Community Event / Creation Abraka Drabble The Old Official Drabble THIS IS AN EX THREAD IT IS DEADED
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Warning! Incoming Pun
The Mayor asked "You checked the figures? there's no doubt?"
The holo-projected head was grim "We contacted you as soon as we were sure of the facts. It's what happened to New Belgium 200 years ago. It took 10 years to evacuate."
The mayor sighed. He was going to lose his next election. "The worst thing are those idiots who don't believe in Newtonian Physics. Hopefully some of them will see sense when the weather goes haywire. I'd better tell the people. What do you call a Red Dwarf that wanders into a populated system?"
The astronomer grimaced, "A nuisance!"
The Mayor asked "You checked the figures? there's no doubt?"
The holo-projected head was grim "We contacted you as soon as we were sure of the facts. It's what happened to New Belgium 200 years ago. It took 10 years to evacuate."
The mayor sighed. He was going to lose his next election. "The worst thing are those idiots who don't believe in Newtonian Physics. Hopefully some of them will see sense when the weather goes haywire. I'd better tell the people. What do you call a Red Dwarf that wanders into a populated system?"
The astronomer grimaced, "A nuisance!"
A slight advantage goes a long way
As the shouting intensified. he muttered to himself "The one time I have an advantage this happens".
It's not fair one wailed 'I've trained for months, I've had two triple hernias y'know!'
'Yeah' moaned another 'look at him it's not right, I've bent over backwards to try to win and HE turns up.' an accusing finger pointed at him.
Ro a man of limited stature sighed as the Eraninan intergalactic limbo contest descended into a chaotic but flexible melee of fists and teeth.
'Would it help if I wore a tall hat?' He shouted over the cacophony and flying bodyparts.
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The producers would like to point out that no Scotsmen were harmed in the making of this Drabble.
As the shouting intensified. he muttered to himself "The one time I have an advantage this happens".
It's not fair one wailed 'I've trained for months, I've had two triple hernias y'know!'
'Yeah' moaned another 'look at him it's not right, I've bent over backwards to try to win and HE turns up.' an accusing finger pointed at him.
Ro a man of limited stature sighed as the Eraninan intergalactic limbo contest descended into a chaotic but flexible melee of fists and teeth.
'Would it help if I wore a tall hat?' He shouted over the cacophony and flying bodyparts.
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The producers would like to point out that no Scotsmen were harmed in the making of this Drabble.
In the Gloamin
Dedicated to Listeri69. You asked and hopefully I delivered (almost)
---
Barefoot and radiant in an off-white diaphanous creation, bejewelled with 300 fawn tears,
suspended in a gossamer of spider-silk, emphasizing every nuance of her toned frame, Bashful drew
appreciative gasps, and occasional moans, from the assembled throng.
Dopey, having forsaken recreational narcotics for true love, was resplendent in a dark-grey, linen
suit, cream cravat (with gold nugget tie-pin) and black Lavian catskin shoes, throbbed longingly when he saw her.
Afterwards, the couple, now running a booming business providing flavoured, frigid bovidae lactate
to over 200 systems, left for their honeymoon wandering the stars.
A musical honour guard accompanied their departure.
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[Psykokow you hopefully know what to do at this point]
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Dedicated to Listeri69. You asked and hopefully I delivered (almost)
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Barefoot and radiant in an off-white diaphanous creation, bejewelled with 300 fawn tears,
suspended in a gossamer of spider-silk, emphasizing every nuance of her toned frame, Bashful drew
appreciative gasps, and occasional moans, from the assembled throng.
Dopey, having forsaken recreational narcotics for true love, was resplendent in a dark-grey, linen
suit, cream cravat (with gold nugget tie-pin) and black Lavian catskin shoes, throbbed longingly when he saw her.
Afterwards, the couple, now running a booming business providing flavoured, frigid bovidae lactate
to over 200 systems, left for their honeymoon wandering the stars.
A musical honour guard accompanied their departure.
---
[Psykokow you hopefully know what to do at this point]
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Ian Phillips
Volunteer Moderator
Chinese whispers
"And the collonades come here, amongst the palm trees", the architect said, waving his arms around whilst indicating an area of the docking bay. The group of hangers-on looked suitably impressed nodded at each other.
The Senator's aide came hurrying up to them, out of breath and flustered.
