GalNet News Round Up - 14 July 3309

Paul_Crowther

Senior Community Manager
Frontier
Greetings strands of nerves and blood vessels piloting battle-mechs made of flesh and bone. It's time for another catch up on the latest GalNet news! We'll be covering the last two weeks worth of news stories because we want to ensure you have lots to read and not at all because the writer couldn't be bothered previously! On we go!

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IMPERIAL MOTHER IN MEDICAL EMERGENCY - 3 July 3309
In shocking "Wait, they are still alive?" news, the Imperial Mother of Emperor Arissa Lavigny-Duval, Lady Florence Lavigny, was rushed to a super deluxe medical facility after suffering an unexpected (and so far unknown) medical emergency. Friends and family flocked to her bedside to wish her well, and in the case of a certain Hadrian Duval to try and appear less decapitate-able. News outlets will be monitoring this carefully to really showcase how terrible it is when a super rich royal is potentially near death, casually ignoring the vast number of non-rich people who are currently being brutalised by the space weevils of death.

KOKOLLER MINING INITIATIVE CONCLUDES - 6 July 3309
Good news mining fans! Thanks to the efforts of Independent Pilots, the Kokoller Mining group was successful in their mission to get the supplies they needed more quickly than they could do it themselves. Rather industrious for a mining corporation to outsource the actual mining part of their business description so they can focus solely on the 'Corporation' side of things. The resources are set to be put towards supplying the Thargoid war effort so you can rest assured that all your hard work is being put towards exterminating another species. Contributors to the campaign can now collect their rewards from Utley Hub in the Kokoller system

AZIMUTH PLANS CORPORATE CONVENTION - 10 July 3309
Despite having lost out to Aegis in the recent race to get Thargoid Titan data, Azimuth continue to be the plucky underdog that just wants to abuse science for personal gain. The swish party is a bid to woo potential investors and people with more money than self awareness into helping Azimuth try and claw back some prestige. The event is being covered from Azimuth's own funds, mainly because Independent Pilots don't want anything to do with them. They'll be ferrying bigwigs and fancypants from across the milky way to come look at the cool retro new death machines they've got coming their way.

DELIVER RARITIES FOR AZIMUTH EVENT - 13 July 3309
Having seen how well it went for them last time Azimuth have decided to give the whole "Help us out, please" thing a go again. They're asking for Independent Pilots to help in one of two ways: 1) Deliver rare items so Azimuth can look extra posh at the fundraising event...I mean Corporate Convention and 2) To help protect the rich and famous who might get blown up on the way there on account of them giving the time of day to the group that helped put humanity into an arms race with giant apocalypse bugs from out of this world. Pilots can make their deliveries to Musashi in the Xi Wangda system and redeem bounty vouchers at Cartier City on wanted ships in the system.

That's it for this week. Be sure to keep your biological exoskeletons fueled and maintained in order to slow down the inevitable collapse of their functionality and postpone the cruel realisation that time is an inescapable monster that will eventually claim us all.
 
I'd still advise getting it checked out. The bones are meant to be on the inside. If you see any on the outside it could mean you have invalidated your warranty.
It's not often nowadays that people seem to wish you well aligned and healthy arrangements of hydrocarbons.

I for one thank Paul for his interest in the well being of my meat and offer the same. May all your meat and its support frame remain sturdy, well fueled and unbroken.
 
Dalekanium's a metal, not biological?

Speaking as a mammal, I have an endoskeleton. If Paul "Underscore" Crowther assumes people have exoskeletons then he needs to see a skin doctor, fast. And in the meantime he should buy and use all the moisturiser the pharmacy has in stock.
A dalek is. Flesh (or even a flesh interface per _9mother9horse9eyes9) or metal, it matters not. The dalek is the supreme being in the universe and all other lifeforms must be exterminated. And that includes osseus. In fact, especially osseus.
 
Dalekanium's a metal, not biological?

Speaking as a mammal, I have an endoskeleton. If Paul "Underscore" Crowther assumes people have exoskeletons then he needs to see a skin doctor, fast. And in the meantime he should buy and use all the moisturiser the pharmacy has in stock.
I don't know man. Some of us are a little crusty on the outside. Does that count as an exoskeleton?
 
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