makes depressing reading
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For me it's been on/off for several years. My family and rl friends have no clue. I've been able to hide it so well no one knows a thing, I've been getting better these past few months thanks to the group of guys I fly with. I don't feel judged nor do I feel that I have to put on a facade there. My anxiety levels are still pretty high, I can go to a few safe places or where I know there is someone waiting for me, other than that I need someone to come with me; Im not sure how I'll cope when I move out in a few months time :S
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Good luck. Hang in there.
Depression?
Aint nobody got time fo dat...
Aint nobody got time fo dat...
I am self-employed and run a small business for last 15 years. So one would think I had time to get used to the seesaw nature of things.
But no. I do alternately hate myself and the rest of the world, which isn't really helpful.
Worries are like a rocking chair. You seem to move, but don't really get anywhere. But hey, it gives you something to do.
But no. I do alternately hate myself and the rest of the world, which isn't really helpful.
Worries are like a rocking chair. You seem to move, but don't really get anywhere. But hey, it gives you something to do.
verminstar
Banned
Ok, not gonna go back too far in time here and not gonna expand too much on specific details. The last decade or so has enough bad mojo to explain a few things...going back further goes into a time of living in northern ireland when I was a very different person than I am now. Earliest childhood memory was watching shell shocked soldiers picking random body parts off the street after an IRA car bomb went off prematurely. Things got fairly nasty after that as the first estate I lived in was flanked on 3 sides by some of the biggest republican strongholds in the county...fighting against much larger numbers was pretty much an everyday affair while bruises, scars and assault charges are seen as marks of respect. Complicated history which is another story for another place perhaps.
So...last decade only...buckle up, its a bumpy ride and this ain't kansas.
Got married to me last wife in '99 but things not good...I was a bit of a bad boy trying to walk away from a life that didn't want to let me go. The usual stuff that northern ireland is famous for, which ended with my best friend being killed in front of me but here's the best bit...it was "my own side" that carried it out. Single bullet to back of the head which was the killing shot...2 in the face so the family couldn't have an open casket...pure hatred and spite.
Anyway yeah...northern ireland...the "troubles" as they called them. Been there done that and still walked away, but moving on...
Ok so yeah, me and the missus not good so we decide to have a kid but herein lies a problem. My wife had a brain tumor removed when she was 22, bout the same size as a golf ball which affected her "pituity" hormone glands...not sure of the spelling so bear with me here. Anyway, she couldn't ovulate naturally and we needed some help. Adoption was out of the question because of my history with drugs and, other "troubles" but apart from that, I was firing on all 4 cylinders in the kiddy making department.
So...IVF failed but then the chance of a new miracle drug arrived which was literally only out of trials in israel, but we had to sign a waver because there was a risk because of her medical history. This wasn't really explained and my wife was so desperate to have a child that she ignored what was a small risk...supposedly. Still very low chance of success...hence why everyone was shocked at how quickly it worked and we were gonna have a baby girl. First moment I held her, affected me on a very deep level that changed my entire outlook on life and for a few years, they all lived happily ever after.
But this story doesn't have a happy ending I'm afraid...not like in the movies. Disaster strikes in 3s they say...first my daughter is diagnosed with autism and withing 6 months, my wife is diagnosed with cancer...then I lost my job because I fell asleep in work because I had to change my wife's nappys at 3 in the morning while looking after a difficult child prone to autistic meltdowns. Lots of fun.
Anyway yeah, lots of unhappy memories and my wife died 7 years ago. Friends try to encourage me sometimes when they say many guys would have just walked away with barely a look back but I didn't...I brought my daughter up the best I could under the circumstances and even managed to build up a small business which I worked part time. Nothing fancy, just a small window cleaning run. Became quite active in the local autistic community and worked closely with the schools who found it difficult to deal with...she has fairly acute aspergers syndrome, as do I although mine is much higher up the scale than hers and I don't have many of the drawbacks she has. Sorta like blade of the autistic world although I didn't even know I had it in me until after my daughter was diagnosed and my wife became obsessed with finding out which one of us was responsible.
