Elite With Chuck Norris

Some beard jokes:

Sagittarius A is a byproduct of when Chuck Norris trimmed his beard.

Chuck Norris does not plot a course, he relies on his beard for navigation.

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks open wormholes, granting safe passage for ships comforted by his beard.

Other Chuck Norris ED puns:

Chuck Norris does not request docking, the station requests to dock on him.

When you get intridicted by Chuck Norris, he does not pull you out of super cruise, he pulls you out of the universe.

Chuck Norris does not travel around the galaxy, the galaxy travels around him.

When Chuck Norris farts, a galaxy is born.
 
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The shields of Chuck Norris' ship regenerate at greater than 1MJ/s.

NPCs have infinite ammo. But Chuck Norris has twice as many ammo as all NPCs combined.

Pirates always try to interdict Chuck Norris in order to donate him heaps of gold. Naturally, they always fail.

"First discovered by" is a lie. You are always second, long after Chuck Norris has already been there.

Chuck Norris can already land on all planets (and has done so twice). He just decided to allow us the airless ones eventually.
 
The shields of Chuck Norris' ship regenerate at greater than 1MJ/s.

Chuck Norris doesn't need shields; weapons fire is scared of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris considers Anarchy Systems a quiet place to relax.

When pirates meet Chuck Norris, *they* give him their cargo.

The reason there are no comets in E: D is because Chuck Norris made them all into ice cream.

When Chuck Norris just looks at an assassination mission, the target self-destructs.

When you KW-Scan Chuck Norris, *you* become Wanted.

Chuck Norris uses Anacondas as tooth-picks.
 
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