ok, an update.
I just stole my daughters xbox one pad, magically the contexts are now showing and working as intended, plugged the PS pad back in, nothing, tried the PS5 pad, nothing, put the xbox pad back in, they work (yes I changed controller setting multiple times just to make sure)
Tried with and without DS4, no "joy"
I dunno what they have done, but its effecting PS pads but not xbox pads, very weird.
so, all you guys/gals out there with ps pad issues, buy or borrow an xbox pad until/IF they fix it.