I don't see anyone freaking out. I see you - a month into the game - insisting on changes, more experienced players trying to help you understand why those aren't the right changes, and you not doing much in the way of listening.
You're a month in and have engineered three ships. Kudos to you, because I think that's sincerely amazing. My head would explode with that much grind in a month. I've been playing for years and have finished engineering 2 ships. Of course you and your friends have some issues related to mats gathering grind...you're doing it all in a month!!!
The problem is not that there are too many material types. The problem is that players want the G5 godship NOW, so they grind to get it done, and it's a horrendous gameplay experience. It's worse than a job. I did the same thing at first, and promptly quit the game for a year. When I came back, someone on this forum explained to me that engineering and mats gathering are FAR better experienced in the course of just playing the game. Explore, do some missions, haul some passengers, kill some pirates, harvest some mats, go see the engineer, tinker with your ship, go play some more. You'll find that your materials bins fill up more or less by accident, and it's much more fun this way.
100% agree with this. The idea of an engineering "roll" is an oxymoron. My son is an engineer. Works on stuff for the space program, actually. I'll have to ask him if they got a good "roll" on the last satellite they launched.