Community Event / Creation Abraka Drabble The Old Official Drabble THIS IS AN EX THREAD IT IS DEADED

Status
Thread Closed: Not open for further replies.

Yaffle

Volunteer Moderator
Anyhow while you are waiting, here's a pizza (ish) one. Yes, I may have misread the thread and got the wrong topic.

Beware Greeks bearing gifts

Io. Innermost of Jupiter’s moons. So close that the vast gas giant’s gravity distorts it; tectonics in fast forward making real life hell. Ragnal gazed at it. The surface a pizza like viscous bubbling mass of death and fire.
It wasn’t quite the end he’d expected since that Greek guy had given him the puzzle. Relentlessly he’d pieced it together: that cow (well a white T9) that led to Hera the engineer who made the all-seeing scanner. Then the peacock skinned asp leading him … here.
Down there was the solution. Or death. Only one way to find out…
 
Galactic health warning : excessive consumption of copypasta may result in diarrhoea

The ooze creeped out of Psykokow. Onesies were a pain to get off, especially in the confines of cubicle three.
Just in time.
The onesie hit the floor.
No time to tether himself down in the zero-G gravity.
The thrust propelled him into the door contorting his face and forming a potato shaped imprint in the door.

"PLOP TWIST!" shouted Simoof.
"Simoof you GIT!" came Psykokow's muffled voice, "I knew that coffee tasted off"
"Only the strongest laxative coffee for you kow." snickered simoof. "Anyways, must dash, kerrash is here, toodle-loo!"
Psykokow's reply was drowned out by loud crapping noises.
 

Yaffle

Volunteer Moderator
Acturains. Always with the mega.

‘What is that?’
‘It’s gonna make us rich?’
‘Wrong answer. What is it?’
‘This, my friend, is the most expensive coffee money can buy.’
‘I know what coffee looks like. That is not it.’
‘Well, that’s where you’re wrong. This is black, well, brown gold. It’s partially processed coffee.’
‘What?’
‘I just need to wash these berries out, get them roasted and we have Arcturian Mega Coffee.’
‘There is no such thing as Arcturian Mega Coffee, do you know how angry I am right now?’
‘Not as angry as when you find out how much I spent on the elephant.’
 
Who says tips don't pay

"What's a coffupee machine? Jeff asked reading the armed bot's label within the cafe.

"It's an intelligent server", Brandy said proudly, "more efficient than hired staff, it knows your order just by looking at you, and provides security too".

"REALLY? That sounds dangerously like AI".

"Nonsense, Dav loaned me it".

"Dav's a thief!".

"No, he's with security".

"Brandy the Feds handle security here, Dav's a Black Slip".

"Black Slip? But they're dangerous".

"Yes and their armed coffupee is "servicing" your customers"

The colour drained from Brandy's face as everywhere she looked patrons handed over their wallets and jewellery at gunpoint.
 
Last edited:
How am I suppose to write a Drabble about coffee when I don't even drink it?:(


*singing*

C-O-F-F-E-E
Coffee is not for me.
It's a drink some people wake up with.
That it makes them nervous is no myth.
Slaves to a coffee cup,
they can't give coffee up!

Learned that in elementary school.

[video=youtube;6alqfe7QsNk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6alqfe7QsNk[/video]
 
Last edited:
On the Alert, Watching and Waiting

Hope the rescue team gets here soon.
Stranded, no power, synthesizer off-line, water-recycling out.

All I have, in cargo canisters, is Arcturian Mega-coffee blisters, bought from some guy wearing four pairs of spectacles on his head.

"Best coffee in the Galaxy" he said.

It's bitter, with a strange, grassy after-taste; not my favourite, but there's little choice. At least I'm alive, and wide-awake, eyes glued to the battery powered scanner, waiting for the rescuers to come and take me off this barren rock.

In the silence, every time I sip the coffee, I hear a weird trumpeting. Tinnitus, I guess.


_________________________________________________

PS. Please read Yaffle's drabble before reading this.

PPS. Thanks for the inspiration, Yaffle :D
 
Last edited:
003302

The man walked down the aisle of the Orca. He sat down next to a beautiful lady, possibly a Federal bureaucrat.
"My name is Bond." He said. "Varati Bond."
"Pleased to meet you, Mr. Bond." She replied. Bond noticed a waitress, who was distributing delicacies to the passengers, was slowly making her way towards him. As she passed his chair, she let a delicacy drop to the floor. A red light started flashing. Bond jumped out of his seat and rushed to the bathroom, slamming the door shut just in time. Fits of coughing commenced as the Instant-Cough-E bomb detonated.
 
A conversation at 7am

"You can't make good tea on a Coriolis; the low pressure makes the water boils too cold, the infusion is wrong and it tastes awful. Coffee though, you can make *good* coffee; just keep the filter and the pot around eighty Celsius. It can be dangerous storing coffee that hot, but the taste is worth it. That's why I come here every morning, Harry makes good coffee"

I scalded the duct-rat's crotch with hot coffee and glanced meaningfully at the pistol he'd come at me with.

"Now, who paid you to interrupt my breakfast and where can I find them"
 
A Story That's Been Percolating Around

At the bar inside Starbuck’s Bar and Cafe, Nero Whittard looked down at the dead eye lying on the table in front of him.

It looked like it had dropped out of a weasel’s ass, but he’d a bet to win.

After a deep breath, he picked it up and finished it in two gulps.

He slapped the table and stood, partly to emphasise his accomplishment, but also to mask the queasiness he felt.

“Hurray for the Americano” the locals cheered.

Nero hated living like this, but he’d had to go to ground after President Halsey had been found alive.
 
Status
Thread Closed: Not open for further replies.
Back
Top Bottom