"Master Architect, I need to speak to you urgently", he managed to gasp out between breaths.
"What is it, can't you see I'm busy giving instructions for the Imperial visit preparations?"
"It's about the communication we recieved, there has been a misunderstanding.
Someone transcribed the theme of 'Roman Dwarves' as 'Romaned Wharves'!"
"And the collonades come here, amongst the palm trees", the architect said, waving his arms around whilst indicating an area of the docking bay. The group of hangers-on looked suitably impressed nodded at each other.
The Senator's aide came hurrying up to them, out of breath and flustered.
"Master Architect, I need to speak to you urgently", he managed to gasp out between breaths.
"What is it, can't you see I'm busy giving instructions for the Imperial visit preparations?"
"It's about the communication we recieved, there has been a misunderstanding.
Someone transcribed the theme of 'Roman Dwarves' as 'Romaned Wharves'!"
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01 - azdour - Is bigger better?
02 - Philip Coutts - A New Roman Empire
03 - Goose4291 - In the Depths
04 - Frank - Warning! Incoming Pun
05 - T.j - A slight advantage goes a long way
06 - MrMogadon - In the Gloamin
07 - Ian Phillips - Chinese whispers
Welcome to this week's Drabble Contest.
Everyone is invited to submit a Drabble. When I say everyone, I specifically mean you!
A Drabble is story of exactly 100 words, and should be set in the Elite Universe on the current topic of
The Roman Dwarves
chosen by Simoof, Psykokow's smarter older brother, who won last week's contest with a cracking little Drabble.
The title of your story isn't part of the 100 words total.
A good place to compose your story is recommended by Erik, http://www.wordcounter.net/
Entries to a poll will be limited to the first 20 Drabbles submitted. As you can see, 7 of those slots have already been taken so if you want to enter you'd better get Drabbling! This week is an especially good time for newcomers. Nobody is expecting any good entries for a subject as daft as "The Roman Dwarves" <sheesh>.
Only one entry per candidate. Ihe poll normally goes up on Thursday. I'll do it this week... unless somebody else fancies a go on the chariot's reins.
Please remember that this is a family forum We want as many people as possible to feel comfortable on this thread. Don't write anything that you wouldn't want to read out in front of your grandparent/grandchild.
02 - Philip Coutts - A New Roman Empire
03 - Goose4291 - In the Depths
04 - Frank - Warning! Incoming Pun
05 - T.j - A slight advantage goes a long way
06 - MrMogadon - In the Gloamin
07 - Ian Phillips - Chinese whispers
Welcome to this week's Drabble Contest.
Everyone is invited to submit a Drabble. When I say everyone, I specifically mean you!
A Drabble is story of exactly 100 words, and should be set in the Elite Universe on the current topic of
The Roman Dwarves
chosen by Simoof, Psykokow's smarter older brother, who won last week's contest with a cracking little Drabble.
The title of your story isn't part of the 100 words total.
A good place to compose your story is recommended by Erik, http://www.wordcounter.net/
Entries to a poll will be limited to the first 20 Drabbles submitted. As you can see, 7 of those slots have already been taken so if you want to enter you'd better get Drabbling! This week is an especially good time for newcomers. Nobody is expecting any good entries for a subject as daft as "The Roman Dwarves" <sheesh>.
Only one entry per candidate. Ihe poll normally goes up on Thursday. I'll do it this week... unless somebody else fancies a go on the chariot's reins.
Please remember that this is a family forum We want as many people as possible to feel comfortable on this thread. Don't write anything that you wouldn't want to read out in front of your grandparent/grandchild.
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Well this was tricky to write this week. I enjoyed writing my smuggling drabble (Vengeance) a couple of weeks ago, so much so that I'm trying to keep the story going as a chain of prequels. Thanks Simoof for making it easier... not! 
Escaping the wrath
Neck-deep in the water of Bears Bay we watch our attacker float past.
My aide Carr shares my thoughts. "Mal Guild assassin, I recognised his mark. Your success De'Gal shames the Mal dynasty and brings the wrath of Malum herself"
"Don't call me that" I reply automatically, "she lost us the right to that title... De'Mhal-Um's shame! For Decadencia's honour we must repair the offence to the emperor. Regaining ancestral titles is the least of it".
Heaving ourselves into a nearby boat I see the harbour ahead.
