Yep, absolutely. And I do 100% agree with your thoughts that PvP should be integrated more into optional parts the game. Encouraging areas of activity for players. Systems with proper security and lack of security make total sense.
But keep in mind you are discussing on the forum with people that are quite familiar with Deciat, where a noob getting their ship engineered learns real fast to switch into Solo. It is the main impression that non PvP players have. (I know I shouldn't be talking on everybody's behalf. Bad form).
It is seldom I see on the forums an adherent of PvP promoting players to not play in Open if they don't feel comfortable with it.
Well its funny, because, though it might be hard to believe, most PvPer's went through the same thing. Though not Deciat, though its a good example, I remember back when i started Elite, I was killed very early into the game by someone far more skilled and better outfitted than myself, but I engaged them in conversation, made a good friend and learned a lot from them about how to survive, and eventually how to fight effectively.
It took time, and hundreds of rebuys, but eventually I got to the point where i was more capable than most in PvP encounters, after a while, I became one of the best players on the platform at the time (PS4 years ago when it was actually supported).
Instead of seeing my killers as problematic, I saw their position as something to aim for, not as a ganker initially, but purely out of the need to have to potentially defend myself should the same thing happen again. It didn't detter me from playing Open, and I would never tell players to go to Solo or PG to avoid conflict as a result, merely suggest that they should make friends with the people who do gank or do what limited amounts of PvP Powerplay that remains and at the very least learn to survive even if they don't want to choose active combat as a playstyle.
Likely its the same for most PvP players, of course its a different mindset to that of your PvE players, but being faced with adversity, no matter how steep the hill appears at first, is no reason to avoid it, embracing it is much better for a player's growth in the long term and makes them far more capable. If they choose in the long run to avoid it entirely, they're equipped with both the experience and knowledge of how to survive or massively mitigate the risks and in turn suffer very little.
Can it be harsh getting obliterated by a G5 FDL in a starter ship, of course, I would'nt even attempt to claim its not. Though equally, its something you benefit from being aware of.
I fully support the use of Solo/PG for players to get up to speed and at least work towards the insane powercreep the game has regarding ship power levels, but I find it very hard to understand the mindset of wanting to entirely avoid any sort of interaction regarding said players simply due to one bad experience.
Of course, some people are just unpleasant for the sake of it, but thats true of every game community, PvP or PvE, but that is not the majority and judging the masses by one or two bad eggs is a good portion of the reason that this community is the way that it is.
By FDev tying PvP back into the game at large, this starts to be mended, allbeit potentially slowly, but by putting PvP in a more applicable light regarding the games systems, then alliances and mercenary groups will start to form, which in turn allows for a greater degree of community and community driven effort.
There do have to be sacrifices for this though, such as Powerplay becoming an Open Only based activity, but the potential outcomes are far more worthwhile than the situation we have currently where there is disrespect from both sides which is allowed to perpetuate via the modes system having free access, and thusly in some cases, more benifits than others.
PvP players will always end up randomly murder hoboing if there is no content to support their playstyle, and PvE players will always end up hating them for it.
Until the game design fundamentally changes, this problem will be perpetuated ad infinitum.