Anyway...I'm rambling a bit now.
So...getting on ok, am comfortable but not extravagant and certainly not well off but we were doin ok. I own my own home and everything in it...no HP and no debts that couldn't be managed when all of a sudden, I get this really weird feeling in both legs at work...sorta like sciatica but the thing with sciatica is that it never goes above the waist...ever. Within a week, mine was from my little pink toes to the thinning patch on top of my head, and within a month, I was in a wheelchair and discussing my options were with my doc who had confirmed I had RRMS...relapsing remitting multiple sclerosis...got the spelling right that time I see.
So anyway...that was about 2 years ago and brings us almost upto current events. Fairly sure there's enough there to explain depression with? If not, I can expand even further with yet more tales of woe. I am walking now again, although my mountain biking days are gone, along with work because my jobs always depended on physical fitness and balance, both of which are disastrous symptoms of my "condition" hence I am now unemployable in the job I loved for 20 years. How i'm mobile again is a matter of some controversy and involves a certain weed which is refined into certain oils...use yer imagination cos I can't be bolloxed with another ban. Basically, I refused to give in...of all the fights I have been in in my life, this one is by far the hardest and most bitter. I live with pain every single day of my life and my memories of the past mean I don't sleep so good at times. Can't really trust anyone to talk to about that so it gets kept locked deep down in a dark place inside...sorry bout that.
I'm 44 years old and at 42 my life literally stopped cold...my only comfort is knowing my daughter has an IQ of 150+ and will go further than I could have ever dreamed of going. She will be the first in my family to get a degree and the first in my family not to have a record before she's an adult...and that right there means I have a reason to keep going...to ensure she has that.
Depression? It's really not funny business...verm out ^^
So...last decade only...buckle up, its a bumpy ride and this ain't kansas.
Got married to me last wife in '99 but things not good...I was a bit of a bad boy trying to walk away from a life that didn't want to let me go. The usual stuff that northern ireland is famous for, which ended with my best friend being killed in front of me but here's the best bit...it was "my own side" that carried it out. Single bullet to back of the head which was the killing shot...2 in the face so the family couldn't have an open casket...pure hatred and spite.
Anyway yeah...northern ireland...the "troubles" as they called them. Been there done that and still walked away, but moving on...
Ok so yeah, me and the missus not good so we decide to have a kid but herein lies a problem. My wife had a brain tumor removed when she was 22, bout the same size as a golf ball which affected her "pituity" hormone glands...not sure of the spelling so bear with me here. Anyway, she couldn't ovulate naturally and we needed some help. Adoption was out of the question because of my history with drugs and, other "troubles" but apart from that, I was firing on all 4 cylinders in the kiddy making department.
So...IVF failed but then the chance of a new miracle drug arrived which was literally only out of trials in israel, but we had to sign a waver because there was a risk because of her medical history. This wasn't really explained and my wife was so desperate to have a child that she ignored what was a small risk...supposedly. Still very low chance of success...hence why everyone was shocked at how quickly it worked and we were gonna have a baby girl. First moment I held her, affected me on a very deep level that changed my entire outlook on life and for a few years, they all lived happily ever after.
But this story doesn't have a happy ending I'm afraid...not like in the movies. Disaster strikes in 3s they say...first my daughter is diagnosed with autism and withing 6 months, my wife is diagnosed with cancer...then I lost my job because I fell asleep in work because I had to change my wife's nappys at 3 in the morning while looking after a difficult child prone to autistic meltdowns. Lots of fun.