Suddenly realising my family's vulnerability I shout. "Row man! The wharf's right there".
Escaping the wrath
Neck-deep in the water of Bears Bay we watch our attacker float past.
My aide Carr shares my thoughts. "Mal Guild assassin, I recognised his mark. Your success De'Gal shames the Mal dynasty and brings the wrath of Malum herself"
"Don't call me that" I reply automatically, "she lost us the right to that title... De'Mhal-Um's shame! For Decadencia's honour we must repair the offence to the emperor. Regaining ancestral titles is the least of it".
Heaving ourselves into a nearby boat I see the harbour ahead.
Suddenly realising my family's vulnerability I shout. "Row man! The wharf's right there".
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Blimey this was a tricky one. I had to delve deep.
In Therapy
It was the year I gave up dreaming.
Any other shrink would do the same. Listening for hours to sociopathic traders, narcissistic bounty hunters and obsessive pirates does things to your head.
Really, my analyst told me, I should have had it done years ago. He did. Zorgon Peterson Medical. Like a vasectomy for the brain, he said.
Consciously, I could deal with it. But unconsciously? Well, the dreams were the worst. Sphinxes selling beetroot ice creams. Aisling Duval with a sharpened whisk. A crazy buccaneering cow.
And - dear gods - a dozen Roman Dwarves. In lingerie.
It's still too soon.
In Therapy
It was the year I gave up dreaming.
Any other shrink would do the same. Listening for hours to sociopathic traders, narcissistic bounty hunters and obsessive pirates does things to your head.
Really, my analyst told me, I should have had it done years ago. He did. Zorgon Peterson Medical. Like a vasectomy for the brain, he said.
Consciously, I could deal with it. But unconsciously? Well, the dreams were the worst. Sphinxes selling beetroot ice creams. Aisling Duval with a sharpened whisk. A crazy buccaneering cow.
And - dear gods - a dozen Roman Dwarves. In lingerie.
It's still too soon.
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Helmet Boils
Titus Minimus sat in the ice cream van, sales were low this week, they had been for some time.
The rumour was the Emperor was nibbling on Titus's flake when he went comatose. and its hard to recover from negative publicity.
She needed a sales pitch. The idea came from a low budget movie, rented on a trip to Winnard's hole,
'Small Boil's around Uranus' Starring Susan Boils. It was the little fancy helmets they all wore.
You buy an Ice Cream, I'll give you a Dwarf Roman Helmet he wrote on a sign.
for some reason sales stayed low.....
Titus Minimus sat in the ice cream van, sales were low this week, they had been for some time.
The rumour was the Emperor was nibbling on Titus's flake when he went comatose. and its hard to recover from negative publicity.
She needed a sales pitch. The idea came from a low budget movie, rented on a trip to Winnard's hole,
'Small Boil's around Uranus' Starring Susan Boils. It was the little fancy helmets they all wore.
You buy an Ice Cream, I'll give you a Dwarf Roman Helmet he wrote on a sign.
for some reason sales stayed low.....
Crazy Roman
Roman?
Crazy as a sack of weasels on heat and twice as vicious, he’s in charge of the Daedalus Weaponised Armoured Response Force and right now is in the Daedalus’ brig cooling down.
It’s not the first time and as sure as Bog Spaniels stink it won’t be his last.
See, we got some shore leave and hit the strip last night and everything was hunky-dory until some Marines went and tried to make a name for themselves.
Just the one problem though; only Roman’s D.W.A.R.F.s are allowed to call him Snow White.
And to think they called me Dopey.
Roman?
Crazy as a sack of weasels on heat and twice as vicious, he’s in charge of the Daedalus Weaponised Armoured Response Force and right now is in the Daedalus’ brig cooling down.
It’s not the first time and as sure as Bog Spaniels stink it won’t be his last.
See, we got some shore leave and hit the strip last night and everything was hunky-dory until some Marines went and tried to make a name for themselves.
Just the one problem though; only Roman’s D.W.A.R.F.s are allowed to call him Snow White.
And to think they called me Dopey.
Waylaid
"Seven hours before he wakes," said Rose as they walked back to the dock where Kalran slept inside his Orca. "Dinner was great at 'Little Rome'. I couldn't believe the production they put on over that Ceasar salad though."
