I've +1'd your rep for the clear way you explain the game server methods. Maybe this is common knowledge to games players, but I'm not one of them, Elite is the first game I've played in years that does not require friends sitting around a table with pen and paper.
As for the disconnect issue, notwithstanding Lanatir's statement about the number of time he loses his connection, just what is the possibility that your connection will fail at just the right moment to save your skin? I'd suggest very VERY small. 1x10 to a very biggish -ve number.
I've been killed twice by commanders, once through ignorance of the comms system, once because that's all he intended to do to me anyway. Yes it hurts, but their are missions to Kill traders etc., so if you trade, you take your chance (it's only a game).
If your instance disappears during a combat situation the probability of it not being a hardware problem is close to 100%, they should be reported and consigned to Solo Mode