Anyway yeah, lots of unhappy memories and my wife died 7 years ago. Friends try to encourage me sometimes when they say many guys would have just walked away with barely a look back but I didn't...I brought my daughter up the best I could under the circumstances and even managed to build up a small business which I worked part time. Nothing fancy, just a small window cleaning run. Became quite active in the local autistic community and worked closely with the schools who found it difficult to deal with...she has fairly acute aspergers syndrome, as do I although mine is much higher up the scale than hers and I don't have many of the drawbacks she has. Sorta like blade of the autistic world although I didn't even know I had it in me until after my daughter was diagnosed and my wife became obsessed with finding out which one of us was responsible.
Anyway...I'm rambling a bit now.
So...getting on ok, am comfortable but not extravagant and certainly not well off but we were doin ok. I own my own home and everything in it...no HP and no debts that couldn't be managed when all of a sudden, I get this really weird feeling in both legs at work...sorta like sciatica but the thing with sciatica is that it never goes above the waist...ever. Within a week, mine was from my little pink toes to the thinning patch on top of my head, and within a month, I was in a wheelchair and discussing my options were with my doc who had confirmed I had RRMS...relapsing remitting multiple sclerosis...got the spelling right that time I see.
So anyway...that was about 2 years ago and brings us almost upto current events. Fairly sure there's enough there to explain depression with? If not, I can expand even further with yet more tales of woe. I am walking now again, although my mountain biking days are gone, along with work because my jobs always depended on physical fitness and balance, both of which are disastrous symptoms of my "condition" hence I am now unemployable in the job I loved for 20 years. How i'm mobile again is a matter of some controversy and involves a certain weed which is refined into certain oils...use yer imagination cos I can't be bolloxed with another ban. Basically, I refused to give in...of all the fights I have been in in my life, this one is by far the hardest and most bitter. I live with pain every single day of my life and my memories of the past mean I don't sleep so good at times. Can't really trust anyone to talk to about that so it gets kept locked deep down in a dark place inside...sorry bout that.
I'm 44 years old and at 42 my life literally stopped cold...my only comfort is knowing my daughter has an IQ of 150+ and will go further than I could have ever dreamed of going. She will be the first in my family to get a degree and the first in my family not to have a record before she's an adult...and that right there means I have a reason to keep going...to ensure she has that.
Depression? It's really not funny business...verm out ^^
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Javert
Volunteer Moderator
It's good to see that members here are able to share their experiences without being judged. Good luck to all those who are suffering now from some kind of mental illness, of which a large percentage of us will suffer at some point in our lives.
Surfinjo is right and wrong at the same time. In the end, if you have a mental illness and you get the right help, you will be taken through a process which eventually, after what could be a lengthy therapy situation depending on the severity of your illness, will lead to a process of taking control of your life (of which the first step could be as simple as being able to leave the house and go to a shop).
However, this process cannot be shortcut just by giving comments like "you need to take control", so as a description of what needs to happen in the long term, it's not that inaccurate, but it is of no help whatsoever to someone who is currently in clinical depression and hasn't been helped half way out of it yet.
It should also be pointed out that there are some people whose condition is such that they might never reach this point. My wife has been a therapist working in the nhs for almost 30 years, so she works with people who need this kind of help every day. Unfortunately there is not enough support in this country for mental illness, and it's patchy across the different regions.
Surfinjo is right and wrong at the same time. In the end, if you have a mental illness and you get the right help, you will be taken through a process which eventually, after what could be a lengthy therapy situation depending on the severity of your illness, will lead to a process of taking control of your life (of which the first step could be as simple as being able to leave the house and go to a shop).
However, this process cannot be shortcut just by giving comments like "you need to take control", so as a description of what needs to happen in the long term, it's not that inaccurate, but it is of no help whatsoever to someone who is currently in clinical depression and hasn't been helped half way out of it yet.
It should also be pointed out that there are some people whose condition is such that they might never reach this point. My wife has been a therapist working in the nhs for almost 30 years, so she works with people who need this kind of help every day. Unfortunately there is not enough support in this country for mental illness, and it's patchy across the different regions.