People are going to start reading my Drabbles instead of watching the news.
Community Event / Creation Abraka Drabble The Old Official Drabble THIS IS AN EX THREAD IT IS DEADED
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People are going to start reading my Drabbles instead of watching the news.
Part Five - The Art of Distraction
The captain worriedly checked the scanner. There it was again, that tell-tale blip on the screen that made him itch inside his head. How the hell were they following him? No-one should have been capable of trailing him through so many random jumps, no-one!
Rage enveloped him as he dropped the ship out of Super-cruise. “As soon as that blasted ship appears” he yelled at the crew “hit it with all we have!”
As if on cue, the pursuer appeared. Missiles streaked towards it, beams cutting the void.
The cobra never stood a chance.
Its payload however, slipped on unseen.
The captain worriedly checked the scanner. There it was again, that tell-tale blip on the screen that made him itch inside his head. How the hell were they following him? No-one should have been capable of trailing him through so many random jumps, no-one!
Rage enveloped him as he dropped the ship out of Super-cruise. “As soon as that blasted ship appears” he yelled at the crew “hit it with all we have!”
As if on cue, the pursuer appeared. Missiles streaked towards it, beams cutting the void.
The cobra never stood a chance.
Its payload however, slipped on unseen.
Jumping with the crew, featuring Run CQC
Old style new style making with the crew style, jumping in a sidey with a pulse on top.
Cruising, losing, jumping while I'm musing, dreaming of the big one when the grind will stop
Scooping, hauling, illegal cargo trawling, taking on a mission when you know you'll flop
Irate, pirate, homing in on my wake, boosting for the station cos' your shields will drop
Locking, docking, trading all the rock in, giving up the mining cause the pays a crock
Saving up, trading up,
voice attack and droid
Plot a route to Sag A and
head off into the void
Old style new style making with the crew style, jumping in a sidey with a pulse on top.
Cruising, losing, jumping while I'm musing, dreaming of the big one when the grind will stop
Scooping, hauling, illegal cargo trawling, taking on a mission when you know you'll flop
Irate, pirate, homing in on my wake, boosting for the station cos' your shields will drop
Locking, docking, trading all the rock in, giving up the mining cause the pays a crock
Saving up, trading up,
voice attack and droid
Plot a route to Sag A and
head off into the void
A standard anarchy bog in a bog standard anarchy
It was typical of an anarchy station, the maintenence crew either didn't come for fear of their lives, or the brave few who did ended up target practice for the local pirates.
As a result, lavatorial ettiquete was as anarchic as everything else.
'At least this should be amusing' thought the station commander as he rigged up the motion sensor above the urinals. To test it, he gave it a wave.
The tannoy came to life.
"Will members of the crew with short joysticks and high manifold pressure, please taxi closer before opening dump valve"
Smiling, he left the gents.
It was typical of an anarchy station, the maintenence crew either didn't come for fear of their lives, or the brave few who did ended up target practice for the local pirates.
As a result, lavatorial ettiquete was as anarchic as everything else.
'At least this should be amusing' thought the station commander as he rigged up the motion sensor above the urinals. To test it, he gave it a wave.
The tannoy came to life.
"Will members of the crew with short joysticks and high manifold pressure, please taxi closer before opening dump valve"
Smiling, he left the gents.
sCREWed
The room was smoke filled and smelled like a sumo wrestlers groin.
"Arrr, I love em like me own children. You wont find finer equipment anywhere else"
Thomas was surprised to find his kind this far out in deep space.
"You said it has customised scoops, larger than regulations, arrr?" inquired the skipper.
The captain suddenly appeared - "Ye'd better have something special or you'll be fodder for this ere blaster o'mine"
Thomas realised his mistake. These were goddam pirates.
Sitting on the next pad was a pristine McCormick MC130. "PEW-PEW"
The smoke suddenly cleared. Thomas was now an ex-tractor fan.
The room was smoke filled and smelled like a sumo wrestlers groin.
"Arrr, I love em like me own children. You wont find finer equipment anywhere else"
Thomas was surprised to find his kind this far out in deep space.
"You said it has customised scoops, larger than regulations, arrr?" inquired the skipper.
The captain suddenly appeared - "Ye'd better have something special or you'll be fodder for this ere blaster o'mine"
Thomas realised his mistake. These were goddam pirates.
Sitting on the next pad was a pristine McCormick MC130. "PEW-PEW"
The smoke suddenly cleared. Thomas was now an ex-tractor fan.
Busted
“Barnard Control, this is the Cochon Noire requesting docking clearance”
“Welcome back Captain. Prior to clearance, please confirm crew roster. New regulations you see” (barely controlled sniggering is just audible)
“Kipper me capstans, are you serious?”
An insincere “Sorry” (with slightly more audible sniggering)
“If I must, you lolliping landlubbers.
Crew members are:
Master Mates, Seamen Barnabas and Willy”
“Really?”
“ ‘Fraid so, and not forgetting..”
Whispered, “Please, please, please”
“..Tom the cabin boy”
Silence
“Really? Your master isn’t called Bates”
“Nope. No Staines either and Tom’s name definitely is Tom not Roger.
Don’t believe everything you read on Galnet”
“Barnard Control, this is the Cochon Noire requesting docking clearance”
“Welcome back Captain. Prior to clearance, please confirm crew roster. New regulations you see” (barely controlled sniggering is just audible)
“Kipper me capstans, are you serious?”
An insincere “Sorry” (with slightly more audible sniggering)
“If I must, you lolliping landlubbers.
