This is core thing that's wrong with your post, and the reason why the rest of it is wrong
Adding VR in this circumstance, to a reasonable standard, is not easy or straight-forward.
NMS, as you pointed out, got it done (post launch). But to do it to a reasonable standard that required the addition of: virtual cockpit interfaces, a complete remodelling / resizing of the spaceship cockpit, vehicle internal views, an adapted UI system, a new interface system for object interaction, a new base building interface, hand-held weapons, their own variants of relative motion including nausea tests. Etc etc etc etc etc. Certain aspects were never brought to parity (the sniper zoom for example), or taken to a polished level (roomscale was never officially supported). And performance remains a major issue to this day for many players, with the CPU load of the proc gen planets proving a particular issue. (I only solved my personal PCVR issues with it by buying a new CPU...)
It's not a switch. It's a massive design & engineering process which also impacts the game design for the classic game when multiplayer is in the mix.
All of the above are the type of issues FDev would have to deal with if they were to tackle it in earnest. It's not 'laziness' that they haven't. It's a perfectly understandable bit of risk aversion given the frankly rubbish ROI in the VR world. NMS have the luxury of sitting on a pot of gold (they've sold spectacularly well and have a small team). They can make this particular passion play with less risk to the company and the project as a whole.
Flip a switch in your head. And realise that adding VR + FPS to a multiplayer vehicle game set in a proc gen open world is not easy.
And then badger FDev to add it anyway, in a more reasonable fashion