I also played the original F-16 game, the original Elite (bbc/spectrum/c64), X Beyond the Frontier and countless games, but i don't consider any of them to be benchmarks against my current gaming. I have a family and house to run like many on here, so my time is limited more than when i used to be able to think nothing of killing 2 whole days on the original elite without sleep to get to elite (and all because i didn't trust a cassette recorder to save my game).
So what has changed? Well, we got older.. that is the one constant.. the 2nd one which is related to that is that our reactions slow down a bit too .. or if you've regularly gamed.. perhaps been unaffected.. who knows. As I am now in my mid 40's I was so very pleased to see Elite rebooted to its 4th generation.. and like many games i've bought, i always expect to find things i don't like as much as the things i do like.. but one thing Elite Dangerous will do is evolve as time moves on.
For now though, it is playable.. completely playable.. and enjoyable with it for those willing to give it a chance. You are not going to be spoon fed every morsel the game has to offer from the start.. and the starter ship is not intended to be strong.. it is fast.. and with a decent turning circle too if you know about the sweet spot for turning etc along with thrusters. As for weapon recharge speeds when you get their shields down, i presume you have applied extra power to weapons to speed up your recharge time? Even if you have, if you were flying in space and someone shot at your ship, would your engineering crew or internal system not be working as hard as it could to bring your shield online to prevent hull or system damage??
Your post(s) to me just rather sound like you lack the patience you probably used to have, it certainly does not sound either like you've moved away from the game for an hour and done some reading / research to see where you've been going wrong.. only that your first reaction is to demand a refund.
A shame really because i started in a starter ship just like you, not that many days ago now and with lots of breaks in between and i've been progressing slowly to take in the game experience and i've managed just fine.. i've looked at youtube vids, read the game manual, joined the facebook group for more social contacts and have upgraded my ship a few times now with my next upgrade likely tonight to a cobra mkIII (now have 600k in credits which i've built up from discovery, trade, missions, and destroying wanted pilots when i'm able). However, I gave the game a chance, and I think right there is where my experience of gaming separates from yours. So while i'll be enjoying the game i've waited quite a long time for, you'll only go on to complain about whatever game you buy.. next. You can however turn all this around by actually trying.. and giving the game a chance.. but that sir is totally down to you.. and your patience.