Snap, Crackle & Pop

Hello old beans,

Any of you Bally well fine Cmdrs getting any static on your headsets?

I seem to be getting quite a bit recently.

One is an Xbox One player.

Yes, I have tried different controllers, I own 7 of the Bally things, what what.

Any responses that do not include the following references would be greatly appreciated:

1. Get Gud
2. Console Peasant
3. Lol, F...ing console players
4. My mum is looking for you?

Toodly pipsky old beans
 
What do controllers and static have to do with each other and do you mean you're getting random Commanders popping in? Sounds like more of a networking issue. If you're plugging it into your controller, try using a standalone Bluetooth headset maybe.
 
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What do headsets and static have to do with each other and do you mean you're getting random Commanders popping in? Sounds like more of a networking issue. If you're plugging it into your controller, try using a standalone Bluetooth headset maybe.

Bally hell old bean.

That was one way to read something completely different into what one had posted.

10 out of 10 for literal cognitive failure, carry on. You are a Bally well credit to your chosen profession.

In the interest of brevity, one shall make it Bally well simple for. I am afraid one lacks Crayons as one hears you like them, what what.

1. My gaming headset has static in game
2. This started after the last update
3. I have several controllers
4. I have tried them all and the problem persists
5. I have plugged my headset onto several other sound sources and the issue is not present
6. Are you still with me old bean?
7. My Xbox one does pump out static on any other game

Ok, that Bally long list is now out of the way.

Anybody with some common sense like to jump in?

Toodly pipsky old beans
 
Sorry for the typo and late edit. I meant controller instead of headset.

So you're saying it has nothing to do with it but nevertheless felt motivated to mention it... OK.

Carry on.
 
Sorry for the typo and late edit. I meant controller instead of headset.

So you're saying it has nothing to do with it but nevertheless felt motivated to mention it... OK.

Carry on.

Bloody sorry old bean, had a bit of a trying day and took it out on you, sorry.

No excuse really, just bloody poor form.

To make it clear....

One apologises for being a complete and utter .

Please forgive me.

Toodly pipsky old bean
 
How do you have your audio settings set up ?
Are you using Windows Sonic or Dolby Atmos ?

[Settings > All settings > Display & sound > Audio output > Headset format]

.

And to answer your question. No I am not experiencing any sound quality issues post update(s).
 
Bally hell old bean.

That was one way to read something completely different into what one had posted.

10 out of 10 for literal cognitive failure, carry on. You are a Bally well credit to your chosen profession.

In the interest of brevity, one shall make it Bally well simple for. I am afraid one lacks Crayons as one hears you like them, what what.

1. My gaming headset has static in game
2. This started after the last update
3. I have several controllers
4. I have tried them all and the problem persists
5. I have plugged my headset onto several other sound sources and the issue is not present
6. Are you still with me old bean?
7. My Xbox one does pump out static on any other game

Ok, that Bally long list is now out of the way.

Anybody with some common sense like to jump in?

Toodly pipsky old beans

Even though it was a situation of misunderstanding between OP and @WR3ND , that is one of the funniest things I've read on this forum in ages!!

I've enjoyed trying to figure out what word was censored before the sentence about using crayons lmao!

Good form gentlemen both, that has certainly improved my day - thank you for both making me laugh! :D
 
PS @thelion I've not had any problems I'm afraid mate, but I'm on PC anyway, so I suspect it's a whole different box of sardines to the Xbox. Sorry I can't help old chap.
 
PS @thelion I've not had any problems I'm afraid mate, but I'm on PC anyway, so I suspect it's a whole different box of sardines to the Xbox. Sorry I can't help old chap.

You Bas£&*#!

You just had to rub it in, what what

A pox on you Cmdr.

May your finer softer bits fall prey to the itchy gods of the crack, what what?

Tatty bye old bean

PS,.
Keep up the good work old bean, you are greatly appreciated, what what

Toodly pipsky
 
I don't always get TheLion's posts, but I am still entertained. Carry on old bean.

No need to understand me old bean.

Not even my Headmaster did, or the police, or Special Branch.

Insane, danger to the public, most likely to end humanity, blah, blah,blah.

All just words used to hold one back and make one feel a sense of guilt over the bodies.

Did one say bodies? One meant to say victims.

Did one say victims, one actually meant to say collateral damage.