Crew members are:
Master Mates, Seamen Barnabas and Willy”
“Really?”
“ ‘Fraid so, and not forgetting..”
Whispered, “Please, please, please”
“..Tom the cabin boy”
Silence
“Really? Your master isn’t called Bates”
“Nope. No Staines either and Tom’s name definitely is Tom not Roger.
Don’t believe everything you read on Galnet”
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Awesome +1
I'm intrigued, what did you think it was going to be about?
You can PM me if it's too lewd for public consumption
I'm intrigued, what did you think it was going to be about?
You can PM me if it's too lewd for public consumption
I won't bother PM-ing you but I can confirm that it was too lewd for public consumption (PM-ing still means Private Messaging, doesn't it?)
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The Birdy Dance...
Psykokow looked annoyed
'You sure this is the right man for our ship?' he poked the new arrival in the chest several times. 'he seems a bit, you know, small'
'I've been told he's the greatest crew member the galaxy' Simoof got up out of the pilots chair, 'Besides he was going cheap'
'What like a Parrot?'
'For the last time we're not getting a Parrot' Simoof exclaimed..
'But you've have had a cockatoo before now' We could have spent them credits on a lovely parrot instead of this...scum...
The scum fired his laser
They never learn said Docstone..
Psykokow looked annoyed
'You sure this is the right man for our ship?' he poked the new arrival in the chest several times. 'he seems a bit, you know, small'
'I've been told he's the greatest crew member the galaxy' Simoof got up out of the pilots chair, 'Besides he was going cheap'
'What like a Parrot?'
'For the last time we're not getting a Parrot' Simoof exclaimed..
'But you've have had a cockatoo before now' We could have spent them credits on a lovely parrot instead of this...scum...
The scum fired his laser
They never learn said Docstone..
The Alien Chronicles: Part 7
Cmdr Alien was in the galley of The Equinox. All the crew were eager to talk to her, as their ten year plan was to explore strange new lifeforms, to seek out new worlds and new civilizations, to baldly go where no-one has gone before.
"Shouldn't it be boldly goes?" Alien asked.
"Well, it would be, but Captain Ferbus had the daily mission pledge changed when he was younger."
At that moment, Ferbus walked in, he suddenly realised his crew were watching him and put his hat on.
Alien had to ask "Is his last name Sammarco by some chance?"
Cmdr Alien was in the galley of The Equinox. All the crew were eager to talk to her, as their ten year plan was to explore strange new lifeforms, to seek out new worlds and new civilizations, to baldly go where no-one has gone before.
"Shouldn't it be boldly goes?" Alien asked.
"Well, it would be, but Captain Ferbus had the daily mission pledge changed when he was younger."
At that moment, Ferbus walked in, he suddenly realised his crew were watching him and put his hat on.
Alien had to ask "Is his last name Sammarco by some chance?"
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Where did you get the Simpsons version of yourself done?
Ian Phillips
Volunteer Moderator
I'm just going away to wash my eyes out..... reading this I suddenly had a vision of Simoof with his nose in a sumo wrestlers groin.....
The "Drabble Far"
Come with me and meet the crew
of the Python "Drabble Far"
Commander Psykokow aims her
at the heart of every star.
The engine room makes such strange sounds
under Simoof tender care,
Gunner Frank mans the turret beams,
escort fighter Kerrash beware!
Take a journey to a distant star
With the crew of the Python “Drabble Far”
Simon Winnard on the comms
causes hardly any wars,
Doc Stone's bedside manner gives
all his patients woe good cause.
Mogadon and Gal Midden
can smash any cargo crate,
Man at arms Erik shoots rats
and the crew if they post late!
_________________________________
I may have a go at setting this to music this evening
Come with me and meet the crew
of the Python "Drabble Far"
Commander Psykokow aims her
at the heart of every star.
The engine room makes such strange sounds
under Simoof tender care,
Gunner Frank mans the turret beams,
escort fighter Kerrash beware!
Take a journey to a distant star
With the crew of the Python “Drabble Far”
Simon Winnard on the comms
causes hardly any wars,
Doc Stone's bedside manner gives
all his patients woe good cause.
Mogadon and Gal Midden
can smash any cargo crate,
Man at arms Erik shoots rats
and the crew if they post late!
_________________________________
I may have a go at setting this to music this evening
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Goose4291
Banned
The Quiet Before The Storm
“Beat to quarters!” The sound of kettle drums began reverberating throughout the Fretensis, as her crew closed up at their action stations.
Into the organised chaos of the CiC strode Trierarchus Marcellus, still buttoning his resplendent red Imperial tunic and adjusting the scabbard of his ceremonial Officers sword.
“Report, Naverrichi Pullings”
“Sir, we got a garbled transmission from the picket boat. They report one contact, not matching any known ship signature. Ship is at Condition One.”
Marcellus smiled, proud of his crews professionalism. He grabbed the internal comms handset, keying it open “This is Fretensis Actual. Prepare for combat jump.”
“Beat to quarters!” The sound of kettle drums began reverberating throughout the Fretensis, as her crew closed up at their action stations.
Into the organised chaos of the CiC strode Trierarchus Marcellus, still buttoning his resplendent red Imperial tunic and adjusting the scabbard of his ceremonial Officers sword.
“Report, Naverrichi Pullings”
“Sir, we got a garbled transmission from the picket boat. They report one contact, not matching any known ship signature. Ship is at Condition One.”
Marcellus smiled, proud of his crews professionalism. He grabbed the internal comms handset, keying it open “This is Fretensis Actual. Prepare for combat jump.”
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