I laugh that someone who broke their neck and endured surgeries with permanent hardware attached to their spine in the service of their country, and every job they ever had put their life in danger on a regular basis is insulted as weak or scared, and other names we cannot mention here, simply because they chill out in games, having lived through as much adventure and real adrenaline in their life that a video game can never match.
Let me tell you what I have seen over the years. Playing in a private group with a new friend for a few years. He came from playing solo to private group, just as I did, and several other friends.
It was so long ago I cannot remember if it was on Discord we met or in Mobius.
We would go about picking up mats on a planet for hours, mining, running cargo, grinding forever.
Eventually the group grew, and we all played in private groups for years.
I was gone for a while but came back and was told the group was open only now, which was great.
I had a mostly engineered Vette, and he told me to shoot at his ship to see how good his ship was, so I blipped him, he said to really shoot at him and try to kill him. In 30 minutes, I could not bring his shields down.
He had done all the engineering and power play and everything up to this point, for years, in solo and private group.
But now that he had an almost invincible ship, he made the open only rule.
One evening there were some pretty rude insults by a friend in open toward another player which really caught me off guard, so I googled his handle and a Reddit thread came up and him and several old longtime solo/private group only friends for years who had also built up everything they had in solo and private groups where bragging about how big and bad they were, and how only cowards played in solo or private groups.
They bragged that their circle of friends played in open only and always had.
And they bragged about killing noobs who screwed up (But using a nastier way of putting it) and made the huge mistake of logging into open, and other things.
My former best ED playing friend was fortunately not in the thread.
I commented to the guys about the thread, and about how we had played for years in private groups and was quickly kicked from the group.
I have seen with my own eyes many folks claiming to have thousands of hours in open only yet spent years with them in a private group.