You seem to be acknowledging that the worst elements do, in fact, indulge themselves in Open. It's unfortunate, but sandbox games do seem to bring out some people's inner sociopath.
Like in the real world, people who don't like being fodder for sociopaths cross the street, avoid them where they hang out, and try not to encourage them. That's why when some gamer freak wordlessly attacks me (I only play Open) I simply run away so that they can enjoy their frustrated rage by themselves. Open play doesn't have to be a freak-show: you can evade almost all of them simply by not going where they stake out, and being prepared to run (not fight; that just plays into their game) and otherwise do the thing that ruins their entire pathetic existence: have a good time without them.
Open play isn't a pit. But there are some truly pitiful gamers who hang out there, trying to drag everyone they can down to their level. Your bleating man-rage that I'm not willing to get down in the ditch with you and entertain you... Phew, you really need professional help with that. This is just a game. Lighten up and have a happier life.
See, last night I randomly attacked a hauler from an opposing power who was in one of our systems, the assumption being that he was most likely undermining. There was no time for niceties, but he played his cards right and made it out with his hull just about intact and got to a station and I docked up to restock. We got chatting after I informed him that he was obviously on the wrong side and he cheerfully noted that I'd broken his shield module. It was a good chat, about the old days, C64s and BBCs, how mining lasers suck now, planned exploration trips and how we both hoped Thargoids would be suitably scary. We added each other to friends lists and went our merry ways.
The point of this heart warming little tale is this; If he had assumed that I was 'some gamer freak' acting out sociopathic tendancies he would not have spoken to me. He might even have got all upset based on assumptions which, it turned out, would have been rather far from the truth. As you say, this is a game and a lot of people really do need to lighten up. If a player is actually abusive, or dedicates their entire time to stalking and disrupting you is a very different matter to people simply playing the game
as intended.
Honestly, both in this game and EVE, I've met a great number of very friendly and laid back people based purely on the fact that we attempted to blow each other up. Because we are not anti social griefers, we are not the ones shunning interaction, and we are not the ones taking a game
far too seriously.