"Aye, 'twas funny," said Shamus as a midget darted out of the shadows, cut Rose's purse strap and started high-tailing with his newly acquired loot.
They ran after the wee thing around several corners. Rose was sure they'd lost him when Shamus reached into a shadow and pulled the hidden midget out.
"Midget thieves; they can run, but they can't height!"
"Seven hours before he wakes," said Rose as they walked back to the dock where Kalran slept inside his Orca. "Dinner was great at 'Little Rome'. I couldn't believe the production they put on over that Ceasar salad though."
"Aye, 'twas funny," said Shamus as a midget darted out of the shadows, cut Rose's purse strap and started high-tailing with his newly acquired loot.
They ran after the wee thing around several corners. Rose was sure they'd lost him when Shamus reached into a shadow and pulled the hidden midget out.
"Midget thieves; they can run, but they can't height!"
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Oh dear god, I don't know if that is genius or a banning offence
I figure the old adage, An eye for an eye applies here. Terrible topic, terrible puns.
I figure the old adage, An eye for an eye applies here. Terrible topic, terrible puns.
I think you meant to say terrifying topic, terrifying puns. And yours was truly terrifying. I even screamed as primal emotions leaped out of me! Even Frank wouldn't subject us to such horror
And we're all being subjected to this just because someone wants to torture his brother. You know, I'm quite warming to Simoof
You gonna vote for him again Frank? I couldn't help but notice you'd already thought of a torture topic yourself
Morituri Te Salutant
Cassius strolled purposefully towards the loading bay rubbing his hands gleefully at the anticipated return from this trip.
-Ha! So much for the ridiculous imperial regulation allowing only one slave per canister. Dwarves were MY idea see, I just stack one on top of another, twos-up I call it… here let me show you… ...what the hell, whose been messing with the lock on this canister?
-Oh no…
A small figure dropped a card on the two bodies embossed with the logo 'Little Peoples Collegium Chapter XVIII'. On the card he paused to scrawl 'Twos down' before moving quickly away.
Cassius strolled purposefully towards the loading bay rubbing his hands gleefully at the anticipated return from this trip.
-Ha! So much for the ridiculous imperial regulation allowing only one slave per canister. Dwarves were MY idea see, I just stack one on top of another, twos-up I call it… here let me show you… ...what the hell, whose been messing with the lock on this canister?
-Oh no…
A small figure dropped a card on the two bodies embossed with the logo 'Little Peoples Collegium Chapter XVIII'. On the card he paused to scrawl 'Twos down' before moving quickly away.
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You gonna vote for him again Frank? I couldn't help but notice you'd already thought of a torture topic yourself
Just look at paauggie's Drabble. There are still some amazing Drabbles coming in. I'd hate to commit myself at this early stage. As for choosing a subject with which to torture Psykokow. well, I do remember suggesting a "Psykokow must die" topic, and that kind of backfired on me. People had the audacity to kill me instead.
For one night only: The Fabulous Theramin Dwarves
OoooEeeeWoooooAhhhhhhWeeeWeeeeeeee...
Clint closed his eyes as the trio, up from planetside on tour, rocked out on the low stage in the far corner of the bar.
This coriolis maintained 2G to accomodate the high-G planetsiders, and after only a day, his bones ached. You celebrate your birthday wherever you can when you haul for a living.
SqueeeeeeeWeeWeeeeWoooooAhhhhhOoooWibbleyOooooo...
Beards flying, the tiny guys were furiously working their theramins, but he'd never liked classical music. Taking another big hit from the bottle, he tried to ignore the cake with the suspiciously close 'L' and 'I' his crew had made.
Worst. Birthday. Ever.
OoooEeeeWoooooAhhhhhhWeeeWeeeeeeee...
Clint closed his eyes as the trio, up from planetside on tour, rocked out on the low stage in the far corner of the bar.
This coriolis maintained 2G to accomodate the high-G planetsiders, and after only a day, his bones ached. You celebrate your birthday wherever you can when you haul for a living.
SqueeeeeeeWeeWeeeeWoooooAhhhhhOoooWibbleyOooooo...
Beards flying, the tiny guys were furiously working their theramins, but he'd never liked classical music. Taking another big hit from the bottle, he tried to ignore the cake with the suspiciously close 'L' and 'I' his crew had made.
Worst. Birthday. Ever.
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