Did one say collateral damage......

Well, I guess we all know where this conversation is going?

Tatty bye and may one also venture a stiff upper lip?

PS.
Those bodies are not mine and they were in the cellar when one moved here.

PPS.
Port and Cigars anyone?, Hmmm? No?
 
I'll go for some Port and a Cubano if you have any to share please Lion?

As for expanding on something @Gully_Foyle said above, I guess it's possible that there is a stubborn piece of dust in your socket? Perhaps a small shriveled piece of a corpse?!

This might sound like I'm winding you up old chap, but I promise I'm not - find a paperclip and unfold it, then bend a piece of it back on itself sharply, so it's long enough to poke into your headphone socket to the bottom. Probably best to switch it off for this though!
Then get some sticky tape, and wrap it around the newly bent paperclip pokey thing, but wrapping it backwards on itself. It's a fiddly job, so you can pinch the starting end of it between the bit of paperclip that you bent back on itself (hope that makes sense).
Then, make several wraps of the tape onto itself, so the sticky bit is on the outside, but wrap tightly so it'll fit inside the jack socket.
Then you have a jack-cleaning pokey device, that you can use to gently poke in, and it should pull out any little bits of dust, body parts, or other carp that might be stuck in there.

It's a fiddly little gizmo, but only costs a couple of pennies, and may help out. It solved one of my old static headsets.

But from your description, I worry it might not be the answer sadly, as you mentioned hearing other voices on the static - were you around any combat areas, or using a fighter, or near a station, that could be faking a voice bleed through? Just a thought, but it could be part of it.

I hope this helps, although I suspect the issue you're describing is a little more complex. Especially as it coincides with the update perfectly. Anyhow, give it a go, will be interesting to see if it works.

I think sticky tape was around in the fourties so should be available, which is something. Good luck you old rascal, and hope it helps!! ;)
 
Bally hell old bean,

Have you been corrupted by Witchcraft?

You have the taint of the evil one about you.

BURN HIM, BURN THE UNBELIEVERN

BURN THE HERETIC!

Not your fault, you was brought up in evil and possibly a bin?

As you have a direct line to what dwells beneath, can you sort ones credit rating out?

Hmmmm, no? Well that was for nothing then?

Toodly pipsky old bean

PS.
Keep your ungodly dark magic ways to yourself and just maybe, I will not send the witch finder Persweever round for you, hmmmmm?

Tatty bye old bean
 
Bally hell old bean,

Have you been corrupted by Witchcraft?

You have the taint of the evil one about you.

BURN HIM, BURN THE UNBELIEVERN

BURN THE HERETIC!

Not your fault, you was brought up in evil and possibly a bin?

As you have a direct line to what dwells beneath, can you sort ones credit rating out?

Hmmmm, no? Well that was for nothing then?

Toodly pipsky old bean

PS.
Keep your ungodly dark magic ways to yourself and just maybe, I will not send the witch finder Persweever round for you, hmmmmm?

Tatty bye old bean

Lmao! I'm not sure how to respond to that?! I guess it's probably the first time I made a practical suggestion though, so you're reply is highly understandable...!

I'll have a chat with old Be'elzebob, see if he can do anything about credit ratings old chap, but I can't promise - he has to find 'bub first, know what.

I was certainly raised in the presence of evil, but we weren't wealthy orphans - had to make do with a small box truth be told. I don't know what it originally contained, but there were printed allusions to some kind of magic whirlpool device on the outside - perhaps it's where I learned my dark magic skills? Or simply where I found the ability to pick locks with paperclips - has gotten me out of the occasional scrape with the law as I aged!

There was another chap who lived in a nearby box as well, he taught me the mysterious art of what one could manage to borrow from pockets, especially when putting various adhesive products to good use. He called the technique "wick-dipping" yet I fear his strange stories actually related to something more nefarious, as he often insisted on placing an old newspaper over his lap when explaining the nuances of dipping one's wick for pleasure. Needless to say I was young and innocent at the time, and he was older than one, and a bit creepy too - Frenchman I believe, ruddy Johnny Foreigner if nothing else.

Anyhow old chap, I have gone on far too much about my sad history, so here's wishing you luck with that paperclip and sticky tape - one has to learn how to dip your wick in a professional manner, say you?

Best regards in your endeavours, and tally ho, rather?!

The Hat :)
 
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