Welcoming acknowledgment fellow oxygen breathing bipedals.
We shall now begin reviewing the data that summarises the passage of time for seven of our Terran planetary rotations.
MILITARIES ON ALERT AS TARANIS APPROACHES - 28 November
The big scary space thing is getting closer to human space! With the Kingfisher having done a rather unceremonious die, is humanity really ready for an intergalactic species to crash our party? I bet they won't even bring a gift.
VISTA GENOMICS BOOSTS BIODATA PAYOUTS - 29 November
Do you like science? Do you like cash? Do you like science AND cash? Well Vista Genomics has a special update just for you! They're boosting payouts of biodata so you can make big moola by waving a torch at a plant and trying to embarrass it into giving you information.
TARANIS UNLEASHES THARGOID INVASION FLEETS - 29 November
Taranis has arrived in Hyades Sector FB-N b7-6 and the Thargoids are here to introduce their new fashion line of "fiery doom". Taranis itself is really rocking the catwalk this season with vibrant shades of swirling maelstrom and caustic death. One fashion reporter is quoted as saying "Agh! My eyes!" which can only mean Taranis glamour is destined to be a bit hit.
HAVOC AS THARGOIDS OVERRUN MULTIPLE SYSTEMS - 30 November
Thargoids are like buses. None for ages and then several of them run over your mate Dave. A whopping nine systems are desperately calling for help as Thargoid ships devastate the systems. Looks like they've a little bit of a bee in their bonnet after Salvation's unsuccessful attempt to obliterate them, meaning the attacks are significantly more merciless and brutal than before. Ships are being wrenched out of hyperspace, stations are being set ablaze and understandably people are a bit panicked. With even more signals on the way it's looking a bit bleak for humanity.
NEW MAELSTROMS INCREASE THARGOID CONQUESTS - 1 December
Who had imminent death in their advent calendar for today? Mines a milk chocolate effigy of a station spiraling into chaos, despair and agony...Oh it's orange flavoured! Maelstroms codenamed Indra and Leigong have arrived in the HIP 20567 system and HIP 8887. They've quickly swarmed these areas with Thargoid vessels and the human cost has been staggering. Gosh, I hope there aren't more of these on the way...
That's it for this week. We'll be back next week with more of the news you've already read, so sit back, relax and chill out to the ambient sounds of society falling apart.
o7
We shall now begin reviewing the data that summarises the passage of time for seven of our Terran planetary rotations.
MILITARIES ON ALERT AS TARANIS APPROACHES - 28 November
The big scary space thing is getting closer to human space! With the Kingfisher having done a rather unceremonious die, is humanity really ready for an intergalactic species to crash our party? I bet they won't even bring a gift.
VISTA GENOMICS BOOSTS BIODATA PAYOUTS - 29 November
Do you like science? Do you like cash? Do you like science AND cash? Well Vista Genomics has a special update just for you! They're boosting payouts of biodata so you can make big moola by waving a torch at a plant and trying to embarrass it into giving you information.
TARANIS UNLEASHES THARGOID INVASION FLEETS - 29 November
Taranis has arrived in Hyades Sector FB-N b7-6 and the Thargoids are here to introduce their new fashion line of "fiery doom". Taranis itself is really rocking the catwalk this season with vibrant shades of swirling maelstrom and caustic death. One fashion reporter is quoted as saying "Agh! My eyes!" which can only mean Taranis glamour is destined to be a bit hit.
HAVOC AS THARGOIDS OVERRUN MULTIPLE SYSTEMS - 30 November
Thargoids are like buses. None for ages and then several of them run over your mate Dave. A whopping nine systems are desperately calling for help as Thargoid ships devastate the systems. Looks like they've a little bit of a bee in their bonnet after Salvation's unsuccessful attempt to obliterate them, meaning the attacks are significantly more merciless and brutal than before. Ships are being wrenched out of hyperspace, stations are being set ablaze and understandably people are a bit panicked. With even more signals on the way it's looking a bit bleak for humanity.
NEW MAELSTROMS INCREASE THARGOID CONQUESTS - 1 December
Who had imminent death in their advent calendar for today? Mines a milk chocolate effigy of a station spiraling into chaos, despair and agony...Oh it's orange flavoured! Maelstroms codenamed Indra and Leigong have arrived in the HIP 20567 system and HIP 8887. They've quickly swarmed these areas with Thargoid vessels and the human cost has been staggering. Gosh, I hope there aren't more of these on the way...
That's it for this week. We'll be back next week with more of the news you've already read, so sit back, relax and chill out to the ambient sounds of society falling apart.
o7
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