No matter what I do, no matter how I fly, whether entering or exiting a port, it's inevitable and guaranteed.
You have your answer right there - you just need to accept it.
First - are you talking about stations or the larger ground bases with patrol ships? The latter are more complicated - you need to listen to the NPC patrol chatter and time your approach accordingly. This is where
I usually don't bother - there are enough passenger missions that don't involve ground bases that
I don't have to accept those.
Otherwise, space stations are a piece of cake. Line up with the slot at 7.5 km out, get docking permission, then keep your ship cool and your speed high - keep in mind that even if the fuzz manage to start a scan, they need to finish it, too - and that they can't do after you disappear inside the station. It's a bit more difficult with a large ship, especially if there's a Beluga coming the other way, it's laughably easy with a souped up Viper or iCourier. Those don't even need to run cold - at 600 m/s, they just don't have the time to scan you. It does take a bit of trial and error, though, to learn to slow down soon enough so the bounce (a.k.a. lithobreaking) off the station's back (or your pad's tower) doesn't
completely strip your shields

.
Racing approaches in small ships aside, this is what I use for passenger missions:
A ship builder, outfitting and comparison tool for Elite Dangerous
s.orbis.zone
Loadout is for thargoid evac missions, regular PAX missions would get a slightly different loadout, mainly for the cabin allocation, and would also receive a scoop. Not as fast (by a large margin) as the Viper or iCourier, but still fast enough to evade scans. And running cool enough that I can line up with the slot, request docking permission, go silent, pop a heatsink, hit boost and still arrive in the station without getting even close to overheating. Strangely, the ATCs don't complain if you eject a used heatsink inside the station. Bouncing off any superstructure is not recommended in this case, though, as going silent will cancel the shields - so time the boost accordingly.
Leaving the station is even easier - line up with the slot inside the station, full throttle and boost. Boost again until you can charge the FSD, then turn just in time for the direction and vector to align when the countdown hits zero.
Or, in other terms - Git Gud
P.S. If you are using a (A)DC - dump that piece of junk. That space is better used by basically anything else. The only acceptable use may be for fuel barges, Belugas and Cutters. And even in the latter case, that's highly disputable, as the ADC is prone to running the Cutter into anything solid rather than squeezing it